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Cousin Marriages [Discussion Thread]

A relationship will turn out better if you marry within your own gene-pool? Now who told you that? Any evidence to back up that fact?

Infact i can think of lots of family complications if the in-laws are related - family interference for one, a gossip heaven for another. Having In-laws is bad enough, having one in the family - No, thanks!!! 🤣

I gave you the article.

Read it properly. Don't be in such a hurry to reply.
 
I gave you the article.

Read it properly. Don't be in such a hurry to reply.

Thats one of the most inane research studies i have read in my life - all it says is you have more kids if you marry your cousin, as if a big population is a solution to any problem in this world. If you read carefully, it also points out that marrying your cousin increases the risk of passing on a genetic recessive disease by 25% - which is the whole point of this discussion.
 
What's up with Indians calling their cousins their sisters??

THEY'RE NOT YOUR SISTERS. Your sister is the person who's your dad's daughter hence your sister.
Your first cousin ISN'T your sibling how hard is that to understand?


Also, I've seen hindus marrying Cows. Aren't cows supposed to be their mother??
So why are they marrying their mother??
 
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Lol no she isn't.

What's up with Indians calling their cousins their sisters??

THEY'RE NOT YOUR SISTERS. Your sister is the person who's your dad's daughter hence your sister.
Your first cousin ISN'T your sibling how hard is that to understand?


Also, I've seen hindus marrying Cows. Aren't cows supposed to be their mother??
So why are they marrying their mother??

Even if they are not blood brothers, they still share a lot of blood.
 
You share blood with pretty much everyone on this Earth.

So you're not going to marry anyone.

Ok boss. If you want to marry your cousin do it but just know that the consequences are faced by the children and it is scientifically and medically proven.
 
Ok boss. If you want to marry your cousin do it but just know that the consequences are faced by the children and it is scientifically and medically proven.

No i don’t want to marry cousin. If you had actually comprehended what i was saying then you would have known.

The reason i replied is because You’re cousins siblings which is just wrong. How did me marrying or not marrying my cousin come into this?

Stop lying
 
The obsession with cousin marriage is weird. It is known that it poses risk to the children, it's very selfish.

If we get past the 'eww' factor, then I suppose it's fine to marry your cousin, as long as all precautions are taken that pregnancy is impossible, from a purely philosophical standpoint. But that isn't the case in most Pakistani/Muslims contexts, as children are a huge part of that.
 
This idea is archaic and must stop. Ulema need to step in and say it too.
 
I do not personally want to do cousin marriage but here's an interesting article I found:

No Genetic Reason to Discourage Cousin Marriage, Study Finds

Contrary to widely held beliefs and longstanding taboos in America, first cousins can safely have children together, without a great risk of birth defects or genetic disease, scientists are reporting today. They say there is no biological reason to discourage cousins from marrying.

First cousins are somewhat more likely than unrelated parents to have a child with a serious birth defect, but scientists say the risk is not large. In the general population, the risk that a child will be born with a major birth defect, like spina fida, is 3 to 4 percent; to that background risk, first cousins must add another 1.7 to 2.8 percentage points, the researchers said.

Although the increase represents almost a doubling of the risk, since the background risk is small to begin with, the result is still not considered large enough to discourage people from having children, geneticists say. And they point out that no one questions the right of other people with far higher levels of risk to have children. For example, people with Huntington's disease, a severe neurological disorder, have a 50 percent chance of passing the disease to their children.

The researchers, convened by the National Society of Genetic Counselors, based their conclusions on a review of six major studies conducted from 1965 to August 2000, involving many thousands of births.

For first cousins, "there is a slightly increased risk, but in terms of general risks in life it's not very high," said Dr. Arno Motulsky, a professor emeritus of medicine and genome sciences at the University of Washington, and the senior author of the report, being published today in The Journal of Genetic Counseling.

Dr. Motulsky said that medical geneticists had known for a long time that there was little or no harm in cousins' marrying and having children.

"Somehow, this hasn't become general knowledge," Dr. Motulsky said. "Among the public and physicians there's a feeling it's real bad and brings a lot of disease, and there's a lot of social and legal disapproval."

Thirty states have laws forbidding first cousins to marry, but no countries in Europe have such prohibitions, and in parts of the Middle East, Africa and Asia, marriages between cousins are considered preferable. "In some parts of the world," the report says, "20 to 60 percent of all marriages are between close biological relatives."

Dr. Motulsky said the American laws against cousin marriage should be abolished, because they are based in part on the mistaken belief that the children of such parents will suffer from terrible physical and mental illnesses.

"They are ancient laws in terms of thinking it's really bad," he said. "The data show it isn't that bad. There shouldn't be a law that you can't marry your cousin."

The article says, "Romantic relationships between cousins are not infrequent in the United States and Canada." But many cousins who marry or live together keep their family ties a secret because of the stigma, so the frequency of such unions is not known. Estimates of marriages between related people, which include first cousins and more distant ones, range from less than 0.1 percent of the general population to 1.5 percent. In the past, small studies have found much higher rates in some areas: a survey in 1942 found 18.7 percent in a small town in Kentucky, and a 1980 study found 33 percent in a Mennonite community in Kansas.

The report made a point of saying that the term "incest" should not be applied to cousins, but only to sexual relations between siblings or between parents and children. Babies who result from those unions are thought to be at significantly higher risk of genetic problems, the report said, but there is not enough data to be sure.

The new report says genetic counselors should advise cousins who want to have children together in much the same way they advise everybody else, and that no extra genetic tests are required before conception. The guidelines urge counselors to take a thorough family history and, as they do for all patients, look for any inherited diseases that might run in the family or in the patients' ethnic group, and order tests accordingly. During pregnancy, the woman should have the standard blood tests used to screen for certain neurological problems and other disorders, and an ultrasound exam.

As a newborn, the baby should be tested for deafness and certain metabolic diseases — tests already given to all newborns in some parts of the country — which are among the conditions that may be slightly more likely to occur in children whose parents are cousins. Some of the metabolic problems are treatable, and children with hearing losses do better if they get help early in life.

Dr. Motulsky said the panel of experts began working on the cousin question about two years ago after a survey of counselors found a lot of variability — and misinformation — in the advice given to people who wanted to know whether cousins could safely have children together.

The president-elect of the counselors' group, Robin L. Bennett, who is a co-author of the report and a genetic counselor at the University of Washington, said: "Just this week I saw a 23-year-old woman whose parents were cousins, and she was told to have a tubal ligation, which she did at the age 21, because of the risk to her children. And there's no risk to her children. People are getting this information from small-town doctors who may not know the risk, don't have access to this information and just assume it's a big risk."

The young woman hoped to have the operation reversed, Ms. Bennett said.

The geneticists' article includes a personal account from a woman who said she had lived with her cousin for six years, "and we are madly in love." When she became pregnant, her gynecologist warned that the child would be sickly, and urged her to have an abortion. A relative predicted that the baby would be ********. Describing herself as heartbroken, the woman had the abortion, which she called "the worst mistake of my life."

When she learned later that the increased risk of birth defects was actually quite small, "I cried and cried," she said.

The small increase in risk is thought to occur because related people may be carrying some of the same disease-causing genes, inherited from common ancestors. The problems arise from recessive genes, which have no effect on people who carry single copies, but can cause disease in a person who inherits two copies of the gene, one from each parent. When two carriers of a recessive gene have a child, the child has a 1 in 4 chance of inheriting two copies of that gene. When that happens, disease can result. Cystic fibrosis and Tay-Sachs disease, for example, are caused by recessive genes.

First cousins share 12.5 percent of their genes, and 6.25 percent of their children's genes will consist of pairs in which identical copies have been inherited from the two parents. Some of those identical pairs may be recessive genes that cause illness. Unrelated people share fewer genes, and so their risk of illness caused by recessive genes is a bit lower.

Keith T., a 30 year-old-man, married his cousin seven year ago. In 1998, frustrated by the lack of information for cousins who wanted to marry, he started a Web site, cousincouples.com. Thousands of people have visited the site, he said. It is full of postings from people who have married their cousins or want to, and it highlights famous people who married their first cousins, including Charles Darwin, who, with Emma Wedgwood, had 10 children, all healthy, some brilliant.

Mr. T. asked that his name not be used, because he does business in a small town and fears that he will lose customers if they find out that his wife is also his cousin.

"If someone told me when I was young that I'd marry my cousin I would have said they were crazy," he said. "I thought the idea of marrying your cousin was kind of icky."

But then, as a teenager, he got to know a cousin whom he had hardly seen in childhood, and they fell in love.

Their families, he said, were in "total shock." Relatives said, " `They'll throw you in jail, you'll have defective children,' " Mr. T. recalled. "Those were some of the nicer things they said." When he and his cousin married, they invited only three people to the wedding. They hope to make up for that someday by having a "huge wedding," he said.

Mr. T. said he had read everything he could find about cousin marriages, including an entire book on the subject, "Forbidden Relatives," by Martin Ottenheimer, a professor of anthropology at Kansas State University. The subtitle of the book is "The American Myth of Cousin Marriage," and Dr. Ottenheimer heaps criticism on the state marriage laws.

Mr. T. said he was delighted to learn years ago that cousins' risks of birth defects were only slightly higher than those of unrelated people. So the study being published today did not surprise him. But he said he hoped it would convince the rest of the world.

"You can find people in the general population who have a greater risk than first cousins," he said. "It's one of my pet peeves. State laws single out cousins. They shouldn't." He and his wife hope to have children, he said.

Source: https://www.nytimes.com/2002/04/03/...o-discourage-cousin-marriage-study-finds.html.
 
Parents should not get obsessed over it and should not desire a cousin as first choice partner for offspring.
if it happens organically then nothing wrong in it imo.
 
I believe cousin marriages are now far less in the UK. From personal experience anyway. My family has completely moved away from this concept.
 
Quite a few children in my extended family have/had disabilites, including my own 3 kids (one severe- aged 10, two- aged 4 and 2 with learning difficulties).

Nearly all of us in our family have had cousin marriages, including myself...im totally against it and would not encourage it...unfortunately there was no way out of it for me as there emotional blackmail from parents was involved. Me and the Mrs have suffered alot of stress.

Not only do cousin marriages cause genetic defects, but also infighting between families...I have experienced all this first hand.

12yrs on from this post..my severley disabled son is 20, my two daughters with needs are 17 & 13.

I have given up on blaming outside factors and I am just grateful for what I have. I am a full time carer for my son which itself is a job..currently taking a break from employment. The other half takes care of the girls.

That being said..it does break my heart to see my children like this. I don’t know what they are going through because they are not able to tell us. As a family, there is not much that we can do by way of activities..even in this hot weather. But we live on and are grateful.
 
12yrs on from this post..my severley disabled son is 20, my two daughters with needs are 17 & 13.

I have given up on blaming outside factors and I am just grateful for what I have. I am a full time carer for my son which itself is a job..currently taking a break from employment. The other half takes care of the girls.

That being said..it does break my heart to see my children like this. I don’t know what they are going through because they are not able to tell us. As a family, there is not much that we can do by way of activities..even in this hot weather. But we live on and are grateful.
May Allah give you more strength and patience brother.
 
12yrs on from this post..my severley disabled son is 20, my two daughters with needs are 17 & 13.

I have given up on blaming outside factors and I am just grateful for what I have. I am a full time carer for my son which itself is a job..currently taking a break from employment. The other half takes care of the girls.

That being said..it does break my heart to see my children like this. I don’t know what they are going through because they are not able to tell us. As a family, there is not much that we can do by way of activities..even in this hot weather. But we live on and are grateful.

You are a great dad man. Its very unfortunate about what you are going through. No one can imagine the hurt.
 
12yrs on from this post..my severley disabled son is 20, my two daughters with needs are 17 & 13.

I have given up on blaming outside factors and I am just grateful for what I have. I am a full time carer for my son which itself is a job..currently taking a break from employment. The other half takes care of the girls.

That being said..it does break my heart to see my children like this. I don’t know what they are going through because they are not able to tell us. As a family, there is not much that we can do by way of activities..even in this hot weather. But we live on and are grateful.

God bless you and hopefully gives you great strength! Your children are lucky to you have as their father!
 
This thread feels so weird as to read as an Indian

I guess this a major cultural difference between Pakistan and India. In India if you are Hindu / Sikh - even marrying a 9th or 10th cousin is strictly forbidden. Forget cousin marriage. We have the concept of gotra. If 2 persons belongs to same " gotra " it means they have blood relations extending back to thousands of years. Example if 2000 years back two brothers existed - their descendants will belong to same gotra - even if none of their future progeny inter marry. Marrying within the same gotra is strictly forbidden even if you have no blood relations in the past 20 generations. In fact in North India there are honor killings if a couple belonging to same gotra marries
 
This thread feels so weird as to read as an Indian

I guess this a major cultural difference between Pakistan and India. In India if you are Hindu / Sikh - even marrying a 9th or 10th cousin is strictly forbidden. Forget cousin marriage. We have the concept of gotra. If 2 persons belongs to same " gotra " it means they have blood relations extending back to thousands of years. Example if 2000 years back two brothers existed - their descendants will belong to same gotra - even if none of their future progeny inter marry. Marrying within the same gotra is strictly forbidden even if you have no blood relations in the past 20 generations. In fact in North India there are honor killings if a couple belonging to same gotra marries

Are you sure about this - an undergrad school buddy of mine (South indian from Hyderabad, i think) got married to his paternal aunt’s daughter - which according to him is allowed. So maybe this is ok in some Indian communities?
 
Are you sure about this - an undergrad school buddy of mine (South indian from Hyderabad, i think) got married to his paternal aunt’s daughter - which according to him is allowed. So maybe this is ok in some Indian communities?

Highly doubt Hyderabadi Hindus will do it but it was common among Tamil Hindus till 1990s .
 
Are you sure about this - an undergrad school buddy of mine (South indian from Hyderabad, i think) got married to his paternal aunt’s daughter - which according to him is allowed. So maybe this is ok in some Indian communities?

Some south Indian communities especially in Tamil Nadu do have cousin marriage custom

But in North , East and West India its strictly forbidden
 
Are you sure about this - an undergrad school buddy of mine (South indian from Hyderabad, i think) got married to his paternal aunt’s daughter - which according to him is allowed. So maybe this is ok in some Indian communities?
Yes, Sister in law.

Cousins (Maternal) strictly prohibited but sister in laws (Paternal) are allowed in some South Indian communities.
Because paternal are not blood related compared to maternal..as per them.
 
A Pakistani friend once told me that in Pakistan there is very little social interaction between sexes in school / college. So only interaction between males & females is with their cousins within the family. Which is why most guys are more comfortable choosing wife from their cousins with whom they knew well for long time. This probably explains why cousin marriages are so common in Pakistan
 
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I have some extended family members who Married theirs cousins . A few of their children have learning disabilities and 2 are totally handicapped I am talking about 5 cousin couples. Total 14 kids and 2-3 have minor issues and two are totally handicapped
 
I tried talking some of my punjabi Pakistani friends who were raised in the US out of it but their argument was if the prophets family did it so why can't we 😄

I know parents prefer keeping in the family so they feel safe but c'mon now it's 2023 this type of thinking needs to die down.
 
I think someone here posted years ago. Pakistanis make 1.2 %or something like that if the uk population and account for 25 percent of children born with learning or physical disabilities.
 
Married to my cousin and Alhamdulilah my kids are perfectly fine and are very intelligent. My parents are not cousins and neither are my wife's parents cousins.

Cousin marriage when done for generations upon generations is where there can be genetic disorders.
 
Married to my cousin and Alhamdulilah my kids are perfectly fine and are very intelligent. My parents are not cousins and neither are my wife's parents cousins.

Cousin marriage when done for generations upon generations is where there can be genetic disorders.
There is a reason they are forbidden by law and a taboo culturally in many countries. I am glad your kids are fine. But this practice over time makes the whole population a bit dumber . Diversify diversify.
 
Somaiya Begum's dad ‘was incandescent with rage after she refused to marry a cousin’

RIP to the victim. When will these forced cousin marriages involving certain British Pakistani communities come to an end?

https://www.thetelegraphandargus.co...s-dad-incandescent-rage-refused-marry-cousin/

Somaiya Begum’s father was “incandescent with rage” after she refused to marry a cousin she had never met in Pakistan when she was 16, a court has been told.

Miss Begum’s aunt, Ishrath Khan, told the trial of her brother Mohammed Taroos Khan that her niece’s refusal to take part in the wedding left Mohammed Yaseen Khan – the defendant’s brother and victim’s father – furious.

Ms Khan agreed with Zafar Ali KC, defending, when he suggested to Bradford Crown Court: “Yaseen was humiliated when it became clear that the wedding wouldn’t take place?”

And she also agreed with the barrister when he said: “He was furious, wasn’t he? He was incandescent with rage?”

And she agreed that Yaseen Khan’s wife was also furious, especially as it was her nephew who was the intended groom.

The witness described how her niece went to the police and a Forced Marriage Protection Order was issued which led to all of Yaseen Khan’s children being removed from his house.

Ms Khan said Miss Begum went to live with another of her brothers, Dawood Khan, and her grandmother, where she was happy, especially as he was a “liberal chap”.

But she said she warned Dawood “10 times or more” to protect Miss Begum from her father, agreeing that this was due to her fears Yaseen Khan wanted “revenge on his daughter for the so-called loss of honour that he suffered”.

Ms Khan agreed with Mr Ali that Miss Begum’s father, who she said had now moved to Pakistan, was “not exactly champion of women’s rights”.

She said he had always been violent towards her and a sisters as they were growing up, but never the boys in the family.

Ms Khan agreed that Miss Begum was a “very bright student”, but her father had stopped her going to school and tried to stop her going to university.

She told the jury Yaseen Khan was “cruel” and would not let Miss Begum watch TV or let her wear or eat what she wanted.

Mr Ali said: “Somaiya was petrified of her father, wasn’t she?”

The witness agreed.

Asked about the defendant, her brother Taroos Khan, Ms Khan agreed that he had helped rescue her from an attempt to force her to marry some years ago.

She agreed that he “stuck up for Somaiya”.

Mr Ali asked her: “He was on her side as he was on your side?”

And she agreed.

Mr Ali said Somaiya's dad lost face in Pakistan and business because of the marriage refusal. It had also been humiliating for him in the Bradford Patham community and the wider Asian community in the city.

Also giving evidence on Wednesday, Dawood Khan told the court the family had been split for years into two feuding camps.

He said the defendant was in the middle.

Dawood Khan told the jury his niece, Ms Begum, enjoyed living with him and her grandmother after she was removed from her parents’ home.

He told the jury: “I don’t even say she was happy, she was very happy.”

He said: “She was a blessing to have in my household.”

And he added: “She was the light of my life”.

Asked if he was the defendant’s brother, he replied: “Unfortunately so, yes.”
 
The kind of cruel, injustice, savagery women in Pakistan face is unmatched! They are treated worse than animals and regarded as sub-humans whose only job is to obey a man and reproduce.

Forced marriages will never stop in Pakistan because the biggest sin in Pakistan is marrying for love. A culture where love is seen as vulgar is a culture of beasts!

On the same topic, Pakistani family murdered their daughter in Italy, chopped up her body and buried her in a forest after she refused to marry a cousin.

The same happened with two sisters from Spain who refused to sponsor their husbands from Pakistan because they did not love them. The two sisters were killed violently.

Killing of women in Pakistan will never end!
 
There is a reason they are forbidden by law and a taboo culturally in many countries. I am glad your kids are fine. But this practice over time makes the whole population a bit dumber . Diversify diversify.

It's actually very unique for British Pakistanis. With more education and exposure, you would expect this trend to decline, but reverse has happened. Cousin marriage trend has increased in next generation among British Pakistanis.

----------------------

In short, consanguineous marriage can be expected to decline as people have fewer children, as households become less directly dependent on land and as women achieve higher levels of education.

Given this expectation, British Pakistani cousin marriage presents a puzzle. Evidence from small-scale studies conducted in the 1980s and the 1990s showed cousin marriage to be more common among young British Pakistani adults than among their parents.

A West Yorkshire study found an increase from 33 to 55% in the proportion of first-cousin marriages

An Oxford study found an increase from 37 to 59% in first-cousin marriages

By contrast, a recent study from Norway demonstrates that, after an initial slight increase, the rate of first-cousin marriage among Pakistanis declined dramatically from 48.3 to 18.8% over a decade

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5079102/

-----------------------------------------

It's an older data, I hope trend is reversing now.

But I found it puzzling and can't think of a reason that British Pakistanis started marrying their cousins even more in next generation. Average IQ going down, learning disorder, health issues, on and on... Why take that option?
 
It's actually very unique for British Pakistanis. With more education and exposure, you would expect this trend to decline, but reverse has happened. Cousin marriage trend has increased in next generation among British Pakistanis.

----------------------

In short, consanguineous marriage can be expected to decline as people have fewer children, as households become less directly dependent on land and as women achieve higher levels of education.

Given this expectation, British Pakistani cousin marriage presents a puzzle. Evidence from small-scale studies conducted in the 1980s and the 1990s showed cousin marriage to be more common among young British Pakistani adults than among their parents.

A West Yorkshire study found an increase from 33 to 55% in the proportion of first-cousin marriages

An Oxford study found an increase from 37 to 59% in first-cousin marriages

By contrast, a recent study from Norway demonstrates that, after an initial slight increase, the rate of first-cousin marriage among Pakistanis declined dramatically from 48.3 to 18.8% over a decade

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5079102/

-----------------------------------------

It's an older data, I hope trend is reversing now.

But I found it puzzling and can't think of a reason that British Pakistanis started marrying their cousins even more in next generation. Average IQ going down, learning disorder, health issues, on and on... Why take that option?

People saw it as a good way to bring their relatives over to the UK and to keep wealth "in the family".
 
People saw it as a good way to bring their relatives over to the UK and to keep wealth "in the family".

Shouldn't this apply to Pakistani immigrants to other nations as well? What's unique about Pakistani migrating to Britain?

Like Norway cited above? Even in US, there is no issue to bring your spouse if you marry a non-Citizen. Expected trend over any long period should be down and not up. That's what I would expect.

Keeping wealth was more prevalent in agricultural society all around the world in old era. That's not the case now. Immigration is surely a huge factor, but it does not explain British Pakistani being an outlier when compared to Pakistani immigrant in other countries.
 
Shouldn't this apply to Pakistani immigrants to other nations as well? What's unique about Pakistani migrating to Britain?

Like Norway cited above? Even in US, there is no issue to bring your spouse if you marry a non-Citizen. Expected trend over any long period should be down and not up. That's what I would expect.

Keeping wealth was more prevalent in agricultural society all around the world in old era. That's not the case now. Immigration is surely a huge factor, but it does not explain British Pakistani being an outlier when compared to Pakistani immigrant in other countries.

Can't comment about other countries I am just giving you the reasons why British Pakistanis ( mainly mirpuris) go for cousin marriages.

I think around 70% of British Pakistanis are Mirpuri whereas the overseas Pakistanis in America are Lahori/Muhajirs.

So its difficult to compare the situation here to the situation in other countries.
 
Can't comment about other countries I am just giving you the reasons why British Pakistanis ( mainly mirpuris) go for cousin marriages.

I think around 70% of British Pakistanis are Mirpuri whereas the overseas Pakistanis in America are Lahori/Muhajirs.

So its difficult to compare the situation here to the situation in other countries.

That's a possible explanation. Even though they are coming from Pakistan in both cases, it's different set of people. This problem may be due to certain immigrant group dominating the immigration in UK.
 
The major reason of marrying a cousin amongst British-Pakistanis is so that they can bring the child of their uncle, aunt, or taya over to the UK, thus helping the family to come out of poverty and become prosperous. All my cousins are settled in the UK and all of them married their cousins.

In fact, my aunt who lives in Pakistan told my UK cousin to marry her daughter even if he doesn't like her and divorce her once she gets permanent residency in the UK. She explained that this would help them come out of abject poverty. My cousins refused and married another cousin whom he liked. Such arrangements are extremely common.

This is what we are dealing with!
 
12yrs on from this post..my severley disabled son is 20, my two daughters with needs are 17 & 13.

I have given up on blaming outside factors and I am just grateful for what I have. I am a full time carer for my son which itself is a job..currently taking a break from employment. The other half takes care of the girls.

That being said..it does break my heart to see my children like this. I don’t know what they are going through because they are not able to tell us. As a family, there is not much that we can do by way of activities..even in this hot weather. But we live on and are grateful.
Reading this post now as a dad, sincere hats off to you. What you're dealing with is extremely painful, and challenging, and Inshallah there will be reward for this hardship in the hereafter.
 
12yrs on from this post..my severley disabled son is 20, my two daughters with needs are 17 & 13.

I have given up on blaming outside factors and I am just grateful for what I have. I am a full time carer for my son which itself is a job..currently taking a break from employment. The other half takes care of the girls.

That being said..it does break my heart to see my children like this. I don’t know what they are going through because they are not able to tell us. As a family, there is not much that we can do by way of activities..even in this hot weather. But we live on and are grateful.

I truly commend your love, patience and perseverance. The biggest test on this planet is to take care of a disabled child. You are an amazing human being!
 
Shouldn't this apply to Pakistani immigrants to other nations as well? What's unique about Pakistani migrating to Britain?

Like Norway cited above? Even in US, there is no issue to bring your spouse if you marry a non-Citizen. Expected trend over any long period should be down and not up. That's what I would expect.

Keeping wealth was more prevalent in agricultural society all around the world in old era. That's not the case now. Immigration is surely a huge factor, but it does not explain British Pakistani being an outlier when compared to Pakistani immigrant in other countries.

Pakistanis in US and Norway in general are more educated and white collar professionals coming from steady if not strong financial background. Even percentage of Pakistani women working in US is pretty good. This obviously means greater education, awareness , financial independence and decision making prowess and hence you see such issues much less in US.
 
Here's my take on it as someone severely impacted by this awful practice: I am firmly against cousin marriage. Because of generations of cousin marriages in my family, I was born deaf and with severe peripheral vision loss. (Tunnel vision, I can only see straight ahead). I had surgery to get hearing implants when I was young and received training, so I can hear and talk normally now. (I'm 22 now).

My eyesight though is super stressful though; I'm always afraid of it getting worse (thankfully it hasn't) but since I have tunnel vision I can't drive, and navigating dark, crowded settings is difficult.

Despite this though, I've always been good in my studies, and will be graduating university soon and working on being a chartered accountant in Canada and outside of not being able to drive I've managed well. Still a stressful life I've lived though honestly.

I feel very strongly about this topic as this has directly impacted me and the thought of cousin marriage and Islam allowing it will bother me forever. But personally myself (and my brother who thankfully is not disabled) have decided this practice will end in our family and we will be marrying far, far outside of the family.

Just wanted to share my experience.
 
12yrs on from this post..my severley disabled son is 20, my two daughters with needs are 17 & 13.

I have given up on blaming outside factors and I am just grateful for what I have. I am a full time carer for my son which itself is a job..currently taking a break from employment. The other half takes care of the girls.

That being said..it does break my heart to see my children like this. I don’t know what they are going through because they are not able to tell us. As a family, there is not much that we can do by way of activities..even in this hot weather. But we live on and are grateful.

Oh god! That is a stressful situation to hear and I'm sorry to hear about it. You are doing great and keep it up! I can relate somewhat but not quite as severely as you have it; read my post above this reply but essentially I'm in the disabled child's point of view. But I totally agree about being firmly against it!
 
Here's my take on it as someone severely impacted by this awful practice: I am firmly against cousin marriage. Because of generations of cousin marriages in my family, I was born deaf and with severe peripheral vision loss. (Tunnel vision, I can only see straight ahead). I had surgery to get hearing implants when I was young and received training, so I can hear and talk normally now. (I'm 22 now).

My eyesight though is super stressful though; I'm always afraid of it getting worse (thankfully it hasn't) but since I have tunnel vision I can't drive, and navigating dark, crowded settings is difficult.

Despite this though, I've always been good in my studies, and will be graduating university soon and working on being a chartered accountant in Canada and outside of not being able to drive I've managed well. Still a stressful life I've lived though honestly.

I feel very strongly about this topic as this has directly impacted me and the thought of cousin marriage and Islam allowing it will bother me forever. But personally myself (and my brother who thankfully is not disabled) have decided this practice will end in our family and we will be marrying far, far outside of the family.

Just wanted to share my experience.

I believe I read somewhere that British Pakistanis account for just over 1 percent of the population and represent 25 percent of babies born with some sort of disability due to cousin marriages. It’s allowed in Islam so will be hard to eradicate the practice.
 
I believe I read somewhere that British Pakistanis account for just over 1 percent of the population and represent 25 percent of babies born with some sort of disability due to cousin marriages. It’s allowed in Islam so will be hard to eradicate the practice.

That's crazy! I'm Canadian and in my experience amongst Pakistani diaspora here, cousin marriage happens sometimes but not as often as British Pakistanis - the Pakistanis here are more, modern? You can say.

Unfortunately yes Islam allows it so it won't ever go away.
 
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I think not an issue in the USA either. However I think I mentioned before I have a relative who are cousins. All three kids have issues learning.
 
I believe I read somewhere that British Pakistanis account for just over 1 percent of the population and represent 25 percent of babies born with some sort of disability due to cousin marriages. It’s allowed in Islam so will be hard to eradicate the practice.

"The number of babies born with birth defects in Bradford is nearly double the national average, research conducted in the city has shown."Consanguineous marriage accounted for nearly a third of abnormalities in a study of more than 11,300 babies."

Source:https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-leeds-23183102
 
I think not an issue in the USA either. However I think I mentioned before I have a relative who are cousins. All three kids have issues learning.

I watched this documentary and I almost cried. It documents the devastating effects on cousin marriages amongst British Pakistanis on children. The parents were told not to have any more children after their first two were born severely disabled, but they kept having more children. They had 3 more children who were also born disabled. What a lack of responsibility! Totally callous and criminal!
 
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How anyone can marry their own cousin is simply beyond me. The very concept itself disgusts me.
 
Hey. It’s an Islamic concept. How dare u speak against it ….

How can someone get his son married to his brother's daughter? In my mind it's no different than siblings getting married to each other.
 
How anyone can marry their own cousin is simply beyond me. The very concept itself disgusts me.

It differs from culture to culture. Just because in some cultures cousins are considered brothers and sisters, it need not be the same everywhere else. Infact cousin marriage is actually the norm across many regions in the world except the North India (Maharashtra to Bengal arc) where it is socially prohibited. Over period I have learnt not to be prejudiced about it and accept it as a cultural norm in certain regions. But then people must be aware of the unfortunate effects that it may lead to as testified by many posters.
 
It differs from culture to culture. Just because in some cultures cousins are considered brothers and sisters, it need not be the same everywhere else. Infact cousin marriage is actually the norm across many regions in the world except the North India (Maharashtra to Bengal arc) where it is socially prohibited. Over period I have learnt not to be prejudiced about it and accept it as a cultural norm in certain regions. But then people must be aware of the unfortunate effects that it may lead to as testified by many posters.

Forget culture, as an individual, will you get you child married to you sibling's child?
 
It differs from culture to culture. Just because in some cultures cousins are considered brothers and sisters, it need not be the same everywhere else. Infact cousin marriage is actually the norm across many regions in the world except the North India (Maharashtra to Bengal arc) where it is socially prohibited. Over period I have learnt not to be prejudiced about it and accept it as a cultural norm in certain regions. But then people must be aware of the unfortunate effects that it may lead to as testified by many posters.
Yes but it’s not right biologically We have learned that and now we should adapt.
 
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