Ten of the best (or worst) sledges

Dr Khan

First Class Player
Jan 17, 2010
Funny and very interesting. Enjoy

Rod Marsh and Ian Botham:
When Botham took guard in an Ashes match, Marsh welcomed him with: “So how’s your wife and my kids?” to which Botham shot back: “The wife’s fine, but the kids are ********.”

South Africa batsman Daryll Cullinan and Aussie spin wizard Shane Warne:
As Cullinan was on his way to the wicket, Warne told him he had been waiting two years for another chance to humiliate him. “Looks like you spent it eating,” Cullinan retorted.

Robin Smith of England and Australian fast bowler Merv Hughes:
Hughes said to Smith after he played and missed: “You can’t ******* bat”. Smith to Hughes after he smacked him to the boundary: “Hey Merv, we make a fine pair. I can’t ******* bat and you can’t ******* bowl.”

Hughes and Pakistan’s Javed Miandad:
Javed called Hughes a fat bus conductor. A few balls later Hughes dismissed the Pakistan star: “Tickets please”, said Hughes as he ran past the departing batsman.

England’s James Ormond had just come out to bat and was greeted by Mark Waugh:
Waugh from the slips: “What are you doing out here? There’s no way you’re good enough to play for England.” Ormond: “Maybe not, but at least I’m the best player in my family.”

Warne and Sri Lanka skipper Arjuna Ranatunga:
Wicketkeeper Ian Healy believed he knew a way of tempting the portly Ranatunga out of his crease – “Put a Mars Bar on a good length. That should do it.”

England captain Douglas Jardine and Australian counterpart Bill Woodfull during the notorious Bodyline series:
After Jardine complained that one of the Australian players called him a b******. Woodfull turned to his team, pointed to Jardine and asked: “Which one of you b******* called this b****** a b******?”

Sunil Gavaskar of India and West Indies’ Viv Richards:
Gavaskar, normally an opener, had decided to bat at number four, but Malcolm Marshall dismissed Anshuman Gaekwad and Dilip Vengsarkar for ducks, setting the stage for Gavaskar to walk in at 0-2. Richards said: “Man, it don’t matter where you come in to bat, the score is still zero.”

Richards and England fast bowler Greg Thomas:
Thomas: (Describing the ball) “It’s red, round and weighs about five ounces, in case you were wondering.” Richards: (Having smacked said ball out of the ground) “You know what it looks like, now you go and find it.”

Slight variation to the botham /marsh one.

Bothams reply was "My wife is fine, Your kids are retarded"
The one between Sarwan and McGrath was just fantastic, loved the way McGrath threw his toys out of his pram
Why does EVERY single article written about sledging need to have the same old sledges that everybody has heard about before in it.. :facepalm:
Posted a bazillion times. I wish broadcasters allowed the stump mics to be turned up so we could hear some more gems.
Posted a bazillion times. I wish broadcasters allowed the stump mics to be turned up so we could hear some more gems.

This! Is there any genuine reason why stump mics are turned down so low? I'd personally prefer hearing the on-field banter as opposed to generic crowd noise all the time.
the source is an indian bollywood related site as the OP hasn't mentionned it
Are these the best cricket sledges of all time?

Uncomfortable with the amount of Ashes sledging, England coach Trevor Bayliss wants verbal exchanges censored from television viewers.

Bayliss is concerned the verbal clashes between his players and Australia is overshadowing the cricket.

Bayliss iss worried about the impact that sledging heard via stump microphones would have on children watching and hearing it on television.

"I would like to see the microphones turned down," he said.

"I don't think that is necessarily a great thing for young kids at home watching.

"It adds to the spectacle when you hear playing the game.

"But I don't think anyone necessarily actually has to listen to what is being said."

Sledging doesn't have to be nasty, and can involve some sharp wit.

When former Australia bowler Merv Hughes tangled with Pakistan's Javed Miandad, it resulted in one of the best lines in cricket.

Miandad: "Merv you are a big, fat bus conductor."

Hughes, after dismissing Miandad, responded with: "Tickets please."

Here are five more of the funnier cases.

Fred Trueman

The English fast bowler found the edge of a bat, only for the ball to fly between team mate Raman Subba Row's legs. When Row apologised and said he should have kept his legs together, Fiery Fred replied: "So should your mother".

Daryll Cullinan

Fun-living Aussie bowler Shane Warne had great success against South African batsman Cullinan. After a gap in their rivalry, Warne greeted Cullinan by saying: "I've been waiting two years for another chance at you". Cullinan replied: "Looks like you spent it eating."

Merv Hughes

The Aussie fast bowler had English batsman Robin Smith in all sorts of trouble, but couldn't get an edge. Hughes told Smith: "If you turn the bat over you'll get the instructions mate".

Hughes, again

England's Graham Gooch was struggling against the Aussie quick bowler. Hughes enquired: "Would you like me to bowl a piano and see if you can play that?"

Steve Waugh

In a domestic Sheffield Shield match, Australian legend Waugh was pottering about at the crease a little too slowly for Jamie Siddons' liking. "For !@#$ sake, it's not a !@#$%^ test match," Siddons exclaimed. Waugh replied: "Of course it's not...you're here."

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The best one has to be McGrath's wife giving out biscuits. It was legendary. :))
Steyn telling Rohit that he has more runs than him in the series was pretty funny.
Akhtar bowling bouncers to sehwag, and sehwag continously leaving it, frustrated Akhtar needling sehwag to try and hitting it to which sehwag replied "tu bowling Kar rha hai hi bheekh maang rha hai" even pak players chuckled at this.
Greatest Cricket Sledges Ever

Greatest Cricket Sledges Ever

Malcolm Marshall & David Boon.
Malcolm Marshall was bowling to David Boon, who was having a bit of trouble against the fast bowler and had played and missed a few times. Marshall : "Now David, are you going to get out or am I going to have to come round the wicket and kill you?".

Merv Hughes & Graham Gooch.
Merv Hughes was all over Gooch in one test and proceeded to say: "Would you like me to bowl a piano and see if you can play that".

Rod Marsh & Ian Botham.
In an Ashes match Botham arrived at the wicket to a bit of cheek from the Aussie keeper. Marsh : "So how's your wife and my kid's?". Botham: "Wife's fine. Kid's are ********".

Robin Smith & Merv Hughes.
In the 1989 Ashes series Big Merv was giving Smith a few problems. After playing and missing a Merv delivery, Big Merv snapped: "You can't ****ing bat". Next ball Smith proceeded to belt Hughes to the fence for four runs and replied: "Hey Merv! We make a good pair. I can't ****ing bat and you can't fu**ng bowl!".

Merv Hughes & Javed Miandad.
During a test between Pakistan and Australia in 1991 Miandad tried to sledge Merv: "Merv you are a big, fat bus conductor". Only a few balls later Merv dismissed Miandad, ran past him and shouted: "Tickets please!".

Ian Healy & Arjuna Ranatunga.
The Australians were getting frustrated while trying to get the wicket of the portly Arjuna Ranatunga of Sri Lanka. Various tactics were tried and failed until Healy came up with a winner: "Put a Mars Bar on a good length and that should do it!".

Herschelle Gibbs & Steve Waugh.
In the 1999 World Cup Australia needed to beat South Africa to keep their tournament hopes alive. Steve Waugh was on 56* and leading Aus to victory when he gifted Gibbs a simple catch. Gibbs went to celebrate the catch but instead dropped it, leaving Waugh to retort: "You've just dropped the World Cup". He was right too, Aussie went on to win the game and the tournament, knocking out South Africa in the process.

Merv Hughes & Viv Richards.
During a test match in Jamaica, Hughes continued to stare at Richards after each delivery. He never spoke a word but sure enough after every delivery there was a stare. Viv Richards: "Don't you be staring at me, man. This is my island, my culture. And in my culture we just bowl". Hughes replied with a ripper : "In my culture we just say f**k off".

Mark Waugh & Adam Parore.
Waugh: "I remember you from a couple of years ago. You were **** then and you're ****en useless now!". To which Parore replied: "Yeah that's me. And I remember you were dating that old, ugly sl*t. I see you've married her now. You dumb ****".

Merv Hughes & Robin Smith.
Merv was bowling a few crackers that Smith couldn't even get an edge to. Merv: "If you turn the bat over you'll get the instructions mate".

Jamie Siddons & Steve Waugh.
In a Sheffield Shield match Steve Waugh was taking his time getting ready to face his first ball. Taking guard, scratching out his mark, looking at the field settings. Jamie Siddons decided enough was enough and remarked: "For f**k's sake, mate, it's not a f*cken test match!". To which Waugh replied: "Of course it's not... You're here".

Ian Healy & Arjuna Ranatunga.
During a One-dayer between Australia and Sri Lanka Ranatunga decided he needed a runner. The stump microphone then picked up the following sledge from Healy: "You don't get a runner for being an overweight, fat cu*t".

Glenn McGrath & Ramnaresh Sarwan.
Surprised this didn't rank higher. Shortly after McGrath's wife had been diagnosed with breast cancer, the Australians were playing a test match against the West Indies. McGrath: "What does Brian Lara's dick taste like?". Sarwan: "Why don't you ask your wife?". McGrath then lost the plot: "If you ever mention my wife again, I'll fu*ken rip your fu*ken throat out".

Fred Trueman.
An Australian batsman was walking onto the field, opened the gate and before he could shut it, Trueman remarked: "Don't bother shutting it, son, you won't be there long enough".

Ravi Shastri & Mike Whitney.
Mike Whitney was on the field as a sub fielder while Shastri was batting. Shastri hits the ball to Whitney and contemplates a single. Whitney throws the ball in and says: "Stay in your crease or I'll break your fu*ken head". Shastri replies: "If you could bowl as well as you talk you wouldn't be the fu*ken 12th man!".

Daryll Cullinan & Shane Warne.
Cullinan was well known as being a bit of a bunny to Warne's bowling. The 2 hadn't played each other in some time so when Cullinan walked out to bat, Warne couldn't resist heckling him: "I've been waiting two years for another chance at you". Cullinan got him back with a ripper: "Looks like you spent it eating..."

Sunil Gavaskar & Viv Richards.
In one test between the West Indians and the Indians Sunil Gavaskar decided to drop down to no.4 from his usual opening position. Malcolm Marshall then proceeded to dismiss Gaekwad and Vengsarkar for no score. When Gavaskar came out to bat Richards said: "Man it don't matter where you come in, the score is still zero!"

Fred Trueman & Raman Subba Row.
Fred Trueman was bowling and got an edge from the batsman which went between Row's legs, who was fielding at slip. At the end of the over, Row runs over to Trueman and says: "Sorry Fred, I should've kept my legs closed". Trueman: "So should your mother".

Mark Waugh & James Ormond.
James Ormond came out to bat in a match with Australia. Mark Waugh, at slip, let rip: "What are you doing out here? You're too sh*t to play for England!" Ormond replied: "Maybe so, but at least I'm the best player in my family".

Viv Richards & Greg Thomas.
In a county match in England, Thomas was bowling to Richards and getting a few to whizz past the bat. After Richards played and missed another one, Thomas said: "It's red, it's round. Now fu*ken hit it!". This obviously angered Richards who proceeded to hit the next ball out of the ground. Richards: "You know what it looks like now go and get it."

Shane Warne and Darren Berry to Michael Slater

Warne, not shying away from sledging a fellow team mate during a state game, decided to get under Slater’s skin by suggesting that his temper was like a time-bomb.

When Slater came out to bat, Warne and Berry began the sledging:

Warne “Tick”

Berry “Tock”

Warne “Tick”

Berry “Tock”

After several overs, Slater got impatient and holed out to deep midwicket. As he trudged off, he glared at Warne and Berry, who said in unison “Kaboom!”