Abdul
ODI Debutant
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2015
- Runs
- 9,212
I'll fully support them and their hobbies. Yelling and not explaining the reasoning.
-
Contact the PP Team
What parenting mistakes do you vow not to inflict on your own kids, having experienced it yourself?
- Thread starter Abdul
- Start date
Pakistanian
T20I Debutant
- Joined
- Sep 19, 2016
- Runs
- 6,589
Encourage them if their inclined in the arts, music, or sports. Try not to make them too self conscious.
Abdul
ODI Debutant
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2015
- Runs
- 9,212
Why just three of those? Would you have a problem if they wanted to join the law enforcement, for example?
Suleiman
Test Debutant
- Joined
- Mar 17, 2014
- Runs
- 16,944
- Post of the Week
- 2
Boost their confidence and not put them down over very small things. That's one part I hated about growing up with my dad. Complete non issues now that I look back would be made into huge deals, if anything it just makes you more self conscious, but Alhamdullilah I've shed all the negativity living on my own now.
Pakistanian
T20I Debutant
- Joined
- Sep 19, 2016
- Runs
- 6,589
I wouldn't mind, the military and other leas like FBI,ATF,DEA are respectable however I wouldn't be too keen on them joining the cops given the reputation they have down here, they don't get much respect neither is the pay good.
marlonbrowndo
Senior ODI Player
- Joined
- May 29, 2015
- Runs
- 22,526
- Post of the Week
- 2
Nothing. Hopefully I am able to raise my children half as well as my parents raised me. I would get angry at them at times as a kid, but now I fully understand everything they did.
rahulrulezz
Local Club Star
- Joined
- Sep 17, 2007
- Runs
- 1,805
THIS
Even a quarter of my parents would do. The kind of sacrificies, kind of love my parents have done for me and my sis. I don’t think I can ever do that to my kids. I wonder how they always thought about us before themselves. I wonder whether I would become selfless father like my father.
Madplayer
Senior Test Player
- Joined
- Aug 30, 2012
- Runs
- 28,686
- Post of the Week
- 1
Parenting is simple or complex, depends on the way you look at it. It also depends on the kind of person you are.
My dad hardly ever raised a hand on me. Yes he scolded me sometimes as a kid and i did fear it but as i grew up he became milder and milder in his approach. As if he knew the exact extent of control he must have on me in different years of mine. Today he is my friend, and the most important Man in my life.
My mother is very caring like most mothers. She has selflessly sacrificed her life for the family and i feel very bad when i think of it because with a little more support from the (joint) family she could have fulfilled her dream in terms of having a successful career. My Dad did try to help her get a job but it didnt pan out well so i regret that now that i am a grown up. She didnt let me go out much to play with the kids, till i was like 15 years of age. Most of my cricket was played in school during the games period. I used to hate it that time but now i know their worries when i see little kids smoking cigarettes on street corners and behaving so badly. It was also because of circumstances in Kashmir.
I think my parents gave me freedom in amounts that i could handle at different ages. Today when i look back at years,the discipline, the education, the values, the morals, the sense of love for fellow humans which my parents inculcated in me tells me that i would do grest if i could be half as good as my parents were. I cannot repay them ever, nobody can, but i wish that i give them the joy which they sacrficed when they were busy looking after me.
My dad hardly ever raised a hand on me. Yes he scolded me sometimes as a kid and i did fear it but as i grew up he became milder and milder in his approach. As if he knew the exact extent of control he must have on me in different years of mine. Today he is my friend, and the most important Man in my life.
My mother is very caring like most mothers. She has selflessly sacrificed her life for the family and i feel very bad when i think of it because with a little more support from the (joint) family she could have fulfilled her dream in terms of having a successful career. My Dad did try to help her get a job but it didnt pan out well so i regret that now that i am a grown up. She didnt let me go out much to play with the kids, till i was like 15 years of age. Most of my cricket was played in school during the games period. I used to hate it that time but now i know their worries when i see little kids smoking cigarettes on street corners and behaving so badly. It was also because of circumstances in Kashmir.
I think my parents gave me freedom in amounts that i could handle at different ages. Today when i look back at years,the discipline, the education, the values, the morals, the sense of love for fellow humans which my parents inculcated in me tells me that i would do grest if i could be half as good as my parents were. I cannot repay them ever, nobody can, but i wish that i give them the joy which they sacrficed when they were busy looking after me.
CricketCartoons
Senior T20I Player
- Joined
- Mar 5, 2014
- Runs
- 17,584
One thing in which I will always be better than my parents is not having my kids being raised in poverty.
Syed1
ODI Captain
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2015
- Runs
- 46,041
- Post of the Week
- 3
100% agree
My parents were two different people so that created a lot of issues in the household. So important thing for me would be to find a partner who shares common interests/goals in life so it does not become a problem later. Another thing would be instilling discipline and a winning attitude that's why sports would be of utmost importance.
Syed1
ODI Captain
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2015
- Runs
- 46,041
- Post of the Week
- 3
My dad was/is never completely satisfied with my achievements. I remember one semester I got 4 As and 1 A-, he said good you got 4 As but why did you get A-. I was one-down batsman for my school team, we were playing semi-final of a school tournament while chasing a stiff target I played a good knock and kept the innings together got out in the end and we lost by a close margin, he was like what was the point of all those runs if you couldn't make your team win.
When I was younger this constant lack of praise used to worry and annoy me, but now that I'm a full grown man I realized that my dad had huge expectations from me and he wanted his son to be the best in whatever he got himself into and hence when I fell short of the mark it would not be acceptable to him that his son came second best. This attitude developed a drive in me to achieve far greater than my potential and IA I'll keep doing so.
Parents who praise and reward even minor achievements of their kids go onto nourish average joes who are ok with mediocrity.
When I was younger this constant lack of praise used to worry and annoy me, but now that I'm a full grown man I realized that my dad had huge expectations from me and he wanted his son to be the best in whatever he got himself into and hence when I fell short of the mark it would not be acceptable to him that his son came second best. This attitude developed a drive in me to achieve far greater than my potential and IA I'll keep doing so.
Parents who praise and reward even minor achievements of their kids go onto nourish average joes who are ok with mediocrity.
Abdul
ODI Debutant
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2015
- Runs
- 9,212
Eating what you're served. Just because you're a kid it does not mean that you have to eat everything on your plate.
Suleiman
Test Debutant
- Joined
- Mar 17, 2014
- Runs
- 16,944
- Post of the Week
- 2
Similar experience as you and while it did make me a person who eventually doesn’t care if people praise him or not because I’m my own number one fan and supporter, I think when you’re young your parents need to give you positive reinforcement. Of course they need to tell you when you can do better, but if they are always hard-***** they will either raise a kid who doubts them self too much or I guess in your case spur them on depending on the child’s personality.
hadi123
Test Debutant
- Joined
- Oct 19, 2010
- Runs
- 15,247
- Post of the Week
- 1
I will always listen to them when they're trying to talk to me.
Traveller55
Tape Ball Regular
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2018
- Runs
- 547
No religious brainwashing from early age.
I taught my kids critical thinking and did not introduce religion to them till they were 9-10 years old.
Not surprisingly, neither one of them has high opinion of religion.
I taught my kids critical thinking and did not introduce religion to them till they were 9-10 years old.
Not surprisingly, neither one of them has high opinion of religion.
I have 2 children and we've placed a very significant focus on developing love of Allah in their hearts instead of focusing on simply memorization and/or prayers. Allah had blessed me to sit with scholars from across the Muslim world who had a very comprehensive and moderate understanding of Islam and I want my kids to have a solid understanding in Islamic sciences and theology from an early age.
DeadBall
First Class Captain
- Joined
- Jan 26, 2018
- Runs
- 6,083
Seems like a lot of people had very good parents and childhoods here. As for me I do not want to inflict 100% of what my father did to me on my children and about 90% from my mothers side. I do have a 16 year old step child (who has been with me since she was 6) and she is turning out to be just alright.
chacha kashmiri
ODI Debutant
- Joined
- May 31, 2008
- Runs
- 11,407
- Post of the Week
- 1
1. Not to cheat on their ma
2. Not to make them adverse to advice
3. Not to smoke weed in front of them
4. Being financially stable enough not to educate them just so I can work 12 hours a day instead of 18
2. Not to make them adverse to advice
3. Not to smoke weed in front of them
4. Being financially stable enough not to educate them just so I can work 12 hours a day instead of 18
Abdul
ODI Debutant
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2015
- Runs
- 9,212
Arham_PakFan
ODI Debutant
- Joined
- Nov 10, 2015
- Runs
- 12,858
Will never resort to physical abuse.Never.
I will try my best never to be impatient to them and hear them out.
I’ll teach them that it’s okay if you’re not good at something but that you have to be the best in something that you are good at.
I will also let them choose whatever field they want to pursue.
I will try my best never to be impatient to them and hear them out.
I’ll teach them that it’s okay if you’re not good at something but that you have to be the best in something that you are good at.
I will also let them choose whatever field they want to pursue.
the Great Khan
Senior Test Player
- Joined
- Feb 1, 2005
- Runs
- 27,106
- Post of the Week
- 1
No beats..
Haven't laid a hand on my two kids and there are other ways to show displeasure.
Stability and a clear vision. My parents lacked a clear vision of the future and that's not their fault just the situation we were in. I am aiming to provide a clearer stable vision for my two.
Deen. eliminating the confusion I was brought up with and again not my parents fault. They grew up in an environment where the british had destroyed Islam in their area.
Creating an environment where they can come to me or my wife about social issues e.g. girls or boys etc without one of us going ape..
Giving context to the birds and the bee's conversations.
Discussing issues like online porn and other such things..we need to be honest with our children.
Finally one of the cardinal rules, work hard no regrets, and dont come crying if you failed. Get back up and never surrender..end of..(actually my Dad taught me that so thats just a continuation)
Haven't laid a hand on my two kids and there are other ways to show displeasure.
Stability and a clear vision. My parents lacked a clear vision of the future and that's not their fault just the situation we were in. I am aiming to provide a clearer stable vision for my two.
Deen. eliminating the confusion I was brought up with and again not my parents fault. They grew up in an environment where the british had destroyed Islam in their area.
Creating an environment where they can come to me or my wife about social issues e.g. girls or boys etc without one of us going ape..
Giving context to the birds and the bee's conversations.
Discussing issues like online porn and other such things..we need to be honest with our children.
Finally one of the cardinal rules, work hard no regrets, and dont come crying if you failed. Get back up and never surrender..end of..(actually my Dad taught me that so thats just a continuation)
DeadBall
First Class Captain
- Joined
- Jan 26, 2018
- Runs
- 6,083
How old are you? I imagined you very young.
37 years young.
Cpt. Rishwat
T20I Captain
- Joined
- May 8, 2010
- Runs
- 43,387
Teach them to value money. I wouldn't call it a parenting mistake exactly, I really enjoyed living a swish lifestyle as a kid, but my mum was one of those who spent money like it was going out of fashion. She gave a lot to less well off friends and associates as well, but she could have invested some as well if she had the mindset. Other than that, no complaints.
Abdul
ODI Debutant
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2015
- Runs
- 9,212
Not a parenting mistake, just something I'd do differently. Put them in Martial Arts training at a very young age.
Pakistanian
T20I Debutant
- Joined
- Sep 19, 2016
- Runs
- 6,589
Don't put them in tae kwan do, I was trained in it from age 8 till 13 and it was honestly a waste of time cause it can't help you in a fight , mma is better.
in_cutter
Senior T20I Player
- Joined
- Jan 30, 2005
- Runs
- 17,071
- Post of the Week
- 1
To give them a choice in choosing who they want to marry
UN talkz
First Class Star
- Joined
- Dec 24, 2016
- Runs
- 4,138
In other words, not forcing them to marry with their cousins.
Rayyman
Test Debutant
- Joined
- May 5, 2014
- Runs
- 15,182
I hope my kids see me as a good person first and foremost. And a good father. I know a lot of people that look up to their fathers and I want my kids to be like that.
I personally don't like my dad at all. I do respect him and appreciate what he has done, but just don't see him as good person overall or a good father. Not at all one of my role models. Don't really talk or make conversation with him at all. My little brother is the same way, actually even more so than me. Love my mom though she's awesome.
I feel kind of arrogant talking about this actually. Because there is a good chance that not just me, but most of us grow up and turn out to be fairly bad parents. You just never know what's gonna happen
I personally don't like my dad at all. I do respect him and appreciate what he has done, but just don't see him as good person overall or a good father. Not at all one of my role models. Don't really talk or make conversation with him at all. My little brother is the same way, actually even more so than me. Love my mom though she's awesome.
I feel kind of arrogant talking about this actually. Because there is a good chance that not just me, but most of us grow up and turn out to be fairly bad parents. You just never know what's gonna happen
Pakistanian
T20I Debutant
- Joined
- Sep 19, 2016
- Runs
- 6,589
Arranged marriages go beyond cousin marriages, nobody in my fam marries a relative but moat of them have had arranged marriages. People should let their sons and daughters choose who they marry.
Abdul
ODI Debutant
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2015
- Runs
- 9,212
Why do you say that? Taekwondo is a pretty aggressive sport as far as I know. Genuinely interested to know your reasoning.
Syed1
ODI Captain
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2015
- Runs
- 46,041
- Post of the Week
- 3
Ok.... will you be ok with your son/daughter marrying someone from another race and who is not Muslim?
R3verse Swing
Local Club Star
- Joined
- Jan 8, 2018
- Runs
- 2,163
My parents did the best they could according to their abilities and circumstances. No mistakes.
I realised how hard it is to be a parent when I became one! It's not easy!
The one advise I always give to my children is to earn what you have, and not to spend what you do not have. Save a little for the future, but enjoy life and spend money too! No need to be kanjoos makkhichoose!
Oh and Deen and Amaan is everything.
I realised how hard it is to be a parent when I became one! It's not easy!
The one advise I always give to my children is to earn what you have, and not to spend what you do not have. Save a little for the future, but enjoy life and spend money too! No need to be kanjoos makkhichoose!
Oh and Deen and Amaan is everything.
Not use other kids as examples selectively to make my kids feel inferior.
Not put my kids down in the slightest especially in front of other people.
Make sure my kids feel they can approach me and not fear me from a young age.
Be more present in terms of guidance and direction in all aspects of life.
Not put my kids down in the slightest especially in front of other people.
Make sure my kids feel they can approach me and not fear me from a young age.
Be more present in terms of guidance and direction in all aspects of life.
in_cutter
Senior T20I Player
- Joined
- Jan 30, 2005
- Runs
- 17,071
- Post of the Week
- 1
Muslim of course...but I will not be arranging their marriages, that’s for sure.
Abdul
ODI Debutant
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2015
- Runs
- 9,212
This.
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">teach your sons what no means and teach your daughters how to shoot a gun just in case</p>— Zachary Fox (@zackfox) <a href="https://twitter.com/zackfox/status/911000422113873920?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">September 21, 2017</a></blockquote>
<script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">teach your sons what no means and teach your daughters how to shoot a gun just in case</p>— Zachary Fox (@zackfox) <a href="https://twitter.com/zackfox/status/911000422113873920?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">September 21, 2017</a></blockquote>
<script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>
Similar threads
