How difficult is it for young people to get married today?

[MenInG]

A few thread in TPS about problems with marriages etc - am just wondering if getting married in today's day and age has become too big a challenge!?

 

[Savak]

Getting married for the sake of it isn't difficult! Getting married to someone you feel you deserve and need is a different question

 

[PakLFC]

It is the same as before. Young people of every generation need to be earning well before settling down. It would be an additional benefit if they had their own home. Most parents would want that even if they say don't leave the nest!

 

[Syed1]

Snapchat generation ke nakhray zayda bhar gaye hain..... people think they are perfect and aren't willing to compromise and hence they want the girl/guy to also be completely perfect and exactly in line with what they dreamt about - which never happens.


Also apps like Tinder etc aren't helping, in yesteryears if you liked a girl you tried to court her and put in an effort. Now a days you have literally hundreds of girls at your disposal just a swipe away and all you have to do is to get a match then you can text away.

 

[PetroDollars]

in what ways, you just need more money to get married now, especially in UK or US, you'd need a fortune to just keep up the trends to keep the insta generation happy.

 

[Rayyman]

Snapchat generation ke nakhray zayda bhar gaye hain..... people think they are perfect and aren't willing to compromise and hence they want the girl/guy to also be completely perfect and exactly in line with what they dreamt about - which never happens.


Also apps like Tinder etc aren't helping, in yesteryears if you liked a girl you tried to court her and put in an effort. Now a days you have literally hundreds of girls at your disposal just a swipe away and all you have to do is to get a match then you can text away.

Dude Tinder ain't for marriage...

 

[Syed1]

Dude Tinder ain't for marriage...

Exactly........ read the thread title.

 

[light]

Marriage isn't a difficult thing, well not sure how it is in Pakistan. Talking about western country - however fewer younger gen even wants to get married. What do they call it again? Onegina disease ... that's the new generation mentality right now.

 

[TM Riddle]

Sabse badhiya tarika hai to ask your parents to find a nice match for you.
Works 90% of the time plus if you are lucky you can get a girl who's way out of your league.

 

[Pakistanian]

Yeah but it's cause of the national debt/baby boomers screwing us over.

 

[MenInG]

Sabse badhiya tarika hai to ask your parents to find a nice match for you.
Works 90% of the time plus if you are lucky you can get a girl who's way out of your league.

Think kids today dont trust their parents to do that!

 

[Stewie]

Its a very difficult question to answer.

Depends on where you are, what sort of marriage you are looking for.

I would think with the advent of technology and all these matrimonial sites, it should be easier finding the sort of match you are looking for. People are more flexible now than they were in the past.

But you keep hearing how hard it is these days for families to find good matches for their daughters.. probably because overall economically speaking, it is becoming more and more difficult to make a decent living and solid career and nobody wants to marry their daughters off to someone who cannot provide a decent life.

So many variables and moving parts..

 

[ElRaja]

apps and sites give people too much choice, you filter and filter and filter until you close yourself off to so many people. also on apps peoples mode of interaction is very different, women hold all the bargaining power in the girlfriend game, and they wield that power far more effectively in an app environment than if you met and grew to know someone naturally.

finally for britpaks at least, both genders tend not to have a very high opinion of the other. britpak boys think any desi girl who hangs out and socialises like brits do is morally loose, and britpak girls tend to think desi boys are all backwards, uneducated, wannabe gangsters. its a gross generalisation but loosely true.

 

[Itachi]

Sabse badhiya tarika hai to ask your parents to find a nice match for you.
Works 90% of the time plus if you are lucky you can get a girl who's way out of your league.

Novelty factor wears out over time.

 

[Itachi]

A few thread in TPS about problems with marriages etc - am just wondering if getting married in today's day and age has become too big a challenge!?

I take this aspect in another way.

People have become more independent. Hence you value yourself.

If you are looking for someone by yourself, then you will search for the qualities that you want.

And you won't settle with any x,y,z whoever the parents think is good. The power is shifting towards the young generation even in arranged marriage.

Is it making getting married hard? Yes.

But it is for a better prospect in most cases.

 

[bones]

Islam encourages marrying young. It is to stay away from sin and bless young couples with healthier children. Biologically both men and particularly women are designed to bear children whilst they are younger.

However given the state of affairs in the west right now and the way the system works, marriage is a huge risk for young men. Divorce settlements heavily favour women and most divorces are initiated by women in the west.

 

[bones]

But it is for a better prospect in most cases.

Better prospect? Marriages are on the decline and divorce rates are climbing. There's nothing statistically to back this ridiculous statement.

 

[bones]

But you keep hearing how hard it is these days for families to find good matches for their daughters.. probably because overall economically speaking, it is becoming more and more difficult to make a decent living and solid career and nobody wants to marry their daughters off to someone who cannot provide a decent life. .

Agree with this statement. It's a lot more difficult in the west to find a suitable partner for your daughter. The pool of available bachelors is smaller than bachelorettes and there's a few reasons why. First more Muslim women in the west want to focus on their education and careers. By the time they are ready to marry, men their age are already married. Men will often marry younger and if they have difficulty they will simple go abroad to marry.

I married 7 years ago. Most girls around my age wanted to work, I didn't want a wife who worked. In the end because the families of rishtas here wanted a home and to allow their daughter to work, I had no choice but to marry a girl in Pakistan. Obviously being British made it easy to find lots of suitable proposals, but even then there were lots of demands which according to my parents 20-30 years ago wouldn't have been made.