Is marrying for love a modern Western idea?

[Wave your flag]

In ancient times, marriage was an institution among the wealthy, arranged entirely by parents as part of their political and economic strategy. Many cultures saw love as an impediment to marriage, best practiced outside of it. When did the modern idea of love-based marriage become common?

To westerners, love can be seen much more appealing. They have access to anything and everything, which would allow them to escape from reality, books, internet, films and TV. This would create a concept of the perfect life, through the perfect person, which is interpreted as true love. The issue with a love marriage is that it overlooks these impractical incompatibilities. Love seems invincible, something that can conquer all issues – you don’t need money when you have love! You don’t need to be practical when you’re in love! You’ll manage! Love will get you through!

NO. Practical compatibility is key.

In places like India, Africa and the Middle East, culture encourages the concept of the family as being your main priority. If the family is the main priority, you will listen to them, and you will trust them. The arranged marriage will in fact take into account practicality, logic and compatibility – these are LONG TERM necessities that will make the marriage last, instead of solely love. The most important part of the arranged marriage is also the fact that – you can blame your family if it doesn’t work out. They will not be able to say “I told you so, I told you he wasn’t right for you, I told you it wouldn’t last”

 

[Robert]

Even if you go back to Jane Austen, marriage in the West has usually been a combination of love with socio-economic advancement. That's if you have the option. Plenty of shotgun weddings here until fairly recently!

 

[CricketCartoons]

Even if you go back to Jane Austen, marriage in the West has usually been a combination of love with socio-economic advancement. That's if you have the option. Plenty of shotgun weddings here until fairly recently!

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a man in possession of good fortune must be in need of a wife.

 

[PakLFC]

What love? Most westerners marry for physical or financial reasons.

 

[Pakistanian]

Golddiggers still exist.

 

[Syed1]

People arent marrying in the west anymore... And those that are, are getting divorced at a rapid rate. Arranged marriages are not between two individuals but instead two families and this ensures all difficulties can be amicably resolved (unless they get too out of hand)

Best bet is for girl and boy to find each other, date for a bit and then get the families to work out the nitty gritties. Mix of West and East.

 

[JaDed]

In arranged marriages esp in desilands the individuality of males and females are never matured/grown.

Its a societal conditioning where the pair always have to be within a line,marry at this age/have kids/education for kids same circle.

Reach for the Stars!!

 

[CricketCartoons]

In arranged marriages esp in desilands the individuality of males and females are never matured/grown.

Its a societal conditioning where the pair always have to be within a line,marry at this age/have kids/education for kids same circle.

Reach for the Stars!!

Arranged marriages are more liberal and advanced than love marriages. You go physical with a stranger before falling in love, but in conservative love marriages it is the opposite.

 

[JaDed]

Arranged marriages are more liberal and advanced than love marriages. You go physical with a stranger before falling in love, but in conservative love marriages it is the opposite.

How is that advanced?

 

[CricketCartoons]

How is that advanced?

Having no qualms with intimacy with a stranger whom you don't love, yet. More open than conservative love marriages.

 

[cricketjoshila]

Enough evidence exist that marrying for love in ancient India exists.Hindu text books are filled with such examples.So its not a western concept.At least not in India.

 

[JaDed]

Having no qualms with intimacy with a stranger whom you don't love, yet. More open than conservative love marriages.

Having intimacy for the sake of your family and society,lol no.

 

[Abdul]

We're not living in stone age anymore.

 

[CricketCartoons]

Having intimacy for the sake of your family and society,lol no.

And what is wrong with that? Our society and family has the right to know that everything is fine in our bedroom and keeps asking you if there is any good news. If the wife has a headache or vomits, the town starts talking that she is pregnant. If too much delay, the town starts wondering if the guy or the girl is at fault and if it can be cured. You won't see such well wishers in western communities which is the reason why their society has decayed and fertility rates have dropped.