Forgiveness?

[pakistanbest]

Forgiveness is something that is always taught across the world but under what circumstances is forgiveness a big NO NO?

For me personally, I believe how can you forgive an individual who has hurt you but has no real regret or remorse towards you, Is it possible to forgive in that situation?

Some people would say be the bigger man, others would say you are well within your rights.

So PP'ers can you forgive if the individual does not show any real remorse towards you?

 

[iHammad]

Nope, why should we? Imo it is the responsibility of the individual to come and seek forgiveness, if he does not..then why should forgive him/her? Ainvayi?

 

[Ashraful_Rox]

It's really hard sometimes, I had a fight with one of my close friend and he used some very offensive language, cursed my family, my girlfriend, me etc. It was very hurtful, I was depressed and couldn't socialize properly, ruined my weekend and stayed home and ignored everyone. He left a mental scar because I loved him as a brother, I didn't say anything back to him, I listened and said just don't ever talk to me or call me. I can never forgive him.

 

[UP]

I can forgive easily no matter what happens.

 

[Cover Drive]

I would say that nowdays people consider forgiveness as an act of ego etc. What I have seen in real world is that some people won't forgive/say sorry because they believe if they apologize or forgive other person, there level of respect will decrease and they will not have same level of respect and I don't believe this.

Our Religion teaches us to be first in seeking forgiveness/apologizing and one who forgives/apologize will have a higher stature but some people in todays world think other way.

I am not trying to show off here but personally I try to be very very cautious when talking to someone be it real life or over PakPassion with what I say because I try to refrain from saying something which I believe will hurt others and I hate hurting someone else feelings as that would be last thing I would do in this world. So personally if I believe I have hurt others I immediately apologize for it.

So for me to ask for forgiveness is not a big deal because I don't want to leave this world by creating a stain on anyones heart.

What I really don't like is that there are some people (who are close to me) in this world who don't keep there hearts clean. For example, if I did or say anything to them and later apologized to them for my deeds and they say ''its okay etc etc' but the truth and fact is that there heart are not clean they still have something against me in their hearts which I believe is quite indecent.

But at last I guess each to its own.

 

[ali85]

If a person commits same mistake more than once knowingly...

 

[pakistanbest]

Forgiving easily is a sign that you have a heart but shows also that you can be a total walk over, that why you should never forgive untill you are asked by the individual to forgive them

 

[James]

When there has genuinely been an offending act committed - I say this to distinguish from a minor misunderstanding, or a case of an intelligent point going over a less intelligent individual's head - it is up to the offending individual to ask the offended individual for forgiveness, and up to the offended individual whether or not they grant it. The human race is far too complicated in its processes for one to expect an individual to forgive those around them on a daily basis, without any apparent gain of their own.

 

[Robert]

For me personally, I believe how can you forgive an individual who has hurt you but has no real regret or remorse towards you, Is it possible to forgive in that situation?

Well, for me it is about taking your power back. By forgiving the person, they cannot hurt you any more and if they show no remorse that's their problem not yours.

 

[KingKhanWC]

Well, for me it is about taking your power back. By forgiving the person, they cannot hurt you any more and if they show no remorse that's their problem not yours.

What if you have also done wrong to this person. You forgive them but they don't forgive you?

Also would you forgive anything?

 

[Indiafan]

Forgiveness is about healing yourself and nothing to do with the other person

If you do not forgive what can you do to the person? Your scenario is where the other person is not even remorseful and asking for forgiveness. Then what can you do?

Will you spend your time planning revenge? Trying to get him to feel remorse? Constantly thinking about him at all time? If you do not forgive, what will you do?

Forgiveness allows you to move on with your own life and stop brooding on the person and stop being a victim. Of course there is a huge difference between forgiveness and forgetfulness. forgive but never forget. So that you are never in the same situation again where someone can hurt you easily and you never trust the other person

 

[Indiafan]

What if you have also done wrong to this person. You forgive them but they don't forgive you?

Also would you forgive anything?

Well then move on with your life. Keeping it in your minds is just going to cause anger and bitterness. Avoid the person but move on

 

[Robert]

What if you have also done wrong to this person. You forgive them but they don't forgive you?

Also would you forgive anything?

I can only speak for me. If someone I have wronged chooses to forgive me, or not, it is their choice.

I would hope to be able to forgive anything, as Jo Cox's husband did to her unrepentant killer.

 

[Rayyman]

Forgiveness is about healing yourself and nothing to do with the other person

If you do not forgive what can you do to the person? Your scenario is where the other person is not even remorseful and asking for forgiveness. Then what can you do?

Will you spend your time planning revenge? Trying to get him to feel remorse? Constantly thinking about him at all time? If you do not forgive, what will you do?

Forgiveness allows you to move on with your own life and stop brooding on the person and stop being a victim. Of course there is a huge difference between forgiveness and forgetfulness. forgive but never forget. So that you are never in the same situation again where someone can hurt you easily and you never trust the other person

Exactly. Keeping a grudge just leads to unnecessary stress.

 

[HussainRx8]

Well, for me it is about taking your power back. By forgiving the person, they cannot hurt you any more and if they show no remorse that's their problem not yours.

Right on, Bob.

 

[KingKhanWC]

I can only speak for me. If someone I have wronged chooses to forgive me, or not, it is their choice.

I would hope to be able to forgive anything, as Jo Cox's husband did to her unrepentant killer.

You're a better man than me then Robert.

 

[aloo paratha]

I think if someone has wronged you, and they apologize, you should forgive. My way of thinking is sort of religious but if Allah can forgive our biggest sins, who are we to keep grudges against others.

Forgiveness only makes you a bigger person, it's much harder to forgive someone then to keep hating them. Same goes the other way around, it's harder to say sorry than it is to hide.

Now if someone never apologizes, it's hard. There is a certain somebody I can't help but want to hate, but I try to keep a neutral feeling for them. Never did they apologize, but hate won't get me anywhere, just waste my time.