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The Anti-"Match Thread" Thread | Imaginary vs Nonexistent | Fictitious Stadium | February 30, -2015

saadibaba said:
Oh what have you reminded me....such a charming beauty with a classic "girl next door" persona. Have gotten a bit chubby I've heard.
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Yes, gets better with age. Never fancied her much as a young girl in the 90's, but she has really grown over me in the last few years.
 
Nostalgic said:
As it happens, the halal meat store is owned by people from the certain country. I would put it off, but I'll need to go some day.

Maybe I'll go vegan until I leave MN.
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Try out the halal meat shop at 'Holyland'. I've bought from their halal shop in the past when I needed particular cuts of meat.
 
Nostalgic said:
As it happens, the halal meat store is owned by people from the certain country. I would put it off, but I'll need to go some day.

Maybe I'll go vegan until I leave MN.
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I know....I get pushed into going to the store owned by people from that certain country which I hate as well yet I have to go or else no meat dishes. Again, the hypocrisy at play that has become a norm in my life continues....
 
Mamoon said:
Yes, gets better with age. Never fancied her much as a young girl in the 90's, but she has really grown over me in the last few years.
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Is she back...I though she retired after getting married to that actor with a beard.
 
saadibaba said:
Is she back...I though she retired after getting married to that actor with a beard.
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Yeah, she starred in Khuda Aur Muhabbat and a few other serials. Also hosting a cooking show. Quite a regular guest on various morning shows as well.

Qaiser Khan something, the rugged guy who often played some Sindhi wadera, but has been out of the scene for a few years I think. Speaking of Sindhi waderas, no one pulled them off as well as Shafi Muhammad.
 
yeh cheez said:
Try out the halal meat shop at 'Holyland'. I've bought from their halal shop in the past when I needed particular cuts of meat.
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Too much of a drive from the South suburbs. Only thing I hate more than humiliation is the tedium of being stuck in traffic.
 
Mamoon said:
Yeah, she starred in Khuda Aur Muhabbat and a few other serials. Also hosting a cooking show. Quite a regular guest on various morning shows as well.

Qaiser Khan something, the rugged guy who often played some Sindhi wadera, but has been out of the scene for a few years I think. Speaking of Sindhi waderas, no one pulled them off as well as Shafi Muhammad.
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Cooking shows haan....I need to check them out. She can be our very own Angela Lawson. There is something about voluptuous beauties stirring a pot or tasting delicately followed by the compulsory cooing sounds or sighing that is so damn.....appetizing ;-)

Shafi was the King of TV drama acting imo. Best of the best.
 
saadibaba said:
Cooking shows haan....I need to check them out. She can be our very own Angela Lawson. There is something about voluptuous beauties stirring a pot or tasting delicately followed by the compulsory cooing sounds or sighing that is so damn.....appetizing ;-)

Shafi was the King of TV drama acting imo. Best of the best.
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If it's aunties at cooking shows we're talking about, there's Kiran Khan. She's blossomed beautifully. She even made a risqué comment on air that Mubasshir Lucman took exception too.
 
Nostalgic said:
If it's aunties at cooking shows we're talking about, there's Kiran Khan. She's blossomed beautifully. She even made a risqué comment on air that Mubasshir Lucman took exception too.
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How about that over smart sharp tongue hijabi aunty whose all the rage nowadays...I've heard her daughter is doing a cooking show as well. The live calls during the show are literally lol worthy.
 
saadibaba said:
How about that over smart sharp tongue hijabi aunty whose all the rage nowadays...I've heard her daughter is doing a cooking show as well. The live calls during the show are literally lol worthy.
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No live call matches the "aur aur aur" one.
 
saadibaba said:
How about that over smart sharp tongue hijabi aunty whose all the rage nowadays...I've heard her daughter is doing a cooking show as well. The live calls during the show are literally lol worthy.
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Chef Rahat? I don't really watch cooking shows, I just glimpse at them if my wife is watching. But yes the calls are hilarious. People requesting run of the mill dishes that have been done to death, people asking them to talk to their brother/sister/grandfather/great uncle, the hosts starting off with mini religious sermons to establish the correct Muslim cooking show credentials.

There's a Parsi chef Zarnak Sidhwa (is she related to Bapsi Sidhwa?) who is the only one who is visibly irritated by the inanity of the calls. I wonder sometimes how she puts up with it all.
 
Nostalgic said:
Chef Rahat? I don't really watch cooking shows, I just glimpse at them if my wife is watching. But yes the calls are hilarious. People requesting run of the mill dishes that have been done to death, people asking them to talk to their brother/sister/grandfather/great uncle, the hosts starting off with mini religious sermons to establish the correct Muslim cooking show credentials.

There's a Parsi chef Zarnak Sidhwa (is she related to Bapsi Sidhwa?) who is the only one who is visibly irritated by the inanity of the calls. I wonder sometimes how she puts up with it all.
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I've seen minutes of Chef Rahat's show for comedy relief. She fancies herself as a preacher/entertainer hybrid as well as a chef. The comment I love the most in these live calls is "Aap kitni achi lag rahi hain" to which the host instead of being humbled goes along as it's the norm.
 
saadibaba said:
I've seen minutes of Chef Rahat's show for comedy relief. She fancies herself as a preacher/entertainer hybrid as well as a chef. The comment I love the most in these live calls is "Aap kitni achi lag rahi hain" to which the host instead of being humbled goes along as it's the norm.
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As the saying goes, khuda husn deta hai to nazaakat aa hee jaati hai.
 
Someone sent me a link one time of this cooking show hosted by Anwar Maqsood's sister Zubaida Aapa. Apparently she is also a natural homeopathic pseudo neem Hakeem healer as well. During one of her cooking shows a lady called to ask what to do about her protruding tummy, the fat on it for some reason not reducing despite dieting etc. To which Zubaida Aapa replied that she should start wearing right undergarments....only she called undergarments something else.
 
saadibaba said:
Someone sent me a link one time of this cooking show hosted by Anwar Maqsood's sister Zubaida Aapa. Apparently she is also a natural homeopathic pseudo neem Hakeem healer as well. During one of her cooking shows a lady called to ask what to do about her protruding tummy, the fat on it for some reason not reducing despite dieting etc. To which Zubaida Aapa replied that she should start wearing right undergarments....only she called undergarments something else.
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"Zubaida Aapa ke totkay" is an actual website/show, that has been parodied.

I'll look for it later when I'm on the laptop.
 
saadibaba said:
Mathira haan....I will for sure...maybe close to bedtime ;-)
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Come to think of it...I've seen that one....apparently Lucman did a show on vulgarity on Pak TV's and the medley had this clip as well.....
 
Well, I dodged the bullet: we're ordering pizza today. Must make sure I get the trip over and done with before the 22nd though.
 
Nostalgic said:
Well, I dodged the bullet: we're ordering pizza today. Must make sure I get the trip over and done with before the 22nd though.
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What's on 22nd....another match with country who likes eating fish ?
 
saadibaba said:
What's on 22nd....another match with country who likes eating fish ?
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Well, the policy on this thread is not to acknowledge the existence of any match, so I can't comment one way or the other. But yes, the event on the 22nd does indeed involve that country.

It is one of those dead rubber type events, where one usually tries to salvage pride. If any remnants of pride exist to be salvaged.
 
Out of the blue, I'm overwhelmed with a feeling of inadequacy. I must achieve something today. Something to gloat about on Facebook. It must be momentous, yet quick and easy.

Ideas?
 
Nostalgic said:
Too much of a drive from the South suburbs. Only thing I hate more than humiliation is the tedium of being stuck in traffic.
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You only have a few weeks left in MN, perhaps its time to spread your wings and explore a bit. :106:
 
yeh cheez said:
You only have a few weeks left in MN, perhaps its time to spread your wings and explore a bit. :106:
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But you see, the trouble with that is I may find things I like, and then rue the fact that I spent two years here being miserable, when I could've been slightly less miserable. That will make me even more miserable.
 
Nostalgic said:
Out of the blue, I'm overwhelmed with a feeling of inadequacy. I must achieve something today. Something to gloat about on Facebook. It must be momentous, yet quick and easy.

Ideas?
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Take a picture of yourself with the teddy bear at the Teddy Bear Park, maybe you can even climb up and sit on its head. :shrug

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That guy in orange looks like he's about to charge and tackle the poor teddy, in rugby style. The teddy won't know what hit him.

I empathize with the teddy. Sometimes life does exactly this to you.
 
Momentum matters. The guy in orange has momentum, or will at the point of impact. The teddy is quite literally, resting on his laurels (you can't see it from this angle, but the laurels are under him). He is allowing inexperienced people of short stature to run his show, and they're all over him. Is it any wonder that the guy in orange will bring him down?

There's a life lesson here. Momentum will trump inertia. And the mighty eventually fall.

Also, if you're the guy in orange, and you don't succeed, say, 47 times, try again.
 
Nostalgic said:
Out of the blue, I'm overwhelmed with a feeling of inadequacy. I must achieve something today. Something to gloat about on Facebook. It must be momentous, yet quick and easy.

Ideas?
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I went to the gym after a long time and worked out for two and a half hours...in the end ran out machines and weights to work on. After that, I sat with some extended family members visiting from Pakistan for a couple of hours reminiscing about old Karachi. Following that I bought tickets for myself and family to an upcoming Chinese dance theatre performance next month. I was asked to pick up lunch from outside and during my drive there I listened to a very interesting discussion on gay marriage on NPR which only recently I became a sustaining member of. So already at least four things I can be proud of and the day is not even over yet. :)
 
saadibaba said:
I went to the gym after a long time and worked out for two and a half hours...in the end ran out machines and weights to work on. After that, I sat with some extended family members visiting from Pakistan for a couple of hours reminiscing about old Karachi. Following that I bought tickets for myself and family to an upcoming Chinese dance theatre performance next month. I was asked to pick up lunch from outside and during my drive there I listened to a very interesting discussion on gay marriage on NPR which only recently I became a sustaining member of. So already at least four things I can be proud of and the day is not even over yet. :)
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Shen Yun or some other one?
 
yeh cheez said:
No I haven't, but have looked into it in the past and heard its good.
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For someone with only a rudimentary interest in Chinese culture, hopefully it won't be a yawn fest. Will let you know soon.
 
So how does the Cirque du Soleil compare to our own Lucky Irani Circus? Do they even have the notorious Maut ka Kuunwaan?
 
Nostalgic said:
So how does the Cirque du Soleil compare to our own Lucky Irani Circus? Do they even have the notorious Maut ka Kuunwaan?
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Lucky Irani Circus - I had to google the name to make sure you weren't kidding.

Who is the lucky Irani of the circus, the acrobat that gets to go home without breaking a leg? :))
 
yeh cheez said:
Lucky Irani Circus - I had to google the name to make sure you weren't kidding.

Who is the lucky Irani of the circus, the acrobat that gets to go home without breaking a leg? :))
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The guy who rides the bike in the Maut ka Kuunwaan is very lucky.

They had those Central Asian trapeze artist aunties who were very pleasing to the eye. I'm not sure if they still do.
 
yeh cheez said:
Lucky Irani Circus - I had to google the name to make sure you weren't kidding.

Who is the lucky Irani of the circus, the acrobat that gets to go home without breaking a leg? :))
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Yeh Cheez, seems like you had a very sheltered childhood and upbringing in Pakistan. Who doesn't know the infamous Lucky Irani circus.

The Maut ka Kunwa stunt is seriously death defying. A guy goes round in round in a small cage on a bike and one slip or mistake can cause him to fall down and breaking his neck. These guys literally put their lives on the line everyday for a miserly amount of money. It's as scary a thing as I have ever seen live.
 
yeh cheez said:
Lucky Irani Circus - I had to google the name to make sure you weren't kidding.

Who is the lucky Irani of the circus, the acrobat that gets to go home without breaking a leg? :))
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I think they used to tour the country and in Karachi one of their shows was just behind Pats primary section's open lot

unfortunately never got to watch one but by all accounts it was some experience
 
Nostalgic said:
The guy who rides the bike in the Maut ka Kuunwaan is very lucky.

They had those Central Asian trapeze artist aunties who were very pleasing to the eye. I'm not sure if they still do.
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I don't think Cirque du Soleil has that stunt but other small time circus or fairs have that. I have not seen one in US but its featured in a movie "The Place beyond the Pines" where the protagonist played by Ryan Gosling plays such a driver. He eventually gets involved with some bad guys, robs a bank and takes off on a bike eventually ending up dead.
 
saadibaba said:
Yeh Cheez, seems like you had a very sheltered childhood and upbringing in Pakistan. Who doesn't know the infamous Lucky Irani circus.

The Maut ka Kunwa stunt is seriously death defying. A guy goes round in round in a small cage on a bike and one slip or mistake can cause him to fall down and breaking his neck. These guys literally put their lives on the line everyday for a miserly amount of money. It's as scary a thing as I have ever seen live.
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I do admit I had a sheltered upbringing. Having lived 20 years in Karachi, I didnt even get to see any other city in Pakistan, other than a day in Isloo to get my US visa. My siblings took a tour of Pakistan where they went to Moen-jo-Daro, Lahore, Chitral, etc. and I missed out because I had my exams in a few weeks. :(

I am very well aware what a maut ka kunwa is I just didnt know it was called Lucky Irani.
 
saadibaba said:
I don't think Cirque du Soleil has that stunt but other small time circus or fairs have that. I have not seen one in US but its featured in a movie "The Place beyond the Pines" where the protagonist played by Ryan Gosling plays such a driver. He eventually gets involved with some bad guys, robs a bank and takes off on a bike eventually ending up dead.
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So much effort to still end up dead in the end. Could've just kept riding the bike in the circus.
 
yeh cheez said:
I do admit I had a sheltered upbringing. Having lived 20 years in Karachi, I didnt even get to see any other city in Pakistan, other than a day in Isloo to get my US visa. My siblings took a tour of Pakistan where they went to Moen-jo-Daro, Lahore, Chitral, etc. and I missed out because I had my exams in a few weeks. :(

I am very well aware what a maut ka kunwa is I just didnt know it was called Lucky Irani.
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No problems....I'm sure millions in Pakistan will trade their life with yours in a heartbeat if had a choice. Lucky Irani is the whole circus show with acrobats, elephants, lions and what not....Maut ka kunwa is just one aspect of that show.
 
Stuntsmen of "Maut Ka kuwan" have graduated from Physics with paper written on gravity, momentum, acceleration and inertia in their head. Fantasy degree you see!
 
Nostalgic said:
But you see, the trouble with that is I may find things I like, and then rue the fact that I spent two years here being miserable, when I could've been slightly less miserable. That will make me even more miserable.
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This means that you should do all the things that depress you about it: find the flattest part of MN (with no relief beyond the horizon), sit down sartorially and start contemplating how boring that state is.
 
endymion248 said:
This means that you should do all the things that depress you about it: find the flattest part of MN (with no relief beyond the horizon), sit down sartorially and start contemplating how boring that state is.
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How are my sartorial mannerisms relevant? I'll do what you said, but I'll wear what I want.
 
Nostalgic said:
Out of the blue, I'm overwhelmed with a feeling of inadequacy. I must achieve something today. Something to gloat about on Facebook. It must be momentous, yet quick and easy.

Ideas?
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Spend 5 seconds outside to take a photo of a Minnesota street, apply every filter known to man and post it so people see how deep and philosophical you are.

Of course your more cynical/non idiot friends will see right through it but the others will lick it up.

This also works with food
 
Donal Cozzie said:
Spend 5 seconds outside to take a photo of a Minnesota street, apply every filter known to man and post it so people see how deep and philosophical you are.

Of course your more cynical/non idiot friends will see right through it but the others will lick it up.

This also works with food
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These filters, do I apply them before, during or after taking the photo? Do they clip on to the lens or do you tape them on?
 
Nostalgic said:
These filters, do I apply them before, during or after taking the photo? Do they clip on to the lens or do you tape them on?
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You apply them with your heart.

Anyways, onto the game taking place here, I have to say I back Imaginary to win this one. In Not Real they have a top class all rounder in the Kapil Dev mould, and in Ap Arrition they have a gun finisher in the lower middle order.

Nonexistant have decent spinners like G Host but I cant see them keeping the home side quiet
 
Donal Cozzie said:
You apply them with your heart.

Anyways, onto the game taking place here, I have to say I back Imaginary to win this one. In Not Real they have a top class all rounder in the Kapil Dev mould, and in Ap Arrition they have a gun finisher in the lower middle order.

Nonexistant have decent spinners like G Host but I cant see them keeping the home side quiet
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Kapil Dev?!?! Bah and humbug.

I mean here we are, hurting, and trying not to pick at the scab by avoiding the elephant in the room, and you're saying our Oxford-educated, eloquently-spoken, rakishly handsome, supremely arrogant, reverse-swinging all-rounder isn't a suitable prototype for Not Real? Our boy takes being an all-rounder so seriously, he is philanderer, philanthropist, preacher and Prime Minister in waiting, all at once.

On second thought, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. Dev, when written in Urdu, is written the same as Deo, which is a man-eating giant that frequently appears in fairy tales. So it fits in well with the supernatural theme you've developed for the teams.

The Deo is likely to suddenly show up at a human dwelling, and tap with its giant finger on a randomly selected house. By sunset, that house must provide a child for the Deo to consume. If they don't, the Deo will take all the children.

One story my grandma used to tell me (to lull me to a traumatic sleep) was about two children who are lost. At dusk, they find themselves in a haunted forest. Eventually they see a light, and find a house that they go into. Inside is an old hag, who alternately laughs and cries at seeing them. They ask her what the hell is wrong with her and if she's lost her marbles. She says she laughed because she hasn't seen another human face in years. And she cried because soon the Deo will be back, and will deep fry them in oil and eat them.

Just then, the Deo returns. He traps the poor kids, kindles a fire, and places a cauldron (probably stainless steel) filled with oil (probably canola) on the fire. When it reaches its smoke point (which for canola is 375 to 450 F), he asks the kids to circle it. The idea is, when he deems appropriate, he'll push them in.

The kids are smart though, top of their class, and they pretend not to know how to walk around the cauldron in circles. So the Deo shows them. This is when they seize the moment, and push the Deo into the oil instead. Et viola, deep fried Deo.

They didn't live happily ever after, because who does? The old hag died of a diabetic coma soon after.

There's a bit of doggerel that I've translated for you, which suggests that the Deo trumps even the Jinn:

Those were the days
When we were Jinn
Now we're Deos
Daddies of Jinn

Trust me, it sounds so much better in Urdu. You won't be able to understand it, but for those who can:

Woh bhee kya din they
Jab hum Jinn they
Ab hum Deo hein
Jinnon ke bhee piyo hein
 
I remember Cheema Deo, and his brother Leema Deo from Alif Laila. He used to introduce himself as "Cheema Deo naam hai mera, das loon toh zindagi fanaa". Coming to think about Alif Laila, i never understood why the evil guys used to praise Sindbad before the ensuing battle by saying "aye khuda ke naek banday sindbad.."
 
endymion248 said:
You can wear what you want but you'll have to ''goth marna'' (ie sit like a tailor).
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That puts my legs to sleep. I think I'll pick some other suitable yoga posture, with a weird name, like triple knotted double jointed upside down wolf pup. Or something.
 
CricketCartoons said:
I remember Cheema Deo, and his brother Leema Deo from Alif Laila. He used to introduce himself as "Cheema Deo naam hai mera, das loon toh zindagi fanaa". Coming to think about Alif Laila, i never understood why the evil guys used to praise Sindbad before the ensuing battle by saying "aye khuda ke naek banday sindbad.."
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The Cheemas are a Jatt clan, perennially at war with the Chatthas. That shaven-headed giant of a man, Shafqat Cheema, pride of the Cheemas, was for a long time Lollywood's premier villain, featuring in several blockbuster box-office draws starring the lovely Reema "Khan," and the even lovelier Babar Ali.

The Cheemas should never be underestimated. Hamid Nasir Chattha, their bete noir, once harbored ambitions of becoming Prime Minister. But the Cheemas thwarted him, and where is he now? Consigned to the scrap heap of history.
 
Nostalgic said:
That puts my legs to sleep. I think I'll pick some other suitable yoga posture, with a weird name, like triple knotted double jointed upside down wolf pup. Or something.
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Then you should definitely sit like I said. The essence of romanticism is when mind, body and setting all express the same emotion: boring in this case. After that, when you hear of MN, you will not just feel bored, you will also have emotions of boredom flowing through your legs. The simple thought of MN could replace somnifers for future reference.

By the way, I totally feel your hate for flatness. It's fundamentally oppressive. Also, the houses in midwestern suburbs are too open. You have big lawns and interconnected gardens (often not seperated by anything), there is no privacy.
 
When one finds oneself at the threshold of middle age, (or possibly well past the threshold into the dark, dreary innards of middle age), mid-life crises become a part and parcel of the experience. Every so often, the urge to wipe the slate clean assumes overwhelming proportions. But then, inertia, that other mid-life vice, resists, and resists valiantly.

Therefore, it is a relief that one can rely on others to wipe the slate clean. Wipe it squeaky clean in a sweeping motion. A clean sweep, in other words.
 
Would any one like to visit Bangladesh and maybe after that Ireland? Just to contrast the scenery you know.
 
Watsupdoc said:
Would any one like to visit Bangladesh and maybe after that Ireland? Just to contrast the scenery you know.
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I've promised [MENTION=136108]Donal Cozzie[/MENTION] I'll visit The Emerald Isle some day.

After we've done the obligatory James Joyce pilgrimage, he's going to show me all around Roscommon and Offally.
 
Nostalgic said:
I've promised [MENTION=136108]Donal Cozzie[/MENTION] I'll visit The Emerald Isle some day.

After we've done the obligatory James Joyce pilgrimage, he's going to show me all around Roscommon and Offally.
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Spell Offaly correct first :yk

Bit of a random post by watsupdoc tbh
 
As for the uh, other country, I still have to buy the halal meat. I was supposed to do it yesterday, but stupidly put it off. I think that will suffice, instead of a visit to the other, non-Irish country.
 
Donal Cozzie said:
Spell Offaly correct first :yk

Bit of a random post by watsupdoc tbh
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Well the autocorrect did underline it, but it only suggested Offal as an alternate. So I went with my instinct, which isn't saying much.

Last year you took me to task for spelling O'Raeilley incorrectly. I get it. You're sensitive to such mistakes and take them as an affront.
 
Nostalgic said:
I've promised [MENTION=136108]Donal Cozzie[/MENTION] I'll visit The Emerald Isle some day.

After we've done the obligatory James Joyce pilgrimage, he's going to show me all around Roscommon and Offally.
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You gonna go to the Irish pubs as well? :afridi
 
The French drink wine, the English tea.
The Yankee drinks his hot black coffee.
The child drinks milk nine times a day.
The Scotsman sips his whiskey toddy.
You can keep you wine and keep your tea!
My curse on him that brings me coffee!
I'll drink porter, if I may.
It makes me feel content and happy.
Porter quaffed down with a laugh.
The gentry have their aching livers.
Water is all right in tea,
For fish, and things that swim in rivers.
The poor man and the beggar, too,
The poet in the corner thinking.
If they'd money enough to spend,
It's pints of porter they'd be drinking.
Porter quaffed down with a laugh.
The gentry have their aching livers.
 
saadibaba said:
The French drink wine, the English tea.
The Yankee drinks his hot black coffee.
The child drinks milk nine times a day.
The Scotsman sips his whiskey toddy.
You can keep you wine and keep your tea!
My curse on him that brings me coffee!
I'll drink porter, if I may.
It makes me feel content and happy.
Porter quaffed down with a laugh.
The gentry have their aching livers.
Water is all right in tea,
For fish, and things that swim in rivers.
The poor man and the beggar, too,
The poet in the corner thinking.
If they'd money enough to spend,
It's pints of porter they'd be drinking.
Porter quaffed down with a laugh.
The gentry have their aching livers.
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Luca Brasi sleeps with the fishes tonight.

I can think of several others who should join him there.
 
Firebreaker said:
What is this thread about?
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White squirrels, crazy Irishmen, Porterhouse steak, fond farewells, our old friends Faiz, Nayyara, Tina, Arshad, Naeem, and Jamal, St Patrick's, convents, aunties, halal meat, fish, Jinns and Deos, and miscellaneous mid-life crises.
 
Nostalgic said:
Luca Brasi sleeps with the fishes tonight.

I can think of several others who should join him there.
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Luca Brasi reminds me of the protagonist in the song "My name is Luka" by Suzanne Vega

"They only hit until you cry
After that you don't ask why"

Perfectly explains the plight of a certain nonexistent gang of meat-eaters.....
 
It was my first year at the University, I am in a classroom, Professor mumbling, students mindlessly jotting down his writings from the blackboard onto their books, suddenly we hear loud sounds *bang* *bang* *bang*....., Professor screams; 'Everyone get down!!', we all hit the dusty floor.

When its all quiet again, we all stand up and brush ourselves, the Professor is embarrassed, they weren't gunshots - only phatakay.
 
saadibaba said:
Luca Brasi reminds me of the protagonist in the song "My name is Luka" by Suzanne Vega

"They only hit until you cry
After that you don't ask why"

Perfectly explains the plight of a certain nonexistent gang of meat-eaters.....
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I remember this song. Suzanne Vega was one of a crop of young acoustic singer-songwriters that emerged in the early to mid 90s.

It's always exciting, getting a crop of youngsters. Some crops however look like they were planted in a drought and harvested in a bitter winter, and are mostly chaff and not enough wheat. That often prompts us more jaded, seasoned types to shake our heads and bemoan the falling standards of planting and nurturing and harvesting and marketing.

On a rare positive note, there's always hope for the next crop. Paiwasta reh shajar se, umeed-e-bahaar rakh, and all that. 2019 may be a better harvest.
 
yeh cheez said:
It was my first year at the University, I am in a classroom, Professor mumbling, students mindlessly jotting down his writings from the blackboard onto their books, suddenly we hear loud sounds *bang* *bang* *bang*....., Professor screams; 'Everyone get down!!', we all hit the dusty floor.

When its all quiet again, we all stand up and brush ourselves, the Professor is embarrassed, they weren't gunshots - only phatakay.
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There are firecrackers, and then there are duds. Damp squibs. Misfiring guns. Much-vaunted magnums that fire blanks.

I've repeated this sher before too:

Piyaas tishna labon ki jo naa bujhaaein Nayim
Doob marr jayein samandar mein woh kaaley baadal

The poet was referring to just such duds, in this case his good-for-nothing son, a classmate of mine. We used to call him Prince Charles (pronounced Char luss)
 
So, in my perennial quest to make time to write, I was reading my fifty sixth book on craft, and came across the Rule of Three.

In fiction, as in life, one occurrence is random. An isolated event. Two are a coincidence, because sometimes lightning strikes twice. Three is a pattern. A sequence. A trend.

A chill crept down (or up?) my spine.
 
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