Would you and/or your family be fine with marrying a foreigner?

[Dr_Bassim]

I married a Muslim Pakistani girl Alhamdulillah.

The reason being simple.

Stick to what you believe and try to marry among your beliefs.

I would go as far as to say even though I was always fond of Arabic muslim girls, i made a good decision because the language and cultural barrier would have been far too much for me to enjoy my life.

I am satisfied, married for 4 years and inshAllah will ask my daughter to marry a Pakistani man at the end of the day.

 

[Eagle_Eye]

I married a Muslim Pakistani girl Alhamdulillah.

The reason being simple.

Stick to what you believe and try to marry among your beliefs.

I would go as far as to say even though I was always fond of Arabic muslim girls, i made a good decision because the language and cultural barrier would have been far too much for me to enjoy my life.

I am satisfied, married for 4 years and inshAllah will ask my daughter to marry a Pakistani man at the end of the day.

What if she's say no that and wants to marry a black African?

 

[Salma_T]

Majority of the world actually stick to the same ethnicity/background and those marrying outside are rare (becoming a sizable minority). I don't think anyone should dictate who their kids marry I have a son and wouldn't dream of telling him who he should marry. I do believe we are better for the mixing not worse off.

 

[Dr_Bassim]

What if she's say no that and wants to marry a black African?

She doesnt have a choice.

 

[Eagle_Eye]

She doesnt have a choice.

That's a very oppressive and non Islamic position. I am not going to load the question further and make it even more uncomfortable, but how does a highly educated individual like yourself rationalise this stance?

 

[Dr_Bassim]

That's a very oppressive and non Islamic position. I am not going to load the question further and make it even more uncomfortable, but how does a highly educated individual like yourself rationalise this stance?

There is no stance.

She has to marry a Muslim first of all and that is dead certain.

If she wants to marry a black African Muslim I can still consider it.

Non Muslim is out of equation.

End of story.

 

[Eagle_Eye]

There is no stance.

She has to marry a Muslim first of all and that is dead certain.

If she wants to marry a black African Muslim I can still consider it.

Non Muslim is out of equation.

End of story.

I was never going imply a non Muslim. It was either a black African born Muslim or convert (or revert as its fashionably called these days).

 

[Dr_Bassim]

I was never going imply a non Muslim. It was either a black African born Muslim or convert (or revert as its fashionably called these days).

Yeah.

Sorry I should have been clearer about religion.

 

[DeadlyVenom]

I understand what people mean when they say things like love conquers all but I cant relate to it.

My religious and ethnic/cultural identity is what makes me. From culinary tastes to inside jokes to other small details that make up who I am and what I enjoy....all are a product of my religious/cultural identity.

Perhaps I am being narrow minded but I dont think I would have clicked with a Non muslim Non british Non Pakistani.

 

[KingKhanWC]

I understand what people mean when they say things like love conquers all but I cant relate to it.

My religious and ethnic/cultural identity is what makes me. From culinary tastes to inside jokes to other small details that make up who I am and what I enjoy....all are a product of my religious/cultural identity.

Perhaps I am being narrow minded but I dont think I would have clicked with a Non muslim Non british Non Pakistani.

I have a few friends have married English white girls who have converted but mainly for marriage not for belief as such. Such wives cannot connect to the culture entirely and also create a distance between your family.

 

[DeadlyVenom]

I have a few friends have married English white girls who have converted but mainly for marriage not for belief as such. Such wives cannot connect to the culture entirely and also create a distance between your family.

Yeah I have a few in a similar situation. I enjoy my family life too much and would want my future kids to have a full understanding of their cultural heritage to have considered other nationalities.

Modern people will say that a mixture of cultures and identities is always a good thing however seeing a child unable to communicate with his/her grandparents due to a language barrier as a result of growing up in a mixed culture is quite sad.

Two western muslims of different ethnicities will always default to English as their parenting language.

The parent is unable to transmit important cultural details to the child resulting in no clear cultural identity and just confusion.

 

[DeadBall]

She doesnt have a choice.

Good to know you own your daughter, 2 goats seems right in this situation, I suppose.

 

[Dr_Bassim]

Good to know you own your daughter, 2 goats seems right in this situation, I suppose.

I am responsible for my daughter and yes I own her till she is at least of age and then in some matters more.

Would you let your daughter drink till it kills her because its her choice?

Nice to know that as well if you would.

 

[Cpt. Rishwat]

Yeah I have a few in a similar situation. I enjoy my family life too much and would want my future kids to have a full understanding of their cultural heritage to have considered other nationalities.

Modern people will say that a mixture of cultures and identities is always a good thing however seeing a child unable to communicate with his/her grandparents due to a language barrier as a result of growing up in a mixed culture is quite sad.

Two western muslims of different ethnicities will always default to English as their parenting language.

The parent is unable to transmit important cultural details to the child resulting in no clear cultural identity and just confusion.

Two western Muslims defaulting to English as their parenting language is inevitable anyway, not to mention only natural when they are living in England. You can cling onto cultural norms from previous generations who were raised on another continent for only so long before it becomes out of place and unsustainable. What those parents would have in common is religion, you don't need to speak a foreign language to instil that, assuming you want to.

 

[Salma_T]

My nephews and neices with parents of Pakistani origin don't speak the language but understand it just like the mixed nephews. My son doesn't speak or understand anything due to not living overseas and being the only urdu/potwari speaker. We always say to mum your children never taught you English but your grandchildren have.