Anti-religious people marrying religious people

[KingKhanWC]

Its very strange someone who is anti-religion, athiest, anti-theist etc marrying someone who is religious. I dont mean someone who may believe in a higher power/God but someone who practices their religion.

Are there any athiests on here who are married to a religious person?

I just dont get it. As a Muslim I would marry a Muslim, Christian or Jewish girl because they are monotheistic. A difference of opinion but God is one , all powerful , all knowing etc. ..you can both agree.

But an athiest marrrying someone who believes in 'fairy stories' is strange.

I as a Muslim would never marry someone who believes in flying spaghetti monster, pink unicorn, animal diety etc. They are a can short of a six pack imo. Why spend a life time with someone who believes in what I think is fake, false, nonsense etc.

What is more strange is for an anti-religious person who spends so much time criticising religion but is married to someone who practices religion. What is wrong such people?

 

[KingKhanWC]

Would you marry someone who believes in flying chickens who have the power to peck anyone who is doing bad deeds?

 

[ElRaja]

i have thought about this being of the "pastafarian" inclination. Now i have friends who are very religious, and as an extension of that i don't think i would have a problem living with a religious person. i like to think i dont judge a person by their religious inclinations (unless they feel compelled to preach, which is another matter)

the issue here is that there would be fundamental issues with having kids, i.e. evolution vs creationism, enforcing prayer, etc. if there are no kids involved i think religious and non religious people get on just fine, but given that's what marriage is for (primarily imo), in the long run i came to the conclusion such an arrangement wouldn't work.

 

[KingKhanWC]

i have thought about this being of the "pastafarian" inclination. Now i have friends who are very religious, and as an extension of that i don't think i would have a problem living with a religious person. i like to think i dont judge a person by their religious inclinations (unless they feel compelled to preach, which is another matter)

the issue here is that there would be fundamental issues with having kids, i.e. evolution vs creationism, enforcing prayer, etc. if there are no kids involved i think religious and non religious people get on just fine, but given that's what marriage is for (primarily imo), in the long run i came to the conclusion such an arrangement wouldn't work.

You wear a siv on your head?

Its not about judging but marrying someone who believes in fairy tales. If you are fine with it, cool. Thanks for the input.

 

[ElRaja]

You wear a siv on your head?

a metaphorical one

Its not about judging but marrying someone who believes in fairy tales. If you are fine with it, cool. Thanks for the input.

nah, dont think it works in the long run...

in the long run i came to the conclusion such an arrangement wouldn't work.

 

[Slog]

Yep but this isnt about him but in general.

Would you marry someone who believes in flying chickens who have the power to peck anyone who is doing bad deeds?

Why are you putting the onus on the atheists here? The religious people shouldn’t then be marrying the atheist either.

If anything the onus is more on the religious person. The atheists believes they die and there is no accountability for their decisions, Day of judgement etc. however the religious people do believe and will need to explain their decision. So they shouldn’t be taking such a decision in the first place

 

[KingKhanWC]

Why are you putting the onus on the atheists here? The religious people shouldn’t then be marrying the atheist either.

If anything the onus is more on the religious person. The atheists believes they die and there is no accountability for their decisions, Day of judgement etc. however the religious people do believe and will need to explain their decision. So they shouldn’t be taking such a decision in the first place

I wrote in the OP

"I as a Muslim would never marry someone who believes in flying spaghetti monster, pink unicorn, animal diety etc. They are a can short of a six pack imo. Why spend a life time with someone who believes in what I think is fake, false, nonsense etc."

Its for both.

 

[Itachi]

Probably to "show them the light".

 

[JaDed]

[MENTION=146530]DeadBall[/MENTION] i somehow thought this would be referenced but didn’t think so early and as a thread.

 

[Savak]

I am not anti religion but I am not very religious either but I have ended up marrying a traditional religious girl

 

[KingKhanWC]

I am not anti religion but I am not very religious either but I have ended up marrying a traditional religious girl

Do you believe in God, the same God as her?

 

[KingKhanWC]

Probably to "show them the light".

Its not working for someone. Attacks religion on his keyboard while sitting under paintings of 'Christ' and crucifix hanging over the head.

 

[Slog]

I wrote in the OP

"I as a Muslim would never marry someone who believes in flying spaghetti monster, pink unicorn, animal diety etc. They are a can short of a six pack imo. Why spend a life time with someone who believes in what I think is fake, false, nonsense etc."

Its for both.

The questions in the OP are posed to the “anti-religious” people rather than the religious people.

In any case as a I said I believe the onus should be more on the religious people making such a decision because in their belief the stakes are much higher.

 

[KingKhanWC]

The questions in the OP are posed to the “anti-religious” people rather than the religious people.

In any case as a I said I believe the onus should be more on the religious people making such a decision because in their belief the stakes are much higher.

Im more interested in why anti-religious people choose to marry a religious person. If you want to discuss anything else related, go for it. Thanks for the contribution.

 

[Mamoon]

Im more interested in why anti-religious people choose to marry a religious person. If you want to discuss anything else related, go for it. Thanks for the contribution.

Because religion is or should be a private matter? Would you extend the same logic to non-practicing Muslims? What good is faith if you don’t act on it?

 

[KingKhanWC]

Because religion is or should be a private matter? Would you extend the same logic to non-practicing Muslims? What good is faith if you don’t act on it?

lol Private between husband and wife?

You've married recently, what is her faith?

 

[Cpt. Rishwat]

Im more interested in why anti-religious people choose to marry a religious person. If you want to discuss anything else related, go for it. Thanks for the contribution.

I kind of agree with Slog, really the onus should be more on the religious partner, especially if you heed what is actually ordained by Allah in the Quran, to marry for religion above other reasons.

That said, I agree there is a strange dynamic at play when a non-religious person marries a religious one. Take Tory MP Sajid Javed for example: he has claimed he is not at all religious, but he is married to a practicising Christian, and he more or less admits she wears the pants in the house and takes responsibility for raising their children, presumably as Christians.

This may seem strange to obvservers, but you can understand while a person may not be a believer himself, he or she would maybe prefer their children to be brought up with a religious grounding to cement their moral code with a simple logic which won't confuse them.

 

[DeadBall]

[MENTION=146530]DeadBall[/MENTION] i somehow thought this would be referenced but didn’t think so early and as a thread.

Yeah, although not surprising given the track record of the OP. Would've answered if he had asked me directly without him beating around the bush and playing his usual games.

Anyway on to the topic at hand. You cannot do much when you're in love and I don't mean the puppy love but living with someone for 5 years before deciding to live the rest of your life with them. We had had our religious (and other) arguments as is normal and after a while realized our differences weren't that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things.

She is a deeply spiritual person and believes in the existence of some higher power and studied various religious beliefs. It's just that she was born in a Christian household and thus that takes preference due to her upbringing however we did Nikkah in the Islamic tradition in the UAE and Pakistan and then in an Orthodox church for her in Romania and Germany. Both our parents knew my stance on religion and didn't force me to do anything overtly religious but I went through with it to give joy to our families, as for me it was just saying a few verses I didn't really believe in but I suppose it was a bit harder for her but she did it anyway.

She wasn't much for church and all and went through the normal phases becoming a bit more religious in the past year (as you can see from the icons in last years Christmas tree picture and this one) because it was a very tough year (which we have thankfully finally gotten over) and she needed something extra and divine to believe in.

As for the subject of children posed here re creationism vs evolution our daughter was brought up in the West and she was taught irrefutable and data backed Science without any religious agendas. She had her questions like any other child and we both answered her honestly i,e what Mommy believed in and what I did. We also celebrated Christmas, Easter and Eid which was more of a cultural, traditional thing rather than a religious occasion. It was a time to have family around, eat, drink and make merry. She is 17 now and not really that religious as is the case with most teenagers brought up with so much information on the internet etc. They can make up their own minds. If she chooses to go down the religious path later on in life that is her choice.

The OP goes on about how could someone marry or cohabit someone from another religion or no religion is because they they have been living in their own little world of theirs and probably never had to make hard decisions in life and if they had to they probably chose the easier, more comfortable and trouble free way. Also to him love seems like a foreign concept as it is all about a matter of convenience for him. He is living under his own convenient rock.

Also as OP keeps on harping about what I have against religion, I don't really. As long as you don't shove religion in our faces and force us to adhere to your views, we are fine. But this is done constantly especially in the Sub Continent and many Arab countries. I don't hate religion per se, what I hate is the holier than thou behavior and hypocrisy of it.

So as long as you keep it a personal thing then it's fine by me but as soon as it starts to affect me personally and my surrounding i,e who qualifies as a Muslim (Christian/Hindu etc) and who is not and whether someone deserves the death penalty or not then I will confront it.

 

[KingKhanWC]

I kind of agree with Slog, really the onus should be more on the religious partner, especially if you heed what is actually ordained by Allah in the Quran, to marry for religion above other reasons.

That said, I agree there is a strange dynamic at play when a non-religious person marries a religious one. Take Tory MP Sajid Javed for example: he has claimed he is not at all religious, but he is married to a practicising Christian, and he more or less admits she wears the pants in the house and takes responsibility for raising their children, presumably as Christians.

This may seem strange to obvservers, but you can understand while a person may not be a believer himself, he or she would maybe prefer their children to be brought up with a religious grounding to cement their moral code with a simple logic which won't confuse them.

I am referring to the ones who spend time on the internet abusing/criticising religion but have paintings of God, crosses, religious figures all over the house. Why don't they spend the same time telling their spouse he/she is a Looney believing in some silly fairy story nonsense? Hypocrites or just internet trolls?

Muslims do marry religion if they are practicing in general but as I wrote Im interested in religion haters marrying religious people. Do they need to go see the doctor?

 

[Mamoon]

lol Private between husband and wife?

You've married recently, what is her faith?

Same as mine, but she is more practicing. Their is a personal space between couples as well, and I believe religion fits there.

I understand why someone wouldn’t want to marry someone from a different religion considering the potential implications on the upbringing of the children.

However, you seem to be drawing a line between theism and atheism only which is strange.

 

[DeadlyVenom]

It depends on the level of anti-religiousness from the athiest. If you believe that a person is a genuine idiot for believing in a God ( as many hardcore athiests do) then it makes absolutely no sense to marry a religious person.

If you view religion as something thats just not for you but ok if it gives another person comfort, or in the same vein as mild superstitious beliefs then it could probably work.

 

[KingKhanWC]

It depends on the level of anti-religiousness from the athiest. If you believe that a person is a genuine idiot for believing in a God ( as many hardcore athiests do) then it makes absolutely no sense to marry a religious person.

If you view religion as something thats just not for you but ok if it gives another person comfort, or in the same vein as mild superstitious beliefs then it could probably work.

Spot on. I think we can safely assume those spend hours and hours on the net abusing/criticising others will fall into the first category.

What in your opinion is their issue then? They will marry someone who they feel is a fool, idiot or stupid person, accept them but will continue attacking others for the same views as their life partner. Are they just trolls or have some sort of mental issues?

 

[DeadlyVenom]

Spot on. I think we can safely assume those spend hours and hours on the net abusing/criticising others will fall into the first category.

What in your opinion is their issue then? They will marry someone who they feel is a fool, idiot or stupid person, accept them but will continue attacking others for the same views as their life partner. Are they just trolls or have some sort of mental issues?

Its an incredibly intriguing scenario. I would love to know the thoughts going through each persons head in such a scenario.

One partner believes that the other is an idiot and the other may believe the partner is going to hell for disbelieving lol.

This is what happens when people become infected with a spiritual sickness and denial of their true beliefs.

 

[KingKhanWC]

Its an incredibly intriguing scenario. I would love to know the thoughts going through each persons head in such a scenario.

One partner believes that the other is an idiot and the other may believe the partner is going to hell for disbelieving lol.

This is what happens when people become infected with a spiritual sickness and denial of their true beliefs.

It would also be interesting to see if the religious partner converts to another faith, ie Satanic worshi etc.and if the anti religion partner still thinks the other is still an idiot or a big idiot.

Imagine if the partner turned up to a new found faith ...Prince Philip Movement. and turns up like this ......

The Prince Philip Movement is a cargo cult of the Yaohnanen tribe on the southern island of Tanna in Vanuatu. The Yaohnanen believe that Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, the consort to Queen Elizabeth II, is a divine being, the pale-skinned son of a mountain spirit and brother of John Frum.

 

[JaDed]

If this seems to be an intriguing question then defn religious people who still live in these western capitalists countries which has so many aspects which go against the their religion continue to thrive in those societies without agreeing to them sounds more intriguing to me personally.

Atleast while marrying someone we can set aside the particular difference and move on but how do people manage to be in a system that makes them abide by these contradictions?

 

[Cpt. Rishwat]

If this seems to be an intriguing question then defn religious people who still live in these western capitalists countries which has so many aspects which go against the their religion continue to thrive in those societies without agreeing to them sounds more intriguing to me personally.

Atleast while marrying someone we can set aside the particular difference and move on but how do people manage to be in a system that makes them abide by these contradictions?

Not that hard I imagine. Just live within the rules.

 

[sindhiboy]

There is the balance of being not too strict and not too careless on practicing your religion

 

[JaDed]

Not that hard I imagine. Just live within the rules.

So you believe western countries are in sync with all religions?
Those rules don’t contradict the beliefs? They probably do so we are ok to set it aside..

 

[DeadlyVenom]

If this seems to be an intriguing question then defn religious people who still live in these western capitalists countries which has so many aspects which go against the their religion continue to thrive in those societies without agreeing to them sounds more intriguing to me personally.

Atleast while marrying someone we can set aside the particular difference and move on but how do people manage to be in a system that makes them abide by these contradictions?

Which contradictions specficially? Im not aware of any laws that stop a religious person from practicing or prevent a religious person from being a full participant in society. In fact, if a religious person feels strongly enough he can band together with other religious people and enter the democratic process to attempt to mend things that they feel are wrong.

Im talking about Europe here. I know its different in India under Modi where Hindus are running riot and forcing other religions to abide by what Hindus deem acceptable.

 

[shaz619]

I think when it comes to those people it's probably either love or beauty so they go above and beyond for it, unfortunately if children are involved then they will be extremely confused and I don't quiet understand how one can be raised to be 100% objective / make a choice for themselves because ultimately they take after the parents and how they are raised which would be tricky in that regard unless there is some form of an agreement where either the husband or wife compromise on how they ought to be raised in line with their specific view. But I would be interested to see examples where the goal was to raise children for them to make their own moves on faith etc and what the outcome was.

 

[DeadBall]

I think when it comes to those people it's probably either love or beauty so they go above and beyond for it, unfortunately if children are involved then they will be extremely confused and I don't quiet understand how one can be raised to be 100% objective / make a choice for themselves because ultimately they take after the parents and how they are raised which would be tricky in that regard unless there is some form of an agreement where either the husband or wife compromise on how they ought to be raised in line with their specific view. But I would be interested to see examples where the goal was to raise children for them to make their own moves on faith etc and what the outcome was.

That is all speculation on your behalf. As usual the believers are quick to judge and condemn without having any experience in the matter itself whatsoever. The answer or MY answer is there in the original post as I have already raised a child in such a household.

As for the subject of children posed here re creationism vs evolution our daughter was brought up in the West and she was taught irrefutable and data backed Science without any religious agendas. She had her questions like any other child and we both answered her honestly i,e what Mommy believed in and what I did. We also celebrated Christmas, Easter and Eid which was more of a cultural, traditional thing rather than a religious occasion. It was a time to have family around, eat, drink and make merry. She is 17 now and not really that religious as is the case with most teenagers brought up with so much information on the internet etc. They can make up their own minds. If she chooses to go down the religious path later on in life that is her choice.

I understand the children growing up in religious conservative households, especially in the West having various doubts but that is not the case with the majority, especially with the availability of so much information at hand, basically the children, teens, adults etc having way better topics to discuss than the religion forced upon them whether Music is halal or not, or does chewing gum break your fast and all other pointless debates.

 

[Pakistanian]

People should only marry people that share their values and beliefs.

 

[Suleiman]

I am not anti religion but I am not very religious either but I have ended up marrying a traditional religious girl

Congrats bro, know you went through a lot of headaches before settling down.

 

[mgtow]

No matter how crooked you are but you would want to marry pious wife/husband rather than the partner with the record of infidelity.

Similarity, atheists are hypocrite. They want freedom for women but they won’t marry them due to obvious reasons.

 

[mgtow]

Because religion is or should be a private matter? Would you extend the same logic to non-practicing Muslims? What good is faith if you don’t act on it?

The decoration of faith has nothing to do with the community and the society. It has to do with GOD thus the whole point of faith.

Whether one person acts on the protocol of faith or not should have no relevancy to those who don’t have faith in GOD therefore shouldn’t presume to lecture on hypocrisy as the atheists are no difference either - totally opposite to their own ideology.

 

[Itachi]

It depends on the level of anti-religiousness from the athiest. If you believe that a person is a genuine idiot for believing in a God ( as many hardcore athiests do) then it makes absolutely no sense to marry a religious person.

If you view religion as something thats just not for you but ok if it gives another person comfort, or in the same vein as mild superstitious beliefs then it could probably work.

Athiesm isn't anti religious. Atheism just questions the beliefs instead of blind faith. If you could bring evidence to support those beliefs, an atheist will become a theist instantly. However, you could argue this could be against abrahmaic religions which upto an extent is true which relies on blind faith. But not all religion forbids asking questions.

Hence you can call Athiesm as somewhat anti abrahmaic religion belief system but as anti religious? No. Because abrahmaic religions are just a subset of a bigger set.

 

[Itachi]

No matter how crooked you are but you would want to marry pious wife/husband rather than the partner with the record of infidelity.

Similarity, atheists are hypocrite. They want freedom for women but they won’t marry them due to obvious reasons.

Atheist aren't social justice warriors. You are bringing two different concept altogether.

 

[JaDed]

Which contradictions specficially? Im not aware of any laws that stop a religious person from practicing or prevent a religious person from being a full participant in society. In fact, if a religious person feels strongly enough he can band together with other religious people and enter the democratic process to attempt to mend things that they feel are wrong.

Im talking about Europe here. I know its different in India under Modi where Hindus are running riot and forcing other religions to abide by what Hindus deem acceptable.

Interest rate, homosexuality, nationalism. You can go on about India.. try the bait some other day..

 

[andy0204]

Why they are getting married,their thoughts, beliefs are different?
Iam surprised if they are.

 

[Itachi]

Why they are getting married,their thoughts, beliefs are different?
Iam surprised if they are.

Because each can run parallel to each other. The paths could be different, but if ultimate goal is same, then many people can co exist even having different beliefs.

 

[mgtow]

Atheist aren't social justice warriors. You are bringing two different concept altogether.

How so? This thread is about why anti-religion member or atheist marry religious person rather than their own club.

I am just simply trying to fill the blanks as to why. The answer is already there.

 

[mgtow]

Athiesm isn't anti religious. Atheism just questions the beliefs instead of blind faith. If you could bring evidence to support those beliefs, an atheist will become a theist instantly. However, you could argue this could be against abrahmaic religions which upto an extent is true which relies on blind faith. But not all religion forbids asking questions.

Hence you can call Athiesm as somewhat anti abrahmaic religion belief system but as anti religious? No. Because abrahmaic religions are just a subset of a bigger set.

Atheism is anti-religion. Their jobs are to question everything on the religion with their choosing battle. Their jobs are to present perspective that contracts the ideology of the religion. The way they do is matter of technique that isn’t consistent but however, that allows to maintain their point of view as fact even though it is opinion that cannot be backed. They will keep changing their manner of speaking as long as it puts them on the map.

To the extent they resort to go through to provide their narrative by downplaying the narrative of the religion’s official narrative at must.

They are determined to prove by downplaying the position of the religion’s belief by hook or crook. We have some examples here. It is clearly anti-religion by the passion of the motivation.

 

[Slog]

Im more interested in why anti-religious people choose to marry a religious person. If you want to discuss anything else related, go for it. Thanks for the contribution.

Why don religious people marry atheists or anti religion people?

The stakes are higher for religious people. Since they will be punished for that on the day of judgement.

For atheists stakes are lower and there is no punishment for their decision of marrying a religious person.

So your premise is faulty to begin with.

 

[Itachi]

Atheism is anti-religion. Their jobs are to question everything on the religion with their choosing battle. Their jobs are to present perspective that contracts the ideology of the religion. The way they do is matter of technique that isn’t consistent but however, that allows to maintain their point of view as fact even though it is opinion that cannot be backed. They will keep changing their manner of speaking as long as it puts them on the map.

To the extent they resort to go through to provide their narrative by downplaying the narrative of the religion’s official narrative at must.

They are determined to prove by downplaying the position of the religion’s belief by hook or crook. We have some examples here. It is clearly anti-religion by the passion of the motivation.

I am an atheist. What you are describing is, social justice warriors. An atheist too can be a SJW but an atheist may not be a SJW.

 

[RajBan]

Yeah, although not surprising given the track record of the OP. Would've answered if he had asked me directly without him beating around the bush and playing his usual games.

Anyway on to the topic at hand. You cannot do much when you're in love and I don't mean the puppy love but living with someone for 5 years before deciding to live the rest of your life with them. We had had our religious (and other) arguments as is normal and after a while realized our differences weren't that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things.

She is a deeply spiritual person and believes in the existence of some higher power and studied various religious beliefs. It's just that she was born in a Christian household and thus that takes preference due to her upbringing however we did Nikkah in the Islamic tradition in the UAE and Pakistan and then in an Orthodox church for her in Romania and Germany. Both our parents knew my stance on religion and didn't force me to do anything overtly religious but I went through with it to give joy to our families, as for me it was just saying a few verses I didn't really believe in but I suppose it was a bit harder for her but she did it anyway.

She wasn't much for church and all and went through the normal phases becoming a bit more religious in the past year (as you can see from the icons in last years Christmas tree picture and this one) because it was a very tough year (which we have thankfully finally gotten over) and she needed something extra and divine to believe in.

As for the subject of children posed here re creationism vs evolution our daughter was brought up in the West and she was taught irrefutable and data backed Science without any religious agendas. She had her questions like any other child and we both answered her honestly i,e what Mommy believed in and what I did. We also celebrated Christmas, Easter and Eid which was more of a cultural, traditional thing rather than a religious occasion. It was a time to have family around, eat, drink and make merry. She is 17 now and not really that religious as is the case with most teenagers brought up with so much information on the internet etc. They can make up their own minds. If she chooses to go down the religious path later on in life that is her choice.

The OP goes on about how could someone marry or cohabit someone from another religion or no religion is because they they have been living in their own little world of theirs and probably never had to make hard decisions in life and if they had to they probably chose the easier, more comfortable and trouble free way. Also to him love seems like a foreign concept as it is all about a matter of convenience for him. He is living under his own convenient rock.

Also as OP keeps on harping about what I have against religion, I don't really. As long as you don't shove religion in our faces and force us to adhere to your views, we are fine. But this is done constantly especially in the Sub Continent and many Arab countries. I don't hate religion per se, what I hate is the holier than thou behavior and hypocrisy of it.

So as long as you keep it a personal thing then it's fine by me but as soon as it starts to affect me personally and my surrounding i,e who qualifies as a Muslim (Christian/Hindu etc) and who is not and whether someone deserves the death penalty or not then I will confront it.

Such a lovely balanced post.

 

[Flat_Track_Bully]

I believe in God but don't believe in religion. A lot of Muslims find this hard to digest and accuse me of apostasy but what is purer than a direct connection to God without sacrificing morality on topics such as polygamy, paedophilia and murder by religion and worshipping a human. My wife is the same and we are very happy. I don't have the burden of guilt of immorality or fear a veangeful blood thirsty God. My mind is at peace and my instinct tells me I have on the right path.

I could not be with a Muslim partner, or a Hindu or Christian etc. Shared values are very important.

 

[Ronaldo7]

I believe in God but don't believe in religion. A lot of Muslims find this hard to digest and accuse me of apostasy but what is purer than a direct connection to God without sacrificing morality on topics such as polygamy, paedophilia and murder by religion and worshipping a human. My wife is the same and we are very happy. I don't have the burden of guilt of immorality or fear a veangeful blood thirsty God. My mind is at peace and my instinct tells me I have on the right path.

I could not be with a Muslim partner, or a Hindu or Christian etc. Shared values are very important.

Where country do you live in currently?

Also, if you don't believe in religion but believe in God, do you not think God may have communicated to us through prophets? Which is essentially what religion is.
Do you think God didn't send anyone to spread the word?

 

[Flat_Track_Bully]

Where country do you live in currently?

Also, if you don't believe in religion but believe in God, do you not think God may have communicated to us through prophets? Which is essentially what religion is.
Do you think God didn't send anyone to spread the word?

I believe the universe is by intelligent design and my morality determined by my intuition and my rational mind.

I don't believe in prophets or scripture of any kind, this includes Hinduism Christianity Islam etc. Its a tool used to control in whatever period of history. Man made jigonism to herd the masses. Bit like North Korea.

There is no money in just believing in God. There is money in following a religion which is why its been pushed on us since forever.

 

[the Great Khan]

Interesting topic. In my view if a religious person marries a non religious person they weren't that religious to begin with.

From an Islamic point of view Islam isn't a religion. Actually the best word we can use to describe it. Deen as we call it doesn't actually have an English translation. The closest I have come to a description is state of being.

Islam isn't just a bunch of rituals..if you think it its then it's probably easy to be with someone who also has rituals..inmho

 

[Robert]

Its very strange someone who is anti-religion, athiest, anti-theist etc marrying someone who is religious. I dont mean someone who may believe in a higher power/God but someone who practices their religion.

Are there any athiests on here who are married to a religious person?

I just dont get it. As a Muslim I would marry a Muslim, Christian or Jewish girl because they are monotheistic. A difference of opinion but God is one , all powerful , all knowing etc. ..you can both agree.

But an athiest marrrying someone who believes in 'fairy stories' is strange.

I as a Muslim would never marry someone who believes in flying spaghetti monster, pink unicorn, animal diety etc. They are a can short of a six pack imo. Why spend a life time with someone who believes in what I think is fake, false, nonsense etc.

What is more strange is for an anti-religious person who spends so much time criticising religion but is married to someone who practices religion. What is wrong such people?

Perhaps they love the person they are with.

I’m an atheist sometimes, a deist sometimes, a Buddhist sometimes, a pagan sometimes.

I married a woman of faith.

It works ok. My war with God is over. I came to a point where my own ego structure isn’t rigid enough to be threatened by people who disagree with me. As long as people are kind and generous, they can believe whatever they like.

 

[Ronaldo7]

I believe the universe is by intelligent design and my morality determined by my intuition and my rational mind.

I don't believe in prophets or scripture of any kind, this includes Hinduism Christianity Islam etc. Its a tool used to control in whatever period of history. Man made jigonism to herd the masses. Bit like North Korea.

There is no money in just believing in God. There is money in following a religion which is why its been pushed on us since forever.

I get that but don't you think God might have wanted to guide us through prophets?
According to you, religion was just made to control people but don't you think there is one true religion which has been copied by other false religions?

 

[Flat_Track_Bully]

I get that but don't you think God might have wanted to guide us through prophets?
According to you, religion was just made to control people but don't you think there is one true religion which has been copied by other false religions?

No I don't believe God intervenes after creating the universe. The big bang was a divine spark, a thought of God.

Religion was always man made imho, a combo of superstituon and old tales repackaged time after time. Rebranded and resold. Just a business.

Look up at the sky and I see proof of God and thats all I need. I do believe immortality can be achieved (heaven) but for that you need a firm belief of God and strong moral principles. Otherwise you die permanently. Hell doesn't exist you just become non existent after death if you have lived an immoral life.

 

[Ronaldo7]

No I don't believe God intervenes after creating the universe. The big bang was a divine spark, a thought of God.

Religion was always man made imho, a combo of superstituon and old tales repackaged time after time. Rebranded and resold. Just a business.

Look up at the sky and I see proof of God and thats all I need. I do believe immortality can be achieved (heaven) but for that you need a firm belief of God and strong moral principles. Otherwise you die permanently. Hell doesn't exist you just become non existent after death if you have lived an immoral life.

I see.

What principles are you talking about and how do you know what things are considered moral and what are considered immoral by God?

So like do you think eating meat is considered moral or immoral as both sides can be argued for?
And as you believe in no religious scripture, how do you know whether God thinks eating meat is moral or immoral?

 

[Itachi]

I believe in God but don't believe in religion. A lot of Muslims find this hard to digest and accuse me of apostasy but what is purer than a direct connection to God without sacrificing morality on topics such as polygamy, paedophilia and murder by religion and worshipping a human. My wife is the same and we are very happy. I don't have the burden of guilt of immorality or fear a veangeful blood thirsty God. My mind is at peace and my instinct tells me I have on the right path.

I could not be with a Muslim partner, or a Hindu or Christian etc. Shared values are very important.

Even as an atheist, I do believe you have healthy approach towards shared values.

What I find odd is, people try to overlook the overall message of a religion but get tied up with small customs.

What every religion teaches? Peace, be kind to your family, neighbors. Help the ones who is struggling with life....

But what they will ask? What kind of meat you eat?

It is more important what kind of meat you eat rather than caring about people.

 

[Robert]

No I don't believe God intervenes after creating the universe. The big bang was a divine spark, a thought of God.

Religion was always man made imho, a combo of superstituon and old tales repackaged time after time. Rebranded and resold. Just a business.

Look up at the sky and I see proof of God and thats all I need. I do believe immortality can be achieved (heaven) but for that you need a firm belief of God and strong moral principles. Otherwise you die permanently. Hell doesn't exist you just become non existent after death if you have lived an immoral life.

I believe that I am immortal in the sense that the universe will remake me into something else after I am dead. Worm food, or a tree, or eventually space dust.

 

[dildilpak]

IMO this thread is a bit offensive - calling out somebody’s upbringing of their child or choice of life partner is below the belt. Its none of our business to pass judgement on somebody’s personal family life & values.

Religion again is a personal interpretation. I could be reading the same religious book/scripture as the next person - but it may have a different degree of influence on me basis my various life situations. Some may chose to follow it blindly, some like me (i am an agnostic) are ambivalent about it, some may follow it simply because they don’t want to rock the boat or some may reject it completely - again its a personal choice & nobody has a right to question it, till it does not start intruding in the public domain.

To the OP - what you call as a ‘fairy tale’ religion is just your opinion of it - there could be many who have chosen to follow that religion, not simply because they are born into that religion but because they have faith in that religion & till the time they are good human beings & dont harm you, it shouldn’t matter to you what they do or whom they marry (& what are the religious dynamics with their spouse) or how they bring up their children. To each one his own.

 

[troodon]

Anti-religious people have no religion. Hence no hatred to any particular group.

We have no issues marrying religious folks. I let my wife teach our kids Hinduism. Its good for them. I let them decide what is best for them. If they come to me for my input, I will surely tell them in no soft words.

 

[The_Odd_One]

Regardless of their belief or lack of it, a person can still be kind and a good human being. As long as the couple gives each other their personal space, a marriage like that would work.

We must not forget that a lot of people turn atheist later in their life, sometimes when they are married and have kids already. This said, there is nothing wrong with considering religion as a factor when looking for a spouse.

 

[The_Odd_One]

Anti-religious people have no religion. Hence no hatred to any particular group.

We have no issues marrying religious folks. I let my wife teach our kids Hinduism. Its good for them. I let them decide what is best for them. If they come to me for my input, I will surely tell them in no soft words.

I agree. Religion on the surface is good for kids. It can be used as a tool to instill some basic values in them like staying away from lying, stealing, hurting someone, breaking rules, etc. The problem arises when you dig deeper into the religion as an adult. That is why, as an atheist parent, you have to hide the ugly part of religion from them and encourage free thinking. When they grow up, they can make up their own mind.

 

[Savak]

Just because an individual is religious does not mean he will be a pleasant husband, have seen absolute horror stories.

A friend of mine who used to be religious in his youth has now turned to vices like drugs, drinking which was unimaginable when i knew him in my university days.

Most important thing to focus on when getting into a life long bond with an individual is focusing on what kind of people they are, are they good human beings or not, do they have a traditional upbringing or not and what is their opinion - vision on a Husband-Wife relationship.

 

[The_Odd_One]

Just because an individual is religious does not mean he will be a pleasant husband, have seen absolute horror stories.

A friend of mine who used to be religious in his youth has now turned to vices like drugs, drinking which was unimaginable when i knew him in my university days.

Most important thing to focus on when getting into a life long bond with an individual is focusing on what kind of people they are, are they good human beings or not, do they have a traditional upbringing or not and what is their opinion - vision on a Husband-Wife relationship.

The janitor at our local mosque turned out to be a wife-beater. Last year, the mosque management were singing his praises, this year they fired him.

 

[Ronaldo7]

I agree. Religion on the surface is good for kids. It can be used as a tool to instill some basic values in them like staying away from lying, stealing, hurting someone, breaking rules, etc. The problem arises when you dig deeper into the religion as an adult. That is why, as an atheist parent, you have to hide the ugly part of religion from them and encourage free thinking. When they grow up, they can make up their own mind.

What religion do you follow if you don't mind me asking?

 

[Dios]

I have seen quite a few cases where the husband is non-practising/non-believing but the wife is religious but never the other way around.

 

[The_Odd_One]

What religion do you follow if you don't mind me asking?

I am an atheist and anti-theist if provoked.

 

[KingKhanWC]

IMO this thread is a bit offensive - calling out somebody’s upbringing of their child or choice of life partner is below the belt. Its none of our business to pass judgement on somebody’s personal family life & values.

Religion again is a personal interpretation. I could be reading the same religious book/scripture as the next person - but it may have a different degree of influence on me basis my various life situations. Some may chose to follow it blindly, some like me (i am an agnostic) are ambivalent about it, some may follow it simply because they don’t want to rock the boat or some may reject it completely - again its a personal choice & nobody has a right to question it, till it does not start intruding in the public domain.

To the OP - what you call as a ‘fairy tale’ religion is just your opinion of it - there could be many who have chosen to follow that religion, not simply because they are born into that religion but because they have faith in that religion & till the time they are good human beings & dont harm you, it shouldn’t matter to you what they do or whom they marry (& what are the religious dynamics with their spouse) or how they bring up their children. To each one his own.

I am playing devils advocate, as I do on most subjects.

From an anti-theist pov they believe religion is merely fairy tales yet they marry someone who believes in some 'invisible' God. I wouldn't marry anyone who believes in some fantasy I don't believe in.

But some interesting replies, seems when it comes to 'love' anti-theists will turn a blind eye but continue ranting to others who they don't know, calling them out for believing in some silly fairy stories. very interesting.

 

[KingKhanWC]

Perhaps they love the person they are with.

I’m an atheist sometimes, a deist sometimes, a Buddhist sometimes, a pagan sometimes.

I married a woman of faith.

It works ok. My war with God is over. I came to a point where my own ego structure isn’t rigid enough to be threatened by people who disagree with me. As long as people are kind and generous, they can believe whatever they like.

Sure but if you are calling out others for following something which you believe is fake, surely you would call out your own first? Not suggesting you do personally.

 

[dildilpak]

I am playing devils advocate, as I do on most subjects.

From an anti-theist pov they believe religion is merely fairy tales yet they marry someone who believes in some 'invisible' God. I wouldn't marry anyone who believes in some fantasy I don't believe in.

But some interesting replies, seems when it comes to 'love' anti-theists will turn a blind eye but continue ranting to others who they don't know, calling them out for believing in some silly fairy stories. very interesting.

Thanks for clarifying, i can finally see your point here. And while i don’t agree with your choice of wording, i agree with the premise - if as an atheist you don’t judge your family members’ faiths & beliefs, don’t judge the faiths of the other faithful too. What is a ‘fairy tale’ for you has a deep connection for others.

At the same time, i would also flip it to say if you deeply believe in your own faith & religion, you should also respect somebody else’s religion or even lack of it. There is no religion which is right or wrong, superior or inferior - so firmly believe that proselytizing about one’s own religion is wrong.

 

[Ronaldo7]

I am an atheist and anti-theist if provoked.

Were you always an atheist?

 

[Robert]

Sure but if you are calling out others for following something which you believe is fake, surely you would call out your own first? Not suggesting you do personally.

Sorry mate, you’ve lost me. Are we talking about some hypothetical atheist whose hypothetical spouse holds faith? I can only speak for myself.

 

[uberkoen]

lol. The marriage police here fears that atheists are taking away their pious brides.

 

[Pakpak]

Religion doesn't come into it. For me at least. My wife helped through the worst period of my life before we married and I would always love her for that. I didn't really care if she was religious or not. I'm happy for my kids to be raised Muslims which they will be. But unlike normal parents I will be there for my kids if they have questions and doubts.

My best friends are massive Muslims too, I never base relationships on whether someone is a Muslim or not. If a person is nice they have my respect. I believe in live and let live. You mentioned about atheists ranting to others here, you're right a lot of them do. But a lot don't either. If there are good debates I'm all for it.

That's why I'm sure you'll admit you'll rarely see my abusing people in religious debates or even participating in them. But what you have to understand is a lot of people are abused beaten forced to believe in religion by families growing up. The bitterness they retain is hard to let go. I have been lucky to not face that but people do.

One of my friends was locked out of his house when he was 16 because his father went through his phone and discovered who he is. This is one example. Right or wrong anyone who'd grow up like this would be bitter about religion. You also have to understand the online world is very different than the real world. People are more open, more aggressive online and their personas are not who they are in real life.

Eg on PP I have seen people hold grudges just because person A would say I don't like Amir. That's it. You'll see them hate each other after that all over PP. I once half jest made a post about religious people being too obsessed with pork and one poster not only hated me but followed me around for months, even bringing that post up in cricket threads.

My point is noone would behave like that in real life if we made the same points re; Amir or pork. People would laugh it off or move on. I remember a thread here where people got incredible hostility for liking GOT over some other show. That would never happen in real life but because it's online it's easy to happen.

As for me I don't care. I was never forced or faced harsh measure. For me It's like being friends with supporters from other political parties for me, as long as noone is forcing their beliefs down on me and vice versa I don't care. My family has been thru some horrid years and religion gave them peace. Who am I to take that away from them by telling them I don't believe it and they shouldn't either. I'm still culturally more Muslim than not. I don't drink eat pork etc values which will stay with me for the rest of my life probably. I hope your eyes haven't for diarrhea after reading through my essay

 

[troodon]

lol. The marriage police here fears that atheists are taking away their pious brides.

Showing the light of nothingness one bride at a time.

 

[KingKhanWC]

Sorry mate, you’ve lost me. Are we talking about some hypothetical atheist whose hypothetical spouse holds faith? I can only speak for myself.

Sure speak for yourself. No not hypothetical but from my experience esp on this forum. Ill simplify. Person A spends time online or elsewhere attacking people who believe in a religion, yet Person A is married to someone who practices religion, has religious paintings etc in the house. Should Person A not spend the time attacking those he/she doesn't know and instead spend the time attacking his/her partners faith? After all it bothers the person so much, why live in such an environment?

Religion doesn't come into it. For me at least. My wife helped through the worst period of my life before we married and I would always love her for that. I didn't really care if she was religious or not. I'm happy for my kids to be raised Muslims which they will be. But unlike normal parents I will be there for my kids if they have questions and doubts.

My best friends are massive Muslims too, I never base relationships on whether someone is a Muslim or not. If a person is nice they have my respect. I believe in live and let live. You mentioned about atheists ranting to others here, you're right a lot of them do. But a lot don't either. If there are good debates I'm all for it.

That's why I'm sure you'll admit you'll rarely see my abusing people in religious debates or even participating in them. But what you have to understand is a lot of people are abused beaten forced to believe in religion by families growing up. The bitterness they retain is hard to let go. I have been lucky to not face that but people do.

One of my friends was locked out of his house when he was 16 because his father went through his phone and discovered who he is. This is one example. Right or wrong anyone who'd grow up like this would be bitter about religion. You also have to understand the online world is very different than the real world. People are more open, more aggressive online and their personas are not who they are in real life.

Eg on PP I have seen people hold grudges just because person A would say I don't like Amir. That's it. You'll see them hate each other after that all over PP. I once half jest made a post about religious people being too obsessed with pork and one poster not only hated me but followed me around for months, even bringing that post up in cricket threads.

My point is noone would behave like that in real life if we made the same points re; Amir or pork. People would laugh it off or move on. I remember a thread here where people got incredible hostility for liking GOT over some other show. That would never happen in real life but because it's online it's easy to happen.

As for me I don't care. I was never forced or faced harsh measure. For me It's like being friends with supporters from other political parties for me, as long as noone is forcing their beliefs down on me and vice versa I don't care. My family has been thru some horrid years and religion gave them peace. Who am I to take that away from them by telling them I don't believe it and they shouldn't either. I'm still culturally more Muslim than not. I don't drink eat pork etc values which will stay with me for the rest of my life probably. I hope your eyes haven't for diarrhea after reading through my essay

[MENTION=8]MIG[/MENTION] potw.

Fantastic balanced post. I hope more people who don't believe in religion act and live like you.

 

[Pakpak]

Sure speak for yourself. No not hypothetical but from my experience esp on this forum. Ill simplify. Person A spends time online or elsewhere attacking people who believe in a religion, yet Person A is married to someone who practices religion, has religious paintings etc in the house. Should Person A not spend the time attacking those he/she doesn't know and instead spend the time attacking his/her partners faith? After all it bothers the person so much, why live in such an environment?


[MENTION=8]MIG[/MENTION] potw.

Fantastic balanced post. I hope more people who don't believe in religion act and live like you.

Thanks bro. Appreciate it.

 

[Tubs]

I'm an atheist (my position is that theism hasn't met the burden of proof, so not accepting a claim that God exists is the most rational position) and my long-term girlfriend is of the same position as me, pretty much. I suppose it does make sense to find a partner of the same/similar view, but it isn't necessary. It really does depend on the level of belief (if you are a devout believer in an Abrahamic faith, I doubt that a relationship with an atheist would work, same as an irrational, die-hard atheist and a religious person). But even then, I'm sure many people can reconcile their beliefs with their partners even if they are the two extremes. As long as there's no arrogance and coercion, it should be fine.

 

[PakLFC]

Such a marriage is bound to fail. The imbalance of views will mean constant fighting and tension between the two people involved. Let alone marrying a non religious or atheist person even mixed religious marriages have many unnecessary struggles and challenges that are much better avoided. Speaking as a Muslim even though Allah allows me to marry a Jewish or Christian lady I'll only marry a Muslimah. Just can't understand why a believer in any faith would want a non-believer as a partner.