Why are men allowed four wives in Islam?

[Saj]

ok forget the financial implications or the logistics of it, this thread is about why are Muslim men allowed to 4 wives - can someone explain why ?

 

[Mohsin]

Isn't it something to do with the man to woman ratio? If there's a war for example and there are less men in the area (kind of thing)...

 

[siddharth]

Geez ,4 wives.The mere thought bringing nightmares .

For the topic ,i read it that it is to protect widows of those who die in War .However people will interpret the way they want .Ex;

 

[Mohsin]

Geez ,4 wives.The mere thought bringing nightmares .

For the topic ,i read it that it is to protect widows of those who die in War .However people will interpret the way they want .Ex;

What would this do?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/7547148.stm

 

[Obeid]

A man can only have upto 4 wives IF he treats and loves them all equally can provide for ALL of them financially and a bunch of other things which many men in todays age can not do. I dont know much about the topic but I believe it was at the prophets time and there was a battle where several men died leaving orphans and widows. Now in Arabian CULTURE back then, orphans and widows were looked down upon and were not treated properly. In fact the Prophet himself was an orphan and he knew exactly how bad and poorly they were treated. To prevent seeing poor orphans on the street, the prophet urged men that if they were able to, they sould have multiple wives. Im not sure if Im right on this so please correct me if I am wrong.

 

[BD-fan]

Mashallah Saj wants more than 4. Have to give it to you, I can only handle one's whinning. 4 or more is unthinkable.

 

[BD-fan]

As far as I know, one must have permission from the 1st wife before he can get the second. 1st and 2nd before getting a 3rd. so on so forth. This is to keep harmony in the family.

Secondly, the person must treat wifes equally. I don't think this is possible. Do the extent if you give a wife a book as a gift, you have to give the same book to your other wives.

Clearly, the second binds us to stick with one wife only cause we can't treat two person equally.

 

[mamoo gogo]

As far as I know, one must have permission from the 1st wife before he can get the second. 1st and 2nd before getting a 3rd. so on so forth. This is to keep harmony in the family.

No permission is necessary. It's only Pakistani law which requires permission.

 

[Somali Pirate]

What if your current wife is terminally il and you could'nt support her by yourself? What if she can't give birth to anyone? What if you lived in an era or place where there are too many poor women who have no one to look after them?

What if your were bor.... sorry scratch that!

 

[Momo]

No permission is necessary. It's only Pakistani law which requires permission.

True.

 

[6xafridi]

ok let me tell u guys the truth

if every women and man were married
there are more women than men
so in order for everyone to get married, man can marry more than 1 person

understand bhai jaan?

 

[Toony™®]

i bet it is to do with make infidelity legal.

 

[mamoo gogo]

Can we merge this thread with the Jihad thread?

 

[PlanetPakistan]

A man can only have upto 4 wives IF he treats and loves them all equally can provide for ALL of them financially and a bunch of other things which many men in todays age can not do. I dont know much about the topic but I believe it was at the prophets time and there was a battle where several men died leaving orphans and widows. Now in Arabian CULTURE back then, orphans and widows were looked down upon and were not treated properly. In fact the Prophet himself was an orphan and he knew exactly how bad and poorly they were treated. To prevent seeing poor orphans on the street, the prophet urged men that if they were able to, they sould have multiple wives. Im not sure if Im right on this so please correct me if I am wrong.

Even today there are millions of more women than men.

 

[tmac4real]

Even today there are millions of more women than men.

then how come u can't find one?

 

[PlanetPakistan]

then how come u can't find one?

ouch....low blow.
I am only 21 i don't need women in my life yet and when i make up my mind i won't just score a single i will actually hit a beautiful cover drive for four

 

[Zeenix]

Allowed doesn't mean, its an article of faith or compulsion..

 

[Zeenix]

ouch....low blow.
I am only 21 i don't need women in my life yet and when i make up my mind i won't just score a single i will actually hit a beautiful cover drive for four

Now that's known as wishful thinking.

 

[PlanetPakistan]

Now that's known as wishful thinking.

wishful thinking?

hope you are not questioning my cover driving skills because here in Orlando the pitches are quite flat.

 

[Zeenix]

wishful thinking?

hope you are not questioning my cover driving skills because here in Orlando the pitches are quite flat.

Well a low quality bat will always let you down. Array yaar kia kur rahe ho.. Hamain kin batoon mai laga rahe ho. Abhi tu Roze start huwa hai.

 

[Oxy]

I think I would consider a 2nd wife.

18 years younger preferably

 

[MIG]

I think I would consider a 2nd wife.

18 years younger preferably

Ah the classic posting in the wrong site problem.

Oxy had ShaadiKhanaBarbadi.com window open as well but typed his requirements in the wrong window....

 

[tmac4real]

ouch....low blow.
I am only 21 i don't need women in my life yet and when i make up my mind i won't just score a single i will actually hit a beautiful cover drive for four

so you want to be like Shahid afridi. Fail 99 innings, go berserk in one .

 

[PlanetPakistan]

so you want to be like Shahid afridi. Fail 99 innings, go berserk in one .

No, i will just have a late start to my career like

 

[Savak]

Hmm. Its very tempting to say to enjoy the best of 4 worlds.

But hell no. 1 is a huge hassle and we are talking about 4 here. What crap. Should be disallowed in society in my view.

 

[Keith]

One is enough for me thanx!!! I can understand how a guy can love many woman BUT i cannot understand how you can be IN LOVE with more than 1? There is a huge difference.

 

[lakha84]

islam set a restriction that marry only upto four wives in christianity or any other religion there is no limit but i guess its their culture only marry 1

 

[Easa]

I'll be blunt - it's crap.

 

[Keith]

My country's laws prevent me from taking more than 1 wife at a time. I feel that this is correct, for me anyway.

 

[Ace Base]

I had so much fun the first time I got married I decided to do it again.

 

[Rudi hater]

No permission is necessary. It's only Pakistani law which requires permission.

Thats right in Islam there is no need for permission but the country law. However, if you follow islamic law then country law is only secondary (Islamic countries) unless woman file a case.

 

[lakha84]

anyone who can afford more than one wive or may be handle i salute you

 

[Rudi hater]

My country's laws prevent me from taking more than 1 wife at a time. I feel that this is correct, for me anyway.

Kieth how about taking a mistress as they do in rest of western world.

 

[Rudi hater]

anyone who can afford more than one wive or may be handle i salute you

) ) )

 

[lakha84]

No permission is necessary. It's only Pakistani law which requires permission.

nope as far asi know permission is required from the wifey

 

[Keith]

Kieth how about taking a mistress as they do in rest of western world.

That would indicate that you do not love your wife! I love mine so that is not an option that i would even vaguely consider!!

Fortunately i am in a fortunate part of the world where i do not come from the east nor do i come from the west!!

Seriously though, cheating on 1's spouse is evil.

 

[Rudi hater]

That would indicate that you do not love your wife! I love mine so that is not an option that i would even vaguely consider!!

Fortunately i am in a fortunate part of the world where i do not come from the east nor do i come from the west!!

Seriously though, cheating on 1's spouse is evil.

I can give you example where men display their mistress proudly and yet say they love their wives. I am talking alot of rich guys.

 

[Rudi hater]

nope as far asi know permission is required from the wifey

Not in Islam.

 

[Keith]

I can give you example where men display their mistress proudly and yet say they love their wives. I am talking alot of rich guys.

No need to give examples mate. Have seen plenty myself!! NOT for me though. I married my wife because i loved her then and i love her even more now. I, for 1, respect the vows i made to my wife and more importantly i respect her as a woman first. No woman deserves to be disrespected in any way or manner. My mother was a woman long before she was my mother and i will never disrespect her, that is how women should be treated.

 

[Saqlain_doosra]

Not in Islam.

I heard you have to ask your wife before marrying another.

 

[MIG]

I heard you have to ask your wife before marrying another.

The only condition is that the Marriage must be announced in public so its not a secret.

The bit about permission is something that was done in Pakistan on the instance of Begum Rana Liaqat Ali Khan - no Islamic basis.

Obviously, if the other wife is unhappy, she can ask for unconditional divorce (khula) at any point.

 

[Rudi hater]

I heard you have to ask your wife before marrying another.

May be as a good gesture sort of thing but not neccessary.

 

[Zeenix]

I heard you have to ask your wife before marrying another.

Only in Pakistan's Muslim Family Act. Otherwise in Islam there's no need to ask for permission. Likewise as MIG said a women is free to file for divorce if she is unhappy.

 

[Momo]

MYTHS ABOUT ISLAMIC POLYGAMY

Myth #1: Islam increased the allowable number of wives (that a man can have simultaneously) to four.
Truth: Islam restricted men to have four, or less wives at one time. Before islam, in the history of the world, there was no limit to the number imposed by any religion. In fact when islam introduced this restiction, many people had more than four wives, and so they divorced some of their wives to conform to the restriction.

Myth #2: Islam encourages polygamy.
Truth: Qur'an is the only religious book that has words "marry only one" (Al-Qur'an 4:3) [1].

Myth #3: Islam allows polygamy just for the heck of it.
Truth: The pertinent verses (Al-Qur'an 4:3-4) [1] were revealed after the battle of Uhud [2], when seventy muslims were killed, and the issue of safeguarding of the rights of their orphans arose in many families at Madina. That's why Allah orders muslims not to wrong those orphans, and take care of them. In case they can't do that, then they should marry their mothers (up to a maximum of four), and then take care of those orphans (as their own kids). But if they fear they can't do justice to multiple wives, they should just marry one.

Now I am of course not implying that this verse was valid only for that time, or is abrogated (no verse of Qur'an is abrogated), or even, polygamy is valid only when similar circumstances (many men dying in warfare etc) arrise. This verse is valid in all circumstances including the above (men dying as a result of wars etc), when women for some reason find it hard to find good husbands. Since a man is responsible for taking care of the woman (financially and in all other ways) instead of the other way around, if in a society many men are not capable of doing that (not very far-fetched in today's societies), polygamy is a very valid solution. Other such situations are not hard to imagine either. Islam can cope with all those situations, when all other man-made systems will fail.

Will reiterate though, that this system is in place for a very practical and beautiful reason, and is not there to satisfy men's sexual appetite.

Myth #4: Females are exploited and are at a disadvantage (as a result of polygamy in islam).
Truth: Nothing could be further from the truth. Where a man has no way to know beforehand, how his wife will behave after marriage (Alhamdulillah islam is against living under the same roof for years and "getting to know your future spouse" before making up your mind to marry him/her or not), a woman (who is going to be a second or third bride of a man) is in a fortunate position. She can find out how he treats his previuos wives, and the chances are that if he is a good husband to those, he will be a good husband to her too. So the blind element of marriage is reduced to a great degree.

Myth #5: Polygamy gives a man the easy way out (to satisfy his lust).
Truth: The "westerner" is very fond of this line of thought. Aren't you satisfied with one spouse, he asks. And he boasts that because he selected the very best the first time around, he never feels tempted to even think of any other woman. Very noble thoughts, these. But the reality is a bit uglier than that, I am afraid. Allah made men and women, and He knows how women are what the man covets most [3]. He knows that man will at times fall in love with a woman (even when he is married already), and because islam is strongly against illegal sexual relations, Allah has ordered such men to refrain from all immoral acts, and take the woman's hand in a respectable and honourable way (taking full responsibility for her well-being, her previous children if any, and any future children between them). So far from being the easy way out (having her as a mistress with zero responsibility), Allah has made it tougher for man (you can only have her if you take full responsibility).

References:

[1] Translation of Al-Qur'an (Chapter 4: An-Nisa)

4.2: And give to the orphans their property, and do not substitute worthless (things) for (their) good (ones), and do not devour their property (as an addition) to your own property; this is surely a great crime.

4.3: And if you fear that you cannot act equitably towards orphans, then marry such women as seem good to you, two and three and four; but if you fear that you will not do justice (between them), then (marry) only one or what your right hands possess; this is more proper, that you may not deviate from the right course.

[2] Maulana Maududi's Introduction to An-Nisa
http://www.usc.edu/dept/MSA/quran/maududi/mau4.html

[3] Al-Qur'an (3:14)
Fair in the eyes of men is the love of things they covet: Women and sons; Heaped-up hoards of gold and silver; horses branded (for blood and excellence); and (wealth of) cattle and well-tilled land. Such are the possessions of this world's life; but in nearness to Allah is the best of the goals (To return to).

I have tried my best to be objective and convey what I know honestly. But I may have made many mistakes, for which I ask for Allah's forgiveness. And Allah knows best!

 

[Oxy]

So your saying I dont have to tell my wife?

Subhanallah!

 

[siddharth]

So your saying I dont have to tell my wife?

Subhanallah!

what happened oxy ?

 

[Saqlain_doosra]

Only in Pakistan's Muslim Family Act. Otherwise in Islam there's no need to ask for permission. Likewise as MIG said a women is free to file for divorce if she is unhappy.

Didn't know that. In our families its no no unless they don't have kids.

 

[siddharth]

One is enough for me thanx!!! I can understand how a guy can love many woman BUT i cannot understand how you can be IN LOVE with more than 1? There is a huge difference.

That depends how u define ''Love '' .Many men don't know the difference between love and lust .

 

[Rodriguez]

Myth #5: Polygamy gives a man the easy way out (to satisfy his lust).
Truth: The "westerner" is very fond of this line of thought. Aren't you satisfied with one spouse, he asks. And he boasts that because he selected the very best the first time around, he never feels tempted to even think of any other woman. Very noble thoughts, these. But the reality is a bit uglier than that, I am afraid. Allah made men and women, and He knows how women are what the man covets most [3]. He knows that man will at times fall in love with a woman (even when he is married already), and because islam is strongly against illegal sexual relations, Allah has ordered such men to refrain from all immoral acts, and take the woman's hand in a respectable and honourable way (taking full responsibility for her well-being, her previous children if any, and any future children between them). So far from being the easy way out (having her as a mistress with zero responsibility), Allah has made it tougher for man (you can only have her if you take full responsibility).

Why did Allah make men such horny ********? Why didn't he create man and woman with equal temparaments?

Why does He not encourage instead the concept of self control and teach men that they should ignore their stupid fancies and desires because they eventually go away (I know this from experience.)

I know that women like to look beautiful and whatnot but must have self control and be modest about themselves so why can't men have some self control too in this respect (the multiple wives thing.)

Anyway, it's like I always said. Islam is a very pro-male religion. Yeah, there's a thing or two about protecting some of the rights of women but the rights of men far outweigh the rights of women whatever anyone says.

 

[mumtaz]

Why did Allah make men such horny ********? Why didn't he create man and woman with equal temparaments?

Why does He not encourage instead the concept of self control and teach men that they should ignore their stupid fancies and desires because they eventually go away (I know this from experience.)

I know that women like to look beautiful and whatnot but must have self control and be modest about themselves so why can't men have some self control too in this respect (the multiple wives thing.)

Anyway, it's like I always said. Islam is a very pro-male religion. Yeah, there's a thing or two about protecting some of the rights of women but the rights of men far outweigh the rights of women whatever anyone says.

You are not allowed to marry more than once to satisfy your lust. I think Momo got that one wrong. The correct way of looking at the whole issue is that Islam did not prohibit multiple marriages and a prohibition from Quran would have been for all times to come and all circumstances. There could be times when multiple marriages are required like the one described in the Quran. If an Islamic state feels that there is no need for multiple marriages or such an allowance is being abused, then it can legislate and disallow it for that particular time.

 

[Momo]

You are not allowed to marry more than once to satisfy your lust. I think Momo got that one wrong. The correct way of looking at the whole issue is that Islam did not prohibit multiple marriages and a prohibition from Quran would have been for all times to come and all circumstances. There could be times when multiple marriages are required like the one described in the Quran. If an Islamic state feels that there is no need for multiple marriages or such an allowance is being abused, then it can legislate and disallow it for that particular time.

Please read Myth #3 in post #47.

 

[Momo]

Why did Allah make men such horny ********? Why didn't he create man and woman with equal temparaments?

Indeed. Why didn't he create all of us with the same skin colour? And why all our fingers have different lengths? And why some of us are rich, others poor? Why do we all think so differently? And above all, why did Allah create disease, death, difficulties, greed and hunger? Why didn't he create mankind all nice and gentlemanly, with no temptations and no going astray? Would have been great that way. And why is it so that oceans get so much rain while the deserts not nearly enough? Very poor design of the universe, I say.

Why does He not encourage instead the concept of self control and teach men that they should ignore their stupid fancies and desires because they eventually go away (I know this from experience.)

You are sure He does not encourage self-control?

I know that women like to look beautiful and whatnot but must have self control and be modest about themselves so why can't men have some self control too in this respect (the multiple wives thing.)

The multiple wife thing is not about uncontrolled lust. Read Myth #3 in post #47.

Anyway, it's like I always said. Islam is a very pro-male religion. Yeah, there's a thing or two about protecting some of the rights of women but the rights of men far outweigh the rights of women whatever anyone says.

Any evidence to back this claim up?

 

[pak4life]

the permission was give at a time when there was war and poverty and if a women become a widow she could be taken as a second, third, or forth wife.

there is no need to have more then one wife in this day and age having a second wife just for the sake of it is wrong.

 

[pakistani_banda]

ouch....low blow.
I am only 21 i don't need women in my life yet and when i make up my mind i won't just score a single i will actually hit a beautiful cover drive for four

why not hit a six instead

 

[mumtaz]

Please read Myth #3 in post #47.

Well, agree entirely with that but when you write in Myth # 5 that "reality is a bit uglier than that" and "He knows that man will at times fall in love with a woman (even when he is married already)", I would have to disagree.

A woman can also at times fall in love with another man (even when she is married already), what do you do in that case?

What if the man who has fallen in love again doesn't have the financial means to support another wife. What is the solution then?

The way I see it is that the reasons for not prohibiting polygamy are other ones which you and others have already outlined. This is something you absolutely cannot present as a reason. Men and women, when they are married are both supposed to look towards each other for comfort and satisfaction. If they like someone else while they are married, then they are supposed to absolutely control their desires and polygamy is not a solution. In fact, if a man marries a second time for this reason, I would consider it a big sin.

 

[Momo]

Well, agree entirely with that but when you write in Myth # 5 that "reality is a bit uglier than that" and "He knows that man will at times fall in love with a woman (even when he is married already)", I would have to disagree.

By the "reality is a bit uglier than that" comment, I was referring to those people who make fun of polygamy in islam on the grounds that they are content with their only wife, and why can't muslims be. But then they get caught with a prostitute, or get their love-nest discovered.

Man by his nature can love more than one woman simultaneously. Notice my use of the word can. I am not implying that every man necessarily does that; only saying that he can. And islam does not pretend that he cannot. So it provides a solution for the few such cases. And such cases are quite rare (personally I know only one man who has more than one wife).

A woman can also at times fall in love with another man (even when she is married already), what do you do in that case?

Women are different from men. While a man can love two women at the same time, a woman by nature is a one-man creature. True, she can fall in love with another man while married, but then she does not love her husband any more. If you don't take my word for it, ask any woman that you know, whether she can love (romantically) two men at the same time.

So, if a woman does fall in love with a man other than her husband, she should leave her husband and get married to him.

What if the man who has fallen in love again doesn't have the financial means to support another wife. What is the solution then?

In that case, he is not allowed to contemplate a second marriage. Illegal sex is of course out of question in islam. So it means he should forget about her.

 

[mumtaz]

By the "reality is a bit uglier than that" comment, I was referring to those people who make fun of polygamy in islam on the grounds that they are content with their only wife, and why can't muslims be. But then they get caught with a prostitute, or get their love-nest discovered.

Man by his nature can love more than one woman simultaneously. Notice my use of the word can. I am not implying that every man necessarily does that; only saying that he can. And islam does not pretend that he cannot. So it provides a solution for the few such cases. And such cases are quite rare (personally I know only one man who has more than one wife).

Women are different from men. While a man can love two women at the same time, a woman by nature is a one-man creature. True, she can fall in love with another man while married, but then she does not love her husband any more. If you don't take my word for it, ask any woman that you know, whether she can love (romantically) two men at the same time.

So, if a woman does fall in love with a man other than her husband, she should leave her husband and get married to him.

In that case, he is not allowed to contemplate a second marriage. Illegal sex is of course out of question in islam. So it means he should forget about her.

Well, is Islam a pro-rich religion then?

Talking of nature, you would also have to acknowledge that its a woman's nature not to like (absolutely abhor, in fact) sharing her husband with another woman. So, while Islam (what you think!) takes into account a man's nature (that he can love more than one woman at the same time), it conveniently forgets about the woman's nature which brings us to the same question: Is Islam a pro-male religion?

 

[Momo]

mumtaz, let me repeat one more time that islam does not prefer polygamy. It recommends a man to marry one woman (as a rule). But it allows polygamy under strict conditions (read post #47 again). And let me reiterate that I am not a spokesman for polygamy (I am happily married - with only one wife - and no plans for another marriage whatsoever) any more than islam is a flag-bearer of polygamy.

Having said that, the islamic polygamy makes all the sense in the world, and I feel obliged to defend it if the wisdom behind it is challenged. Remember that islam does not order it, only allows it for certain (valid) reasons, that too if strict conditions are adhered to.

Having that out of the way, let me address your questions:

Well, is Islam a pro-rich religion then?

Let's be accurate here. Your oiginal question had nothing to do with being rich. It asked:

What if the man who has fallen in love again doesn't have the financial means to support another wife. What is the solution then?

There's a difference between being able to support another wife, and being rich. No islam is not pro-rich. But it is very particular about the condition that a man must be able to support his wife financially. Makes all the sense in the world, doesn't it? Would you advise a man to marry when he obviously cannot support his future wife?

Talking of nature, you would also have to acknowledge that its a woman's nature not to like (absolutely abhor, in fact) sharing her husband with another woman. So, while Islam (what you think!) takes into account a man's nature (that he can love more than one woman at the same time), it conveniently forgets about the woman's nature

Not necessarily. In Indo-Pak, yes, they do dislike it. But not in say Middle East. So if it is location dependent, it is safe to claim that it is not a woman's nature, but a result of cultural background and upbringing.

which brings us to the same question: Is Islam a pro-male religion?

Absolutely not. Islam is not pro-anything. It is a balanced way of life. And the reason it is so balanced is that the Creator of men and women designed it.

I would argue that women are given a slightly preferential treatment here. Consider this:
If a man falls in love with a woman, and finds out that she is already married, he is supposed to not even think about her any more, because she is unavailable. If, on the other hand, a woman fancies a man as her husband, and that man is already married, she can still propose him (yes women have a right to propose). She is in a more flexible situation, if you know what I mean.

 

[mumtaz]

Momo, I dont know if you have realized or not but I have also defended Islamic polygamy for most of the same reasons that you have except this one. This, to me, makes absolutely no sense not least of all because this is not mentioned in either the Quran or any of the authentic Hadiths.

I think I have sufficiently shown the flaws in your argument. My contention is that Islam cannot be pro-anything. When you say that a man is allowed to marry more than once just because he loves more than one woman and he can support two wives financially without even needing to inquire about the sensibilities of his first wife, then that in reality is showing Islam to be a pro-male, pro-rich religion. Since, to me, Islam, by definition, cannot be pro-anything, then the only explanation is that your argument must be wrong.

Lets let the others who read this thread decide who is right here, otherwise it would turn into one of those endless Wazeeri-xyz debates if you know what I mean . Sorry Wazeeri!

 

[Momo]

Momo, I dont know if you have realized or not but I have also defended Islamic polygamy for most of the same reasons that you have except this one. This, to me, makes absolutely no sense not least of all because this is not mentioned in either the Quran or any of the authentic Hadiths.

I think I have sufficiently shown the flaws in your argument. My contention is that Islam cannot be pro-anything. When you say that a man is allowed to marry more than once just because he loves more than one woman and he can support two wives financially without even needing to inquire about the sensibilities of his first wife, then that in reality is showing Islam to be a pro-male, pro-rich religion. Since, to me, Islam, by definition, cannot be pro-anything, then the only explanation is that your argument must be wrong.

Lets let the others who read this thread decide who is right here, otherwise it would turn into one of those endless Wazeeri-xyz debates if you know what I mean . Sorry Wazeeri!

) Fair call.

I completely understand your position, mumtaz. And yes, I realize that you and I agree on about 80% of this issue. Was just discussing the remaining 20%. But you are right: we should agree to disagree about the remaining 20%.

It has been a pleasure talking with you. Will look forward to discussing other issues with you on other threads.

 

[salman24]

This is DR. Zakir NAik's answer to the question:


Why is a man allowed to have more than one wife in Islam? i.e. why is polygamy allowed in Islam?

Answer:

Definition of Polygamy

1. Polygamy means a system of marriage whereby one person has more than one spouse. Polygamy can be of two types. One is polygyny where a man marries more than one woman, and the other is polyandry, where a woman marries more than one man. In Islam, limited polygyny is permitted; whereas polyandry is completely prohibited.

Now coming to the original question, why is a man allowed to have more than one wife?


2. The Qur’an is the only religious scripture in the world that says,"marry only one".

The Qur’an is the only religious book, on the face of this earth, that contains the phrase ‘marry only one’. There is no other religious book that instructs men to have only one wife. In none of the other religious scriptures, whether it be the Vedas, the Ramayan, the Mahabharat, the Geeta, the Talmud or the Bible does one find a restriction on the number of wives. According to these scriptures one can marry as many as one wishes. It was only later, that the Hindu priests and the Christian Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Many Hindu religious personalities, according to their scriptures, had multiple wives. King Dashrat, the father of Rama, had more than one wife. Krishna had several wives.

In earlier times, Christian men were permitted as many wives as they wished, since the Bible puts no restriction on the number of wives. It was only a few centuries ago that the Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Polygyny is permitted in Judaism. According to Talmudic law, Abraham had three wives, and Solomon had hundreds of wives. The practice of polygyny continued till Rabbi Gershom ben Yehudah (95% C.E to 1030 C.E) issued an edict against it. The Jewish Sephardic communities living in Muslim countries continued the practice till as late as 1950, until an Act of the Chief Rabbinate of Israel extended the ban on marrying more than one wife.


3. Hindus are more polygynous than Muslims

The report of the ‘Committee of The Status of Woman in Islam’, published in 1975 mentions on page numbers 66 and 67 that the percentage of polygamous marriages between the years 1951 and 1961 was 5.06% among the Hindus and only 4.31% among the Muslims. According to Indian law only Muslim men are permitted to have more than one wife. It is illegal for any non-Muslim in India to have more than one wife. Despite it being illegal, Hindus have more multiple wives as compared to Muslims. Earlier, there was no restriction even on Hindu men with respect to the number of wives allowed. It was only in 1954, when the Hindu Marriage Act was passed that it became illegal for a Hindu to have more than one wife. At present it is the Indian Law that restricts a Hindu man from having more than one wife and not the Hindu scriptures.

Let us now analyse why Islam allows a man to have more than one wife.


4. Qur’an permits limited polygyny

As I mentioned earlier, Qur’an is the only religious book on the face of the earth that says ‘marry only one’. The context of this phrase is the following verse from Surah Nisa of the Glorious Qur’an:

"Marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one."

[Al-Qur’an 4:3]

Before the Qur’an was revealed, there was no upper limit for polygyny and many men had scores of wives, some even hundreds. Islam put an upper limit of four wives. Islam gives a man permission to marry two, three or four women, only on the condition that he deals justly with them.

In the same chapter i.e. Surah Nisa verse 129 says:

"Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women...."

[Al-Qur’an 4:129]

Therefore polygyny is not a rule but an exception. Many people are under the misconception that it is compulsory for a Muslim man to have more than one wife.

Broadly, Islam has five categories of Do’s and Don’ts:

1.

‘Fard’ i.e. compulsory or obligatory
2.

‘Mustahab’ i.e. recommended or encouraged
3.

‘Mubah’ i.e. permissible or allowed
4.

‘Makruh’ i.e. not recommended or discouraged
5.

‘Haraam’ i.e. prohibited or forbidden

Polygyny falls in the middle category of things that are permissible. It cannot be said that a Muslim who has two, three or four wives is a better Muslim as compared to a Muslim who has only one wife.


5. Average life span of females is more than that of males

By nature males and females are born in approximately the same ratio. A female child has more immunity than a male child. A female child can fight the germs and diseases better than the male child. For this reason, during the pediatric age itself there are more deaths among males as compared to the females.

During wars, there are more men killed as compared to women. More men die due to accidents and diseases than women. The average life span of females is more than that of males, and at any given time one finds more widows in the world than widowers.


6. India has more male population than female due to female foeticide and infanticide

India is one of the few countries, along with the other neighbouring countries, in which the female population is less than the male population. The reason lies in the high rate of female infanticide in India, and the fact that more than one million female foetuses are aborted every year in this country, after they are identified as females. If this evil practice is stopped, then India too will have more females as compared to males.


7. World female population is more than male population

In the USA, women outnumber men by 7.8 million. New York alone has one million more females as compared to the number of males, and of the male population of New York one-third are gays i.e sodomites. The U.S.A as a whole has more than twenty-five million gays. This means that these people do not wish to marry women. Great Britain has four million more females as compared to males. Germany has five million more females as compared to males. Russia has nine million more females than males. God alone knows how many million more females there are in the whole world as compared to males.


8. Restricting each and every man to have only one wife is not practical

Even if every man got married to one woman, there would still be more than thirty million females in U.S.A who would not be able to get husbands (considering that America has twenty five million gays). There would be more than four million females in Great Britain, 5 million females in Germany and nine million females in Russia alone who would not be able to find a husband.

Suppose my sister happens to be one of the unmarried women living in USA, or suppose your sister happens to be one of the unmarried women in USA. The only two options remaining for her are that she either marries a man who already has a wife or becomes public property. There is no other option. All those who are modest will opt for the first.

In Western society, it is common for a man to have mistresses and/or multiple extra-marital affairs, in which case, the woman leads a disgraceful, unprotected life. The same society, however, cannot accept a man having more than one wife, in which women retain their honourable, dignified position in society and lead a protected life.

Thus the only two options before a woman who cannot find a husband is to marry a married man or to become public property. Islam prefers giving women the honourable position by permitting the first option and disallowing the second.

There are several other reasons, why Islam has permitted limited polygyny, but it is mainly to protect the modesty of women.

 

[Mamoon]

The Quran does not give a man permission to marry more than one wife. The Quran just doesn't forbid marrying more than one. There is a big difference.

1400 years ago in the desert. In time of war. It became necessary.

This ayat was delivered to the Prophet PBUH after the battle of Uhud. It only makes sense why it was after the battle. In that small village of Medina, which was not even a city but a small scattered settlement, most of the men died. Leaving behind women and children. Orphans. There was no concept of an orphanage.

This was a primitive society with no education. No real way for a woman to earn a living. Mostly the way to earn bread for your family was hard physical labor. That is why the prophet said marry the women so you can take responsibility for their children. It was a necessity, for that time.

Not applicable now in this society.

If God thought having more than one wife was the way to start a family, he would have created four Eves for Adam.

The illogical baseless reasons provided by the general Mullah population are beyond stupid. They are actually quite funny.

 

[Pakz]

This was a primitive society with no education. No real way for a woman to earn a living. Mostly the way to earn bread for your family was hard physical labor. That is why the prophet said marry the women so you can take responsibility for their children. It was a necessity, for that time.

Not applicable now in this society.

If God thought having more than one wife was the way to start a family, he would have created four Eves for Adam.

The illogical baseless reasons provided by the general Mullah population are beyond stupid. They are actually quite funny.

It's not applicable in the 'modern society', but why would the message be cultural if it's supposed to be guidance. I'm not saying your wrong and I agree, but it could also be argued that its just the easy way out of the scenario.

If the prophet was the perfect example then why shouldn't all the actions be applicable to the modern society? Easy way to fix the scenarios that arises?

I've mentioned this before, so I won't mention it again or I'll sound repeptive.

 

[Radiance Of Australis]

I hate it when people give the example of the Western world to justify polygamy when there is a perfectly good explanation for it already.
By the Western example I mean this example, 'A man in the West having extra-marital affair can't marry his mistress so he is basically cheating. Islam gives him a perfect option to marry two." People make it sound like we're supposed to support and feel sorry for the man for basically being too big of a chicken/douchebag to (i) either divorce his wife when he obviously prefers someone else, or (ii) love only one person at a time.

Polygamy in Islam wasn't allowed so that playboys could benefit from them so stop using this example to justify it.

 

[shaykh]

To put it in simple terms Islam does permit having 4 wives...and it doesn't really matter why he wants them PROVIDING his other wives give him permission to do so...

Polygamy can me sense when the ratios of men to women aren't matched...however amusingly a lot of polygamy takes place in the Arab world where there is a shortage of women...it makes no sense...i live in the Former Soviet Union where there is a shortage of men but polygamy is prohibited...

Personally I see no reason why any Western state should clamp down on it considering its an agreement between consenting adults....

As for Islam allowing it...it does...but it says treat them all equally which is essentially impossible and not measurable...and you're also allowed concubines too...

 

[KingKhanWC]

The Quran does not give a man permission to marry more than one wife. The Quran just doesn't forbid marrying more than one. There is a big difference.

1400 years ago in the desert. In time of war. It became necessary.

This ayat was delivered to the Prophet PBUH after the battle of Uhud. It only makes sense why it was after the battle. In that small village of Medina, which was not even a city but a small scattered settlement, most of the men died. Leaving behind women and children. Orphans. There was no concept of an orphanage.

This was a primitive society with no education. No real way for a woman to earn a living. Mostly the way to earn bread for your family was hard physical labor. That is why the prophet said marry the women so you can take responsibility for their children. It was a necessity, for that time.

Not applicable now in this society.

If God thought having more than one wife was the way to start a family, he would have created four Eves for Adam.

The illogical baseless reasons provided by the general Mullah population are beyond stupid. They are actually quite funny.

Some women are not able to give birth. If such a woman gives permission to her husband to marry(again) in order to have children, it's applicable for all time. Please think before delivering fatwas.

 

[Indiafan]

Some women are not able to give birth. If such a woman gives permission to her husband to marry(again) in order to have children, it's applicable for all time. Please think before delivering fatwas.

Some married men are impotent too. So is the other way around permitted?

 

[shaykh]

Some women are not able to give birth. If such a woman gives permission to her husband to marry(again) in order to have children, it's applicable for all time. Please think before delivering fatwas.

I second IndiaFan's question on your logic based argument...

Many men are unable to have children...whether it be through impotence or simply not having strong soldiers...surely then the woman should be allowed to marry again so she can give birth going by your logic...

On a serious note...if she can't give birth then how does that become a reason to get another wife...either don't have children or adopt...thats what most people do...

This argument doesn't hold up just like the male-female ration argument doesn't hold up...

 

[mithun_minhas]

Some married men are impotent too. So is the other way around permitted?

I guess wives would give divorce then and marry a real hunk

 

[Ummer Khan]

The Quran does not give a man permission to marry more than one wife. The Quran just doesn't forbid marrying more than one. There is a big difference.

1400 years ago in the desert. In time of war. It became necessary.

This ayat was delivered to the Prophet PBUH after the battle of Uhud. It only makes sense why it was after the battle. In that small village of Medina, which was not even a city but a small scattered settlement, most of the men died. Leaving behind women and children. Orphans. There was no concept of an orphanage.

This was a primitive society with no education. No real way for a woman to earn a living. Mostly the way to earn bread for your family was hard physical labor. That is why the prophet said marry the women so you can take responsibility for their children. It was a necessity, for that time.

Not applicable now in this society.

If God thought having more than one wife was the way to start a family, he would have created four Eves for Adam.

The illogical baseless reasons provided by the general Mullah population are beyond stupid. They are actually quite funny.

Think twice before you post anything about ISLAM.

Primitive society, I think the rural pockets of sub-continent are similar.

 

[Yossarian]

1400 years ago in the desert. In time of war. It became necessary.

This ayat was delivered to the Prophet PBUH after the battle of Uhud. It only makes sense why it was after the battle. In that small village of Medina, which was not even a city but a small scattered settlement, most of the men died. Leaving behind women and children. Orphans. There was no concept of an orphanage.

This was a primitive society with no education. No real way for a woman to earn a living. Mostly the way to earn bread for your family was hard physical labor. That is why the prophet said marry the women so you can take responsibility for their children. It was a necessity, for that time.

Not applicable now in this society.

Completely agree 100%.

As for one woman & multiple husbands, not permitted due to impossibility of determining who is the father of any child born. Same reason as why a widow or divorced woman cannot remarry until a sufficient time has elapsed ensuring that she was not already pregnant by her former husband.

Every rule, edict, advice in Islam had a real, practical, down-to-earth purpose and reason behind it. So as to ensure man (and woman) could live an honest, healthy, happy, peaceful existance in conjunction with one's fellow man.

 

[Mamoon]

It's not applicable in the 'modern society', but why would the message be cultural if it's supposed to be guidance. I'm not saying your wrong and I agree, but it could also be argued that its just the easy way out of the scenario.

If the prophet was the perfect example then why shouldn't all the actions be applicable to the modern society? Easy way to fix the scenarios that arises?

I've mentioned this before, so I won't mention it again or I'll sound repeptive.

There is a common misconception regarding Islamic teachings. Since the essence and message of Quran is not limited to time, meaning it is everlasting, we automatically presume that every single event or examples of that time is automatically applicable today. No not all.

You cannot enforce the ideology of a 1400 years old society today. What's left with us is the message of the Quran.

Doing good, helping others, helping neighbors, forgiveness, piety, abstaining from alcohol and other haram things, giving money too poor, honesty etc are things that having nothing to do with time period and society.

These things can be practiced in any society in any time period.

 

[Mamoon]

Think twice before you post anything about ISLAM.

Primitive society, I think the rural pockets of sub-continent are similar.

When did I post anything against Islam?

How is Arabia of 1400 years before not a primitive society?

 

[Mamoon]

Some women are not able to give birth. If such a woman gives permission to her husband to marry(again) in order to have children, it's applicable for all time. Please think before delivering fatwas.

Yes he can which is why Quran does not stop a man from marrying more than once.

If there are fertility issues, he can marry. It's a logical solution and nothing wrong with it.

 

[Mamoon]

Some married men are impotent too. So is the other way around permitted?

A woman can terminate her marriage, but she can't have two husbands simultaneously. The reason provided by most people is that determining the father of the baby would be impossible but that's just a cakewalk nowadays.

What I think is that in most societies, the man is the enforcer in the house. Now if a woman has multiple husbands, that can create an ego clash.

 

[Mamoon]

In any case, leaving your spouse or marrying again just because she's infertile is a pathetic thing to do. You can adopt a kid instead or take the blame if you love her so much.

 

[Yossarian]

There is a common misconception regarding Islamic teachings. Since the essence and message of Quran is not limited to time, meaning it is everlasting, we automatically presume that every single event or examples of that time is automatically applicable today. No not all.

You cannot enforce the ideology of a 1400 years old society today. What's left with us is the message of the Quran.

Doing good, helping others, helping neighbors, forgiveness, piety, abstaining from alcohol and other haram things, giving money too poor, honesty etc are things that having nothing to do with time period and society.

These things can be practiced in any society in any time period.

Completely agree (again).

Far too often, the basic universal principles and message of Islam (as highlighted in bold above) are confused with the manner in which they were implemented in a rural, largely uneducated society, split along tribal lines often hostile to each other, living in a desert environment 1400 years ago.

Whilst the universal message of Islam, as per Mamoon's post above, is consistent and applicable everywhere and throughout time, the actual methods employed to achieve that depend upon the circumstances of the society existing at the time, in that location.

 

[chaiwala]

As for one woman & multiple husbands, not permitted due to impossibility of determining who is the father of any child born. Same reason as why a widow or divorced woman cannot remarry until a sufficient time has elapsed ensuring that she was not already pregnant by her former husband.

In most modern societies, this reason is no longer applicable. You can easily determine it using a paternity test.

 

[Yossarian]

In most modern societies, this reason is no longer applicable. You can easily determine it using a paternity test.

Read the post properly. It was in reference to why the rule came about in the first place. I don't think they had DNA testing 1400 years ago, but then again I could be wrong - perhaps you have better info?

 

[Ims1]

Can we merge this thread with the Jihad thread?

is this poster still around ?