Geordie Ahmed


PakPassion Administrator
Staff member
Jun 1, 2001
-Is it true you really support Sunderland? (AJ)

No its not - however if you can convince Henry to join the Toon I might just say it is

-All time favourite (INZIDABEST)

Team : might come as a surprise but its Pakistan
Player : Haven’t really had one, if I am forced to say one then I will say Imran Khan for what he did for Pakistan
Batsman : Ijaz Ahmed – just loved the man (in a completely straight way) the walk to the crease, the stance and his attitude to batting was fantastic.
Bowler : Wasim and Waqar – I can’t choose between them, love them both equally. It’s true when they say you appreciate something more when its gone

-How difficult is it combining employment with study? (OXY)

It was difficult because of the late nights but now i am just studying which is much better, work is a distraction that id rather do without.

-You are one of the few Pakpassioners that actually goes to watch football live. WHY?

The atmosphere at a match is so different to watching it on the tele, it’s a completely different experience especially when the crowd gets going. Totally amazing in my opinion, cant wait until we play better football because it will improve the atmosphere tenfold

-Your preference for NUFC's next manager? Should ‘Fat Freddie’ break the bank in quest of the new man?

Ottmar Hitzfeld is my choice but like I have mentioned before Fat Freddie seems allergic to foreigners which I think is due to Gullit, but on the flip side Dalglish and Souness haven’t sold the idea of a “British” manager. If I have to choose a British manager then I don’t would not mind Allardyce, to be frank anyone is better than Souness. You have to pay top dollar for the best and if we can get someone who can get us playing quality football again then the bank must be broken

-PP'er(s) whose views/posts you look forward to reading (and vice-versa)

z10, Oxy, WIY, Toonboy, Hafridi and Monsee

-You really hate Manchester United. Yet recently, we beat you in our last clash. How did that make you feel? (AMIR)

Me hate Manchester United? Whatever gave you that idea?

-If you were on death row how would you like to be put out of your misery? lethal injection, firing squad, electric chair? (BULLETPROOF MONK)

Forgive me but this isn’t something that I have given any though to before but since you ask and me being the nice guy that I am i will answer your question. This is a tough one because they are all equally appealing but if push comes to shove i would go for lethal injection, seems less messy

-If the username Geordie Ahmed was already in use what you have chosen as your username?

Hmmmmm good question, I cant see myself being anything other than Geordie Ahmed – if it was already in use then id probably go for something like Geordie Kashmiri, Geordie Pakistani, Geordie Mirpuri etc see the recurring theme? Yes Geordie would be involved somewhere because i am Geordie through and through

-Does it ever worry you one day you will have a nutter in the back of your cab like tom cruise in collateral?

My cab career is on a break at the moment (probably permanent depending on how things turn out) though if I was still working then I wouldn’t mind at all because just think of the potential money you can make from this (that’s providing the middle aged midget doesn’t kill me)

-Who’s the worst Newcastle manager gullit, dalglish or souness?

Dalglish though the other two run him close. The reason is that Dalglish took a team challenging for the Premiership to a team playing rubbish football in mid-table – the drop from him was far worse than what the other two did, despite being the worst out of the 3 he did buy Nobby and Given for us which is a positive thing so I don’t completely hate him

-What is the 'Story of Philosophy'? What does it mean to you? (Z10)

It means a lot because it currently ensures my bedside table doesn’t wobble

-You are a vocal advocate for illegal downloading. Why is this?

I am a Pakistani, a Mirpuri to be more precise do I need a better reason that that? If dvd’s were not so expensive I might just stop downloading . . . . . . . . . . NAH who am I kidding? Downloading is here to stay – WOHOOOOOOO

-What do you make of us Southerners? (keep it civil)

I can’t keep my opinion of southerners civil since they are scum of the earth. Seriousness aside I feel that people generally look down on us Southerners but if i am being honest (which I always am by the way) we do the same so what the hell, lets just carry on hating one another – WOHOOOOOOO

-List (in order) your 5 most favourite PPers

In order? That’s next to impossible but i will give it a try

1. Comma
2. z10
3. WIY
4. Oxy
5. Hafridi/Entralinks/Monsee

Though there are loads of ppl I have missed from the list like Hitman, Cartman, Miggy, Toonboy, Farhad, Merc etc etc

-Whose daughter would you take out for dinner- Bush's or Blairs? (you have to pick 1 of them)

The one that is thinner because it will be cheaper

-What is the hardest decision you have ever had to make?

Whether to answer this question or not

-Your favourite movie/ cd?

Shawshank Redemption and Tupac’s greatest hits

-Tupac or biggie?

Tupac hands down

-Who has had the greatest influence on your life? Who would you say has been the biggest role model for you?

Granddad who passed away 5 years ago

-Have you ever questioned your faith?

Nope. Maybe questioned aspects of it but found answers I was happy with

-Your thoughts on the war in Iraq?

How long do we have? It b-OIL-s my blood

-Fidel Castro - What do you make of the great one?

I don’t know too much about him but I laughed like made when he fell on stage a year or so back

-Hey GA when was the last time Newcastle won a MAJOR trophy? (WASIM786)

Newcastle Eagles won some basketball trophy last year (don’t ask me which one it was because I couldn’t possibly tell ya) Also Newcastle Falcons won a Rugby Cup a couple of years back
Oh and the Angel of the North won some prize even though it is a big lump of rust

-What's the history behind the name "Geordie"? - i.e: are you British or Pakistani? (HOMER)

People from Newcastle (North East of England and the immediate surrounding area are known as Geordies. I was born and bred in this country BUT my parents are from Mirpur, Pakistan – despite what Entralinks says I am a Pakistani and not white guy like he claims

-What other sports do you follow?

Football and Cricket are the main sports I follow. I do keep in touch with Boxing, Rugby, Tennis, F1 and a few other one’s but not as closely as I do with Football and cricket

-Pakistan is in the world cup final against India. Same day there is a soccer final and Newcastle is playing. Both the games are happening in your hometown. Which one would you go to? (NAFAJAFAM)

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh – That is a tough one, since the Football lasts for 105 minutes in total id go watch the football and then since its in the same city id go off to watch the cricket . . . HAH (you should have said different cities but too late now) Also the fact that we have beaten India quite a bit makes the decision easier

-What's between you and zushy, you guys cant seem to keep your fingers off each other?

I hope your sick mind isn’t insinuating anything dodgy – Nothing between us, I just love taking the mick out of people but I think Zushy though I was serious BUT he is Canadian so its not his fault really

-Have you gotten anything out of PP?

Yeah loads like ermmmm, aaaaah, hmmmmmmm, zzzzzzzzzzz, oh right you asked what I had gotten from PP, well that’s easy because I have gotten ummmmmmm, Ah what the hell who am I kidding, I have gotten nothing out of PP except RSI from typing all the bloody time and my mouse is on the verge of collapse now - I expect PP to fully compensate me for this, you will hear from my Lawyers (Claim Today) shortly

-Would you like to get marred in Pakistan or UK?

Insha’allah will mostly likely be getting married in Pakistan in the summer

-Any role by an actress that describes the woman of your dreams?

Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman – only joking.

-Who be your ideal manager for Newcastle..he/she doesn’t have to come from football or even a sporting field? (TOONBOY AWAISBOY)

I would love Mahmoud Ahmedinejad (Iranian President) to be the manager, you just have to love this guy. He is brilliant and he would sort the players out in next to no time.

-Should Alan Shearer retire end of this season?

Yes. The man is a legend and he has been brilliant for us but all good things come to an end. He is not the player he used to be and we need to move on without him, the best way to do that is by him retiring from playing. I felt last season he should have retired and I reckon he felt the same but it was all about going for the record

-What would be your answer of getting rid of Sehwag?

He is one of those players that is difficult to bowl to, much like Afridi, he just loves to bully attacks and he has punished us quite a bit. If it’s a flat pitch then you just have to hope he gives you a chance and you take it, on a more bowler friendly pitch he is much easier to get out

-What is the longest journey you have taken, whilst cabbying?

I went to Catterick Garrison which is in North Yorkshire, not too far but it’s a fair few bob

-Who would you like to see in the middle order after Inzamam retires?

MoYo and YK have to take over the massive gap that Inzimams retirement will bring. I would like to see Hasan Raza be given a go, he has scored heavily in domestic cricket and for the A team and if he is to be Inzi’s ‘replacement’ then he must be given a run. Whoever the management decide is the best person for the job I just hope he is given a run in the team because the pressure of taking over from Inzi is going to be absolutely HUGE

-What is your first outstanding memory of the Pakistani cricket team?

Winning the 92 World Cup, I remember laughing at Botham crying and school the following day was so good. I was one of 2 Pakistani’s in the whole year and there were only a few others in the whole school so you can imagine how that would have been like

-What’s better a Shoaib Akhtar yorker sending middle stump flying or a Shahid Afridi 6 hit over cow corner and out of the stadium? (RAZ)

This is a tough one. I would just go for Afridi hitting a 6 because many great bowlers have bowled Yorkers (see Waqar for many examples) BUT no one hits sixes like The Afridi

-Worst Pakistani match, Test and ODI of all time?

Test – making 50 odd in both innings to Australia
ODI – losing the 99 world cup final despite having what seemed like the perfect team

-Best Pakistani match, Test and ODI of all time?

Test – Beating India in Chennai in 99, they were on course to victory until Saqi got Tendulkar out
ODI – World Cup 92 hands, no need to explain why

-Greatest fast bowler of all time?

Waqar Younis. A fantastic bowler who ripped many a batting lineup apart in a few overs. His Strike Rate says it all

-Favourite Hollywood actress?

Jodie Foster

-What’s the best thing about PP?

The posters

-Was the 99 final fixed?


-Best ODI and Test innings?

ODI – Inzi’s 122 against India in Karachi 2004
TEST – Brian Lara’s 365

-Best ODI and Test bowling?

ODI – Waqars 7/36 against England in Headingley 2001 because I was there
TEST – Shoaib’s 6/30 against NZ in Wellington 2003

-Describe your perfect woman and where would you take her on your first date?

Aishwarya Rai and I would go to McDonalds

-If you were James Bond what special gadget would you have for your mission?

Invisibility. That would be so cool. This way Sami will finally take wickets because I’ll put the batsmen off

-Favourite city in Pakistan and why

Haven’t really travelled Pakistan so have to say Mirpur but ask me again in 6 months and i will let you know

-If you met Salman Rushdie today what would you say or do?

Where is your wife? (Google Padma Rushdie to see what I mean)

-If you met George Bush would you do or say?

Hey George you want a Pretzel?

-Do u only watch home games live sat in the stadium or do u go n watch away games a well? (CAVIN420)

Only home games at the moment, will down the line try to go to away games but we have such a string away following (one of if not the best away support in the country) it would be difficult getting tickets

-What and where are you studying? (KASHIF77)

I am studying Construction Management at Northumbria University

-Are there areas for improvement for the PakPassion website?

Yeah get rid of Entralinks

-When did you start following Pakistani cricket?

I properly started following Pakistan in late 98, just before the India tour. I used to follow it from the 92 world cup but I wasn’t that serious and the information was pretty limited

-What changes would u make if you were Newcastle manager? (HAFRIDI)

Id quit and let someone who knows what he is doing take over

-What’s your real name?

Geordie Ahmed . . . . serious.

-Why so much hate for Manchester United?

I have 4 brothers (2 older and 2 younger) who all support man-u, do you think I need a better reason than that?

-Did you enjoy it when Manchester united won the treble in 99?

No but I enjoyed it when they got knocked out of the Champions League in a group consisting of Lille, Benfica and Villareal

-Do you think Newcastle will ever be a better team than United?

Yes because if all goes well Malcolm Glazer is going to destroy man-utd *start of manic laughter* ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha *end of manic laughter*

-Where abouts do you think Newcastle will finish in the premiership this season?

Lower mid-table. This season is now just about surviving and getting the right man in. Next season is when we start to be up there providing the right man is in charge

-When was the last time u got into a fight and why?

Honestly cant remember, I have never been close to a fight and I would like it to stay that way

-Have you ever met any famous celebrities, if so who?...and who would you want to meet in the future?

The closest to famous were Johnny Wilkinson, Johnny Edwards and I met the chuckle brothers. I would love to meet Muhammad Ali, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and Zinedine Zidane

-Angelina Jolie or Aishwarya Rai and why?

Depends what mood i am in, though most of the times it will be Jolie

-Nasser or Ansar? (you know what i am on about)

Ha ha, what a question? Nasser because he likes football (even though he supports spurs)

-Do you prefer horror or comedy?

Comedy – I am a chilled out person so a joke is far better for me

-Who is your favourite cricketer? (SAQIB)

Younis Khan (Rana is a close second) – what a brilliant player and its magnificent the way he has played despite being under enormous pressure. Also love the 100% he gives to the team and I love his commitment to the team, he puts the team before his personal records and that is a rare commodity nowadays

-Football or Cricket? What do like more Newcastle United or Pakistan?

Football and Newcastle United

-Fave Geordie? (ELAN TEDRONAI)

Not like there is a huge list but Alan Shearer for giving us 200 goals. Oh and Jimmy Nail for singing crocodile shoes

-What’s so good with Newcastle? Any thing special in that city?

I am not going to try to sell it to you because to be frank it doesn’t have anything that other cities do not but for me it is home and I love the place.
-Do you agree that southerners are ****?


-How did you find this goddamn website that is so addictive in the first place?

I was part of the mass migration that took place from the BBC boards in March 2004 and I just love the place

-What would you name your first child (either sex)? (PAKOLA)

Alan Shearer Ahmed

-Are you for or against capital punishment?

I used to be 100% for it but i am not so sure now. I guess it depends on the individual case, like for example I didn’t agree with Tookie Williams being executed because I felt he was more useful alive than dead. In cases where people are better off dead (like Rapists etc) I agree with a suggestion MIG made that perhaps we should use these people to test out drugs

-Abortion - good or bad?

Bad unless there are extenuating circumstances (rape, danger to the mother etc)

-Does Santa Claus exist?

Yes, I have seen his photo

-If you end up in heaven, what is the first thing you would do?

Look for the apple tree

-Would you rather see Newcastle winning a cup final (unlikely) or Pakistan winning the world cup? (likely) (IQBALHAROON213)

Pakistan have won the World Cup before so Newcastle United unless its against India

-Its mid May, lovely day, your sat at home, FA Cup final between Newcastle and Man Utd about to come on BBC 1, a chance for Alan Shearer to get some revenge for all those Manc chants, and finally dispel all those doubt about not going to UTD, its his last game before he retires, just about to kick off when your friend phones you, it’s the Cricket World Cup final, Pakistan vs India, first innings has gone and a competitive total has been put up by the team batting first, the cricket is only on SKY, and you don’t have it, your friend says come round and watch the cricket, and if you leave now (just before kick off), you will be able to watch the whole of the second innings but miss the whole of the FA Cup Final.. (HAS)

I would get myself a portable TV where I can watch the FA cup and the Cricket at the same time

-If you had to chop one of your ears off, which one would you, left or right?

What lovely questions. I genuinely am not bothered so I’ll let you decide

-Favourite footballer?

All Time – Maradona
Currently – Zidane and RonnyD

-Do you think footballers should play more games?

I am not bothered I just don’t want them to complain if they do play more

-Do you think footballers get paid too much?

Yes and No. It is a lot of money BUT compared to other entertainment industries it is reasonable. The issue I have is when players play rubbish all the time they still get paid, I would much prefer a performance based pay which is extremely unlikely

-Please describe your feelings towards George W Bush and those of his ilk (GASHERBRUM)

Pity because Insha’allah they have blood on their hands which will have to be accounted for on the day of judgement

-Name one person, the mention of whose name makes you mad ?[note MIG is not a name that comes to your mind] (MIG)

Kenny Dalglish but that is only because you have ruled our MIG

-Why do you watch Indian movies and which hero do you admire the most?

Just a bit of entertainment. Do not admire any of them, I mean I watch the films but I don’t take it seriously

-Do you think Imran Khan's kids will ever play cricket for Pak? Would you want them to?

If they are good enough I would want them to play for Pak but if not then England can have them

-How strong is your Geordie accent? -What is your favourite Geordie word? (ROB H)

It varies depending on who I talk to. It can be really strong if i am talking to another Geordie but it eases up when I talk to “other” people
Favourite word would be Deeky (look) and Hyem (home)

-How are your cricketing skills?

Non-existent but i am still better than Agarkar (not that it takes much)

-What would you do in your spare time if there was no PP? (TEAM SLAYER)

I couldn’t possibly tell ya unless I get banned for a few weeks

-List your favourite 3 all time Pak cricketers? (FESSAL)

1. Imran Khan
2. Wasim Akram
3. Waqar Younis

-How do you rate these places: Derby, Bradford and Newcastle?

1. Newcastle – its home love it
2. Bradford – too many Asians and they don’t get along
3. Derby – kinda similar to Bradford

-Your view on Normanton, Derby?

Haven’t really visited it that much and when I have it has only been for a short time. However from the time I have spent there it seems like a ghetto to me which is something I personally hate

-If you had a choice of having dinner with 2 cricketers from Pakistan who would they be?
and same for 2 Newcastle united players? If the dinners clashed which one would you choose and why?

Younis Khan and Rana. Shearer and Given
If they clashed then it’s a no brainer since I would rather eat with fellow Muslims

-GA, the North East of England has not got the best of reputations in the UK - your views on living in Newcastle? (SAJ)

Do you mean from an Asians perspective? Because if that’s the case I know people loot at Newcastle negatively because they just assume a place which doesn’t have many Asians cannot be good BUT I totally disagree. I like the fact there are not too many Asians like the amount there are in Bradford, Birmingham etc
I have suffered more direct racism in Bradford than I have in Newcastle because in Bradford (and other Asian areas) there is a direct split between the Asians and whites which creates massive amounts of tension but there is no such thing in Newcastle though I believe this will change 20 or so years down the line

-Moin or Rashid Latif and why ?

Rashid Latif because he was the better gloveman. I feel you should select your wicketkeepers on their ability to keep wicket not how their batting is, Yes it is a bonus if they can bat well. However its no good picking a Keeper who bats well but is an average gloveman because not taking chances will be more costly overall. We are so lucky to have Kamran Akmal who is doing a splendid job in both disciplines

-Are mods doing their job as good as possible? (ENTRALINKS)

Yes because if they wasn’t then the site would not be doing as well as it has been. Although I do question you being part of the mod team because you are a lazy good for nothing . . . . .

-Is this board designed by Nauman user-friendly in your opinion, easy to navigate through and good on the eye?

It looks good and feels good. I like the delayed dropped down menu at the top, very good that is, unless you (Entra) came up with it

-Imagine you're in a car driving off, you come to a place where on one side there is a most gorgeous woman standing waving at you and on the other side its me, dancing in rain, throwing my arms and legs in 360 degrees, suffering from psychosis, in desperate need of hospitalisation, and just wearing the underwear with brown stains on it. Now you have place for only one more person in your car, who would you pick up?

Entralinks when is the last time you went for a check up? Actually have you ever been for a check up?

And if you get me in, I throw you out, get the woman in and drive off, what would your reaction be after knowing it was a set up?

I would think I need to wake up before this nightmare gets any worse

-As a Taxi Driver do you ever fancy doing a Travis Bickle (geddit?)
If so anyone particular on PP? (AMOEBA)

I know Travis Bickle is Robert De Nero’s character in Taxi Driver but I haven’t seen the film so i am afraid I cant comment

-Why are Geordies allergic to coats?

I think it is because we are tight, a vest is far cheaper than a coat and no vest is even cheaper so that leaves you more money for pies which result in getting more layers of fat thus nullifying the need for a coat

-You've been on PP for a long time. Do you think it's changed and if so how?

The design of the site has changed and the way we use it has but in essence it is the same site I joined 2 years ago, I love cricket but I cant see myself discussing it anywhere other than PP. The posters are brilliant and the mods are doing a good job (Entra aside)

-What problems do you think the Pakistani Community, and the Mirpuri community in particular, is facing in the UK at moment. What are the remedies?

We still think we are in Pakistan/Mirpur, we still have the same ideologies that we had back home and we need to get out of that. I mean we are here to stay for the foreseeable future and whilst I don’t agree that we should adopt the British culture, far from it, I just feel we need to drop some of the unsavoury aspects of our culture. For example I know in Mirpur (I suspect it is the same in other parts of Pakistan aswell) what others thought mattered more than your own opinion, I could understand back home how it would affect your life BUT in England that is not the case and we should do what is right and not what the community thinks is “right” because they are mostly wrong in my opinion, the numerous cases of “honour” killings highlight this since they take place because one cannot show their face