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The complexity of getting married

blinding light said:
Easy, ZS, I know how you meant that :)

Thanks for your comment :) Problematising PB might provide us the clue to aid Mamoon in wooing her successfully!

Almost like IR. I think this quote (by Churchill) fits PB as well as it did for the Soviet national interest defining the course of action: "It is a a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma."
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Yeah I think I am easy. Easy to rile up that is. lol After looking up at your posts, I saw you were joking, My bad.


You welcome, at one point I felt this thread lost its way. But thanks to your questions, I felt it got back on track. So continue on with your stuff. This indeed is the best way to help Mamoon. :)
 
Nostalgic said:
And the other bachas don't have an inkling either? Usually these things are hard to miss.

One thing is for sure: she's aware of the attention. Women have this innate sense, they always do.
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Perhaps they do but no one has ever told me anything or given me the indication that they know.

Either they don't care or are fine with it. :malik
 
blinding light said:
This is rich, coming from someone who denounces modern psychology and claims "there is no such thing as negative/positive."

I'd have never advised you to send that text if I knew you ogled at her like no one's business (despite being "subtle", girls can tell).

Haye, the possibility of attaining the walima look.. I can't say it..
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:facepalm:

What's the big deal if I do? she will reject me just because I look at her?
 
96NotOut said:
You stare at her, aankhen phaar phaar ke? :facepalm::facepalm::facepalm:
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96NotOut said:
Staring at her aankhen phaar phaar ke is one of the best and most effective ways to put her off. :facepalm:

He's never even SPOKEN to her for crying out loud. Mamoon, you... :110:
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:facepalm:

I stare at many eye candies. :amir

So what? Everyone does and secondly, I avoid eye contact as much as possible because it's awkward. I look at her when she's not looking at me, which means quite often because she doesn't look at me much.

And yes, I don't talk to her, she doesn't talk to me and neither does reply to my text(s) and on top of that you don't want me to even look at her? :14:

And if this puts her off, I don't know what to say.
 
No-one is saying don't look at her but don't come across as someone who is desperate.
Actually better than looking at her is u just try to start a convo with her, I know it's hard for u but u gotta try.
Going up to her and starting a convo is much less creepier than staring at her non-stop.
 
Guys, don´t use this thread for chit-chat, or else this one might go.

Mamoon said:
No. nothing. I know its hard to believe but we don't see each other often and when we do, we don't interact.

I do stare at her ankhain phaar phaar ke :amir, so perhaps she knows that I measuring her up. Honestly, I have no idea.

Is it a good thing or a bad thing?
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blinding light said:
:110: :110: :110: :110: :110:

:L

Bari jaldi yaad aya hay batana.
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I well and truly retire and rest my case:)):)))!
 
There's no harm in looking at her Mamoon but you have got to follow it up with some sort of interaction. Constant looking will make her think of you as a tharki and its very difficult to convince girls otherwise when they have a negative first impression of you.
 
Punisher said:
There's no harm in looking at her Mamoon but you have got to follow it up with some sort of interaction. Constant looking will make her think of you as a tharki and its very difficult to convince girls otherwise when they have a negative first impression of you.
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This is true. About time I move to the next level.
 
Haroon786 said:
Agreed, one of the reasons why you want to marry her is that you can't take your eyes off her.
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Obviously, I will never claim that her appearance doesn't attract me. It always plays a part, no matter how people claim that personality > appearance. In the long run yes personally trumps appearance but the latter is the very first thing that attracts you.
 
Mamoon said:
Obviously, I will never claim that her appearance doesn't attract me. It always plays a part, no matter how people claim that personality > appearance. In the long run yes personally trumps appearance but the latter is the very first thing that attracts you.
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Although you're probably overrating her.
 
Looks of a female can NEVER be a non entity for guys. Never.

The % may vary from guy to guy but it plays a part.

But yeah, when it comes to long term:

Personality, Intelligence, etc >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Looks.
 
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This is like the film "her" except instead of a computer Mamoon is in love with her twitter account lol
 
Mamoon said:
:facepalm:

I stare at many eye candies. :amir

So what? Everyone does and secondly, I avoid eye contact as much as possible because it's awkward. I look at her when she's not looking at me, which means quite often because she doesn't look at me much.

And yes, I don't talk to her, she doesn't talk to me and neither does reply to my text(s) and on top of that you don't want me to even look at her? :14:

And if this puts her off, I don't know what to say.
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Yes everyone does this and that's why they aren't great with girls.

She knows you are checking her out. That's not a bad thing (necessarily). What's bad is you don't have the guts to keep eye contact. And that makes you lose respect in front of her eyes.

See, many guys make the same mistake.

Girls who are attractive get checked out by guys who don't make eye contact (apart from creeps who stare at them hungrily). So when you act the same way like most guys, they lump you along with them and don't pay much attention to you.

You need to be different from other guys (proper different not weird different).
 
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Staring at her when she's not looking shows you're a creep objectifying her if you don't follow it up with any meaningful contact (which you don't).

To top it off, receiving a text at 3AM from the same guy (despite the contents of the text!) = :110:

The odds against us are greater than what you've been portraying so far, Mamoon.

You'll need to talk to her the next time you see her and NOT scope her out, for once!
 
:facepalm:

I will talk to her of course but I don't understand what's the big deal with looking at her. What were you expecting?
 
Mamoon said:
Well, can't count.
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And u haven't even spoken to her once but u keep staring at her.
Do u think she does not notice this?? I think she might have actually been put off by your non-conversation and must be having a perception that ur wierd.
U see the first time u met her, she could have thought ' oh well he's shy so must be not wanting to talk to me' but u have never since attempted to make a face to face convo to her, must have put her off badly.
 
Mamoon, you staring and ogling at her without eye contact and further action isn't cool, bud.

You can't bulldoze your way into her heart by that action alone. In fact, it has harmed you WAY more than you realize.

Blinding light is 100% right. Especially this statement of hers:

The odds against us are greater than what you've been portraying so far, Mamoon.
 
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Ok don't worry mamoon, what's gone is gone. We have to now chalk up a plan for the future.
look next time she comes to ur house, u just gotta find a way to show her ur paintings.
U have got to impress her somehow and make a way into her heart, I think showing her ur paintings will be a good step forward.
 
blinding light said:
Staring at her when she's not looking shows you're a creep objectifying her if you don't follow it up with any meaningful contact (which you don't).

To top it off, receiving a text at 3AM from the same guy (despite the contents of the text!) = :110:

The odds against us are greater than what you've been portraying so far, Mamoon.

You'll need to talk to her the next time you see her and NOT scope her out, for once!
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When are you leaving for US?
 
Mamoon, if you want to be in denial and thing this is not a big deal, then that's your loss, bro.

Battler and SIF are right. We need to chalk up a new plan, but its going to take a lot of smooth talking to allay her reservations and at least win a decent modicum of respect for yourself.

We need to be realistic here. According to prospect theory, if one feels they're operating in the realm of losses, they're actions are likely to be more risky. If one perceives their situation to be one where they are in the realm of gains, they will be risk-averse. The text, by and for itself, was neutral. But given the background of your ogling, the text now becomes a valid sign of you taking creepy interest in her. Which is off-putting and probably unnerving for PB.

It's a realm of losses for you right now, Mamoon. If you want to make some sort of progress, you need to man up and be bold - but whats more important is to bide your time for now. I was thinking about going forth with another move before Ramadan, but waiting it out for now seems to be the best course of action (time is always of essence - what makes a crisis truly grave is lack of time. Once you lay yourself back, wait it out, it'll diffuse the crisis-type situation you're sort of in right now, i.e. ensure PB's thoughts about you are somewhat mellowed down).

Bide your time. But the next time you meet her, you have to be freaking Afridi and you have to fight it out and win. No other course of action would get you a better result. It's do or die, now.
 
:facepalm:

I know I have to do something now. At least have a conversation with her.
 
My God Mamoon :facepalm:

Females are usually interested in paintings. Start a conversation with her and invite her to see your paintings in the process. You should have done this by now instead of just ogling at her and creep her out.
 
Sorry Mamoon, I believe you have a very low chance now.

She has to have labeled you a creep and pervert by now.
 
Woh aiyen humare ghar mein, Khuda ki qudrat hai
Kabhi hum unko, kabhi ghar ko dekhtay hein
 
Actually when our father used to come home from work, my sister and I would sing Mera Piyo Ghar Aya.
 
PB arrives at house

"Hey PB"
"Yeah Mamoon what is it?"
"Come here, there's something i want to show you" :yk
 
Donal Cozzie said:
PB arrives at house

"Hey PB"
"Yeah Mamoon what is it?"
"Come here, there's something i want to show you" :yk
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:)) Great!

Dude, I feel for you, Donal. You've probably been the most affected by recent developments. :( (In reference to the deleted threads).
 
Mamoon dear Ramzan mein koi aisa kaam nahi..Rozay germion k hayn, Larkion ko weysey bhi roza ziada he lagta hai..tu kaheen bisti na kerwa bethna.
 
BL, I missed you! :D

I guess since PB is his dad's neighbor, they just go there instead. :/
 
I spend more time at Mum's and I love that painting. Want to keep it close. :22:
 
Enter PB.

She notices that stunning painting. Perhaps asks about it. Either of your dad/father says its painted by Mamoon.

PB throws a glance at Mamoon. Probably with raised eyebrows

Cue Mamoon - clad in his best (pref, sherwani), preferably black - giving a lopsided grin of acknowledgement, but breaks eye contact first.

Mamoon keeps clear of her way (ESP no staring). They meet again at the dinner table, where he finally starts a conversation with her.

---

I was bored.
 
Anyone remember that text? 'hey missed you at our house' or something like that and then mamoon got blanked :))) :))) :)))
 
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